Narrator: It was your average day in the office of Colonel Roy Mustang. Hawkeye was doing paper work, Roy was drinking his coffee, Havok was chewing on a ciggy, and Fury was on the ground brawling over something of I don't know what. Havok: Fury, what is your problem? Fury: Nothing. Havok: Aw come on you can tell us. Fury: Nothing! ~silence~ Havok: Oh for the love of... *grabs Fury by the shoulder* Fury: *holding his finger* Havok: *death glare* Let me see! *pulls Fury's hands apart* Uuhhh… dude, it's just a paper cut. Fury: But it burns! Havok: Don't worry, a kiss will help. *kisses the paper cut* See, all better! *smiles* Fury: I guess so. Roy: Awww, that's sweet! Havok, you oughtha be a mother! Havok: WTF! *twitch* Hawkeye: you can be as caring and sweet… when ya wanna be. Havok: He was brawling his eyes out, someone had to do something. Roy: Ookkkaayy then, let's just forget this and get back to work, okay? Everyone: Okay! ~Later~ Ha! It's my break *stands up* time for some coffee. *walks out* Ed: *Walks in* Hello everyone *waves* Roy: Well Edward, why the peppy mood? Ed: Why you ask, I just William Hung's CD… he so sexy Roy: scuse me? Ed: Uuhhh… nothing! -silence- Ed: Okay then, ya wanna see? Everyone: Okay! Ed: *frisking himself* Havok: Is there a problem? Ed: I can't find my freakin' CD! “She Bang” is playing from the kitchen* Ed: What the hell! Roy: *jumps on his desk**points* To the kitchen! ~The Kitchen~ Roy: *big eyed* Hawkeye, what are you doing? *Hawkeye dancing and singing on the table* Ed: Give me my CD, NOW! Hawkeye: *sticks tongue out* NO! Fury: When did military officers get the right to dance and sing on the tables? Hawkeye: *turns music off* Since now! Havok: What is wrong with you? Hawkeye: NOTHING… wow Havok! I never noticed how hot you looked from here! *tackles Havok* Roy: OMFG! What is the world coming to?!! Ladies falling for Havok and not me!! Havok: Hey! Roy: *jumps on table* Hawkeye said she was going to get coffee, right? Someone must have done something to the coffee! Fury: *cough cough* Roy: That's right! *grabs Hawkeye by the arm* We must cure her of her horrid fate! Havok: What? Roy: We are going to make her a woman! ~Pause~ Narrator: Excuse me this is getting out of hand! Roy: What do you mean? Narrator: `Make her a woman'? Roy: Yeah? Narrator: Yeah! Roy: Uuhmm… how about we just go see the Fuhrer instead? Narrator: Okay, okay, you may continue. ~Continuing~ Roy: *shifty eyes* Forget about the making of the woman thing, we are going to see the Fuhrer instead *points* To the Fuhrer's office! ~Fuhrer's Office~ Fuhrer: Sitting in his shiny chair petting his kitty* Yes Mr. Boomboom we are evil, EVIL, MUFUHHAAHAHAH!!!! *door is kick down* Roy: Fuhrer sir, we have an issue! Fuhrer: Well aint the obvice! Kicking doors down, and of all of the doors, my door! Roy: Sorry sir. Fuhrer: Whatever. So what do you want? I'm practicing being evil! Roy: Well, ya see… Hawkeye has lost her ever loving mind and we don't know what to do! Can you please help for the love of peanut butter! Fuhrer: I will help, if you give me… *puts pinky to the corner of his mouth* I mmmiiilllliiiooonnnnn dollars MMUUUFUUUHHHAAHAHAH! Havok: Fuhrer for goodness sake! Fuhrer: FINE! *give Roy a pill* This should help. Roy: Thank you sir! Fuhrer: Yeah, yeah, yeah just leave! Everyone: *leaves* ~Roy's Office~ Hawkeye: Why Havok, why don't you love me? Havok: Hey Roy! Roy: Here Hawkeye *pinches Hawkeye by the cheeks* take your meds! Hawkeye: NO! *slaps Roy** jumps on desk and starts to take off her shirt* Roy: Damnit woman! Ed, restrain her! Ed: OKAY! *takes down the mad woman* Roy: Now here *forces pill into Hawkeye's mouth* be a good girl and sit there quietly. Hawkeye: Yes big daddy! *sits* Roy+Havok: *shudder* ~Later~ Narrator: It was now 11:38. Havok: *yawn* Ha! Nothing like sleep after a hard days work. Roy: Sure, work, Trying to keep Hawkeye off of you! Yeah, now you know how I feel. Havok: Whatever… goodnight! *leaves* Fury: I think I'll be taking my leave too. Roy: Goodnight! I hope you have fun! *wink wink* Fury: *slow backs away then leaves* Ed: Well, buh bye Colonel Bastard and 1st Lieutenant. Roy: Bye bye my luvly little alchemist. *blows a kiss* Ed: *blushes**runs out the door* Roy: Well, I guess it's just you and me *eyes Hawkeye* We still have work to do, so lets not dilly dally. Hawkeye: Yes sir! ~silence~ *gets up* Sir, I have to use the restroom, I'll be back as soon as possible. *walks out* Roy: *pointless stare**gets back to work* ~few minutes later~ Hawkeye: *walks in with drunken look on her face* Roy: Are you okay? Hawkeye: *walks up to desk**spreads arms out* Come and get it! Roy: Wah?! Hawkeye: Come and get it! Do I have to repeat myself? Roy: No! Hawkeye: Then what's wrong? Roy: Nothing! It's just that… well, I mean… Hawkeye: *crawls onto desk**pushes “melons” together* Oh, come on Roy. Look they're calling you, they want you! Roy: *twitch* Hawkeye: *tackles Roy* Roy: GET OFF! Hawkeye: But I need you Roy! Roy: AAAHAHAHAHHH *snaps* Narrator: Then Havok and Fury come back! Havok+Fury: *singing “She Bang:* Roy: STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT! Hawkeye: What is going on! Roy: Get this phony off of me! Havok: OMG there are 2 Hawkeye… WOOH! Roy: Oh please save me! Hawkeye that just walked in: *shots everyone in the head* oh, my bad! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Narrator: WTF! This had NOTHING to do with mother's day! OMFG! So screwed up! Me: I'm sorry, so sorry! It sadly made absolutely no sense what so ever! I got really confused with the Hawkeye thing! Everyone is so out of character it's not funny! Please, give me your honest opinion! Bye bye!!! *waves*