The Adventures of Generic Hero Guy! Chapter 4, the RIGHT Damsel in Distress Our hero finally reaches the CORRECT Watch Tower of Evil… GHG: Alright, time to save the RIGHT maiden. -Kicks down the tower door- ALRIGHT EVILDOERS, IF THIS ISN'T THE RIGHT TOWER, I'M GOING HOME. Minion #1: Oh no! Everybody, this is the moment we've been waiting for! CHYAAAAARGE! All the minions go charging towards Generic Hero Guy…But violence is bad, I better create a more family friendly scene. -Clips of little kittens playing with yarn, couples walking along the beach, and flowers blowing in the wind, while violent sword battles and yelling are heard in the background. Finally, the battle ends.- GHG: I HAVE EMERGED VICTORIOUS. I shall now save the damsel in distress! -Runs up the stairs and kicks down the damsel in distress's door- Fair maiden, I have come to take you away from this horrid place and return you to your home! DID: WELL IT'S ABOUT TIME. I WAITED AN EXTRA 2 MINUTES FOR YOU TO COME SAVE ME. GHG: …Does that mean you'll give me food? DID: …Return me to my kingdom at once so I may have my father behead you. GHG: Behead me? But why? I have rescued you! DID: RESCUED ME 2 MINUTES TOO LATE. I could have been slain in those 2 minutes! See, look at the script! -Whips out script- “GHG is to barge into the tower and begin battle at 5:00pm, emerge victorious at 5:03, and then barge into the DID's room at 5:05pm”! YOU CAME IN AT 5:07PM. UNFORGIVABLE. GHG: -Sigh- Lets just get you back to your kingdom… DID: And behead you. Yes indeed. Now carry me to your steed. GHG: -Sighs and carries DID to WHWSOB and they all ride back to the kingdom of whatever this kingdom is called.-