This story has no plot, I apologize. CHAPTER TWO: THE DAY (part two) (GIRL: WWWHHHYYYYYYY!?!!!) "Word!" shouted Al. "Al, don't try to cool talk," Ed said. "Yo, that rhymes. Ed...said...fo shi-ZZLE!" "I wasn't cool-talking, brother! I was playing I spy with Fletcher." "Which reminds me...Fletcher is NEVER coming over again!" Ed spat to Russel. "Whatchu mean, home dwag?" "I spent 30 minutes watching Schoolhouse Rock with him and Al. 30 minutes!!!!!! That's valuble alchemy-study time!" The bus arrived at the elementary school. Fletcher stood at the door and puffed out his chest. "Well, here I go. Out into the cold world to express my knowledge! I will learn! I will be taught! I will venture into the new and unknown, reach for the virgin and the rare! I will explore math, seek science, and--" "Your holding up the damn line!" shouted the other elementary school kids. "I'm preparing for knowledge!!!" Fletcher screamed. "Back off midgets!!!" He jumped off the bus. "Byyy-------e Alphonse!!!" "Byyy--------e, Fletcher! Have fun at schoooooool!!" The bus, it rolled on...to the high school. When the school saw the bus, it put up its cigarette and stood straight. "Okay, you in the front--get off first," said Steve. Poser Mobile got off and turned to Steve. "Fees, shorty, fees." "WHO YOU CALLIN' SO SHORT HE CAN'T EVEN PICK UP A QUARTER TO PAY THE FEES WITH CAUSE HE'S SO SMALL!?!?!?" Ed screamed. "Twenty-five cents to connect, yo!" Poser Mobile screamed and ran away. "Alright, everybody. Get off." Russel, Ed, and Al got off the bus and, side by side, walked in super-slow motion towards the scool. "Who was that masked man?" said some chick. "Doesn't it suck that you and Al are in the same grade? Russ asked Ed. "That's wizzity-wizzity-wrong!" Al giggled and batted his eyelashes, putting a finger to his mouth. "I won't be a problem!!" "Gawd," Ed muttered. "Hiiii----------i, Edward!!" Winry walked over in her high heels and kissed Ed and Al on the cheek. "Kiss, kiss!" "Run like heck!" Ed screamed. The three ran to see what class they were in. "Golly gee willikers!" Al yelled. He pulled his pants up, making sure they were over his belly button, and buttoned up all the buttons on his shirt. "I have Mr. Hughes' homeroom!!" "So do we!" said Ed and Russel. They got their text books and walked down the hall. Al smelled the books. "Ahh...hello, math! Good morning science! Howdy, Social Studies!" He hugged them. "My wunnerful, wunnerful friends! You're all I'll ever need!!" Russel poked Ed's side. "Are you sizzly-sure you two are related?" "No." They entered the room, sliding into the three nearest seats. "Yay! We're sitting next to each other!" Al said to Ed. "Knowledge buddies!" He started scooting his butt in the seat. "Ah, don't you just love that just-came-into-the-classroom-and-sat-down-in-the-chair feel to these chairs?" He squealed. A man waltzed in and turned to the class. "I am Mr. Hughes. But you can call me Mr. Hughes." "I like the other way better," Al said. He pulled something out of his back pocket and put it on Mr. Hughes' desk. "Apple for teacher." "Gasp! Why, thank you, young man!" He handed Al a badge that said "Official Teacher's Pet". "Now I will get all the ladies!" Al went back to his seat. "Okay, I will now call roll." Mr. Hughes got on the floor and started whistling. "Here, roll! C'mere, boy! Good roll!" He found the roll under Russ's seat. "Now I'll see who's here. Russel Tringham?" "Hizzity-here!" "Alphonse Elric?" "Present and accounted for!" "Edward Elric?" Mr. Hughes heard a sqeak. "Edward?" He heard the sqeak again. So he got out his ginormous magnifying glass and looked at desk #3. "Oh, there you are! You're so small I couldn't see you." "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT HE COULD FIT IN A JAR AND BE SENT TO AFRICA AND PUT IN A TESTING LAB TO BE TESTED FOR SOME KIND OF SHORT DISEASE!?!?" Ed screamed. Mr. Hughes stared. "......wanna see some pictures of my daughter? Come on, look! Look!" He shoved pictures of Elicia in Ed's face. "Gettum away!" "She's turning three today!" Al giggled. "Wowee wow wow! She sure is cute! Mr. Hughes shoved the pictures in Al's face. "Look! She's beautiful! BEAUTIFUL!!" He started to get rabies. "But, no...everyone says she isn't important! No one cares. Well, I'll show them...I'll show them all!!" He roared and jumped out the window. "Look at her! LOOK AT HER!!!!" He slapped a picturein everybody's face. "Ah! Mommy, it burns!" "............okey, dokey artichokeys!" Al squeaked. He jumped up and waddled to the front of the room. "A---------s official Teacher's Pet, I will now take charge of this classroom." He giggled and fluttered his eyelashes (at the same time). "Let's read a book!" The bell rang and everyone shot out of the room. "Well, golly gizzards! I Think it's time for music!" Al got his books and skipped gaily down the hall. Ed and Russ peeked out of the locker. "Is he gone, E-to the-D?" "Yeah," said Ed. They got out and pimp-walked to gym while someone played "Candy Shop" in the background. (Gym) "We have to...undress?" Ed asked. "Yes," said Coach Hawkeye. "In...front of everyone?" "Yes, Edward." "AND take a shower?" "Uh-huh." "In...front of everyone?" "YES!" "Oh....in front of everyone?" Russel pulled Ed into the locker room. "Yo, gettin' dressed is off the shizzle fo rizzle dope bomb hite!" The girls rolled they eyes--I mean, THEIR eyes. (locker room) Ed gawked. "You...wear briefs?" Russ nodded, then posed. "Keepin' it real." Ed still had his clothes on. "Why ain't you changing clothes, dawg?" "I forgot my clothes." Al popped out of a locker and handed Ed his clothes. "I ironed them just for you, big brother! Cause I love you." He popped back in...then came out again. "And...just in case you...thought so...I didn't mean that in a gay way." He disappeared again.Ed gulped. "B-but I'm allergic to being naked in front of twenty other guys!" "HALF-naked." Ed hid behind Russel. "I-is anyone looking?" "G-G-G-G-G-G-Unit!" (outside) Okay, now you will run laps." said Coach Hawkeye. "Whoop! There it is!" "RUN! Run, you worthless little monkeys!" Coach Hawkeye pulled out a gun and shot at Russel and Ed's feet." "This is NOT off the shizzle fo rizzle!" Russ screamed. "I heard-----that!" Suddenly, there was a bright light in the doorway. "Gasp!" said all the girls. "It's the hottest 10th grader alive!" The hottest 10th grader alive walked into the gym. "Who dat be?" Russel asked (still running). "Gasp!" said Ed. "It's my arch nemesis, --wait." He stopped. "What's your name again?" "I'm Envy....cause all the guys envy my ability to get ALL the ladies!" Al popped out of nowhere. "But...I thought I got all the ladies..." "I don't think we've met before," Envy told Ed. "Oh, my name's Ed.....It's my arch nemesis, Envy!!" "Who told you to stop running, you maggots!? Run!" Envy walked out. "Yo, Ed-ward! Why'd he come in here anyways?" "Beats me. My legs hurt. I wonder how Al's doing..." >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> <=3 - The arrows!!! Hehe...Okay, I know that I made every single character OOC, but hey. The price I pay for fame (pfft). It may suck a little right now, but you HAVE to read until the next chapter (oh, you're gonna hate me for what I do to Al and....wait, I'm gonna give away the secret!). Well, I'll add the third chapter later....C'mon! wrote tha dang thing at 10:30 at night after Bo-bo-bo-bobo-bo-bo (uh....yeah...I actually do watch that show -.-' Go DON PATCH!). Gimme a break! (of your Kit-Kat bar) Okay. Luv ya. Bye.