Chapter 1 - The Eyes of Truth

Disclaimer: This are a bunch of stuff tha have been eating
me up for a while; i've always seen things that others refuse
to see because to some it's better to be blind than facing
the truth. This are all mine.

WARNING: If you're sensibly religious, please, don't whine.
The truth can sometimes be very ugly.


The Eyes of Truth
by: Lady-O

* If men go out to the streets without bathing for months,
comb their hair, brushed their teeth, dressed in rags, and
smelling like hell, is very probably that they'll always
find some stoopid woman that fall in love with them.
If a woman does the same, men would call the police and
say that a mental patient is on the lose.

* If men get migraines, flue, cancer, aids, body hair, or
any other decease, is very possible women get the same.
If women got their period or got pregnant, why is it
impossible that men suffer the same thing?

* When a man farts, he'll celebrate; when a woman farts,
she'll try to hide it by blaming it on somebody else.

* When women marry all they want is somebody to pay the
bills; when men marry all they want is somebody to do their
laundry, cook their meals, attend them when sick, obey them,
breed their kids, walk their dog, entertain their fotbol
friends, help them when they can't find a shoe, clean the
house, bring some money home and give them sex.

* If a woman has flat chest, they can solve it going for
implants to make the men happy; to make women happy, men
should do the same incrementing permanently their jewels
instead of wasting money on a temporal viagra.

* If your parents twack you at some time and people see
it as right, why do people see it wrong when we twack them
back?

* If neighbors get amused by talking about others,why do
they get angry when others talk about them?

* If men see it right when two women embrace, why do women
see it wrong when two men do the same?

* If Adam and Eve only had Cain and Abel for kids, how did
they repoblated the earth? (Incest anyone?)

* When men pick their noses in public, they do it carelessly;
when women pick theirs, they have to look everywhere to see
if no one else is looking to do it.

* If Jesus was dead for three days and then he resurrected
and walked among us, does this means that he's a zombie?

* If men mostly need women to get laid instead of loving
them as a partner, why do they bother to marry them instead
of getting themselves a hooker? They are a lot cheapper.

* If mucus is so sticky and difficult to get rid of, why
don't we use it as super glue?

* If you got to get high to have fun on a party; then that
party it's probably boring as hell.

* Why didn't jesus got a job like his stepfather's and became
a carpenter instead of sitting on a rock telling people some
wacky stories in exchange for free meals?
Hey, it's was easier than to work his a$$ off like the rest
of us. (Does the term 'lazy bumb' ring a bell?)

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Me: Don't complain people; i say what others are afraid to, if you
don't like it, well boo-hoo!

The Fans: What got into her?

Ozzie: Probably her period.

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