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Chapter 1 - Introducing the Zeroes

Here is my parody of Sonic Heroes, starring the X-Men! This is a game crossover because it was the only category I could find that had the crossover option. Well, the X-Men DID have a couple games, so I guess it works... I hope...

Chapter 1 - Introducing the Zeroes

Chapter 1 - Introducing the Zeroes
X-Men Zeroes by CharleneXavier

Note: Sonic the Hedgehog belongs to SEGA. X-Men belongs to Marvel.

Chapter 1: Introducing the Zeroes!

Somewhere, in a desert...

"€œWOOHOO!!!"€ cried a brown male Fox with two tails and dressed in some black and yellow leather superhero suit, as he sped through the desert on an Extreme Gear board. His blue eyes held great anticipation, and his ears were pushed back by the sheer force. Apparently, this is what this dude did in his free time.
Anyway, this Fox, if he were still human ( or mutant, to be politically correct), could easily be recognized as Wolverine. However, since he's currently Mobian, no one would ever figure it out. But I just told you, so now you know.
All of a sudden, a purple biplane flew down beside Wolverine, carrying two Hedgehogs: A female orange one in a brown superhero suit and a male gray one in a black superhero suit and with a visor over his eyes. This would be Jean and Cyclops.
"Wolverine! Cyclops and I just got a letter from Eggman and Sinister!" Jean cried. Cyclops merely nodded and focused on flying the plane. "€œWell then, let me see the letter, Jean."€ Wolverine prompted. Jean pulled a HUGE scroll out of nowhere and threw it to Wolverine, hitting him with a satisfying smack.
Wolverine regained his balance on his board and opened the scroll, seeing Eggman and Sinister. "Greetings, X-Men Zeroes! As you may have already guessed, Sinister and I have built the ultimate weapon -oof!" He was pushed off the 'screen' and Sinister continued, "And with it, we shall rule both the Mobian and mutant worlds!"
Eggman then pushed Sinister off the screen and china could be heard shattering. "You have three days until the weapon is unleashed!" he cried. Sinister pushed him off the screen again. "Come and stop us if you dare..."€ he said in a sinister voice ( oh, the irony). Then he and Eggman both engaged in maniacal laughter.
Wolverine, Jean, and Cyclops all stared at the scroll as the images of Eggman and Sinister disappeared. Then, a computerized voice said, "€œThis has been an Ancient Scroll tele-message. Message will self-destruct in three... two... one."


For those of you who aren't aware, we've just introduced Team Wolverine.

Somewhere, in one of Sinister's labs...

A blue female Chameleon dressed in some kind of spy outfit slid right under a door as it closed, clearing it with ease. She got up and walked to a locked door. "Let's see..."€ she murmured typing the word 'Marauder' as the password. The door opened and the Chameleon chuckled, "€œSinister never learns, does he?" Now, I'm sure you're wondering who she is, right? Well, meet the Mobian Mystique!
Walking into the room, Mystique could see a large stasis capsule with Eggman's symbol on it in the center. Walking to the controls, she typed Eggman's typical password 'Maria' and the capsule opened revealing an old, silvery Fox with two tails and in some black outfit with a purple cape and a red helmet. Mystique gasped as his blue-gray eyes made themselves known. 'Magneto?' she thought.
All of a sudden, a yellow Echidna dressed in some weird outfit I can't explain 'cause I forgot what it was, tackled Magneto and both Mobians crashed into the wall. Magneto wiggled his way out of the Echidna's hold and countered the attack with a Tail Swipe, sending him flying back. Magneto then focused his power on some nearby guns and pointed them at the Echidna. "Move and I won't hesitate to let these babies go nuts."€ he threatened.
Mystique couldn't take this anymore and she pulled out a huge Piko Piko Hammer. "€œSTOP IT YOU TWO!!!" she screamed at the top of her lungs, slamming the hammer into the metal floor and knocking the males off-balance. The guns landed on the ground with satisfying cracking noises. The two then stared at the Chameleon in surprise.
"€œWhat are you doing with that hammer?"€ Magneto asked. Mystique immediately hid the hammer and said, "€œDon't you read the newspapers?! These kind of hammers circulate all over the spy underworld! I just kept one in case I ever needed it!"

"€œOkay. But just for the record, I was in stasis for awhile. I can't read newspapers."

Mystique face-palmed in frustration. Shrugging it off, she said, "Okay, let's stop fighting for awhile and explain our problems to one another like reasonable Mobians."


Mystique allowed a devious grin to crease upon her lips. She turned to the Echidna, whom through the discussion found out was named Sabretooth. "So lemme get this straight, you're upset 'cause Eggman and Sinister locked you up in here to guard Magneto when you feel you should help conquer the planet, right?" she asked. Sabretooth nodded, but didn't say anything.
Mystique then turned to Magneto, who was busy sulking. "€œAnd as for you... You can't remember anything, can you?"€ she asked. The Fox merely pinned his ears back in annoyance. Mystique grunted. "€œYou boys aren't very talkative, are you?" she taunted. Sabretooth and Magneto seemed to ignore her very existence.
Mystique grabbed both by their shoulders and pulled them close to her. "Okay, we all have a common enemy here, right?"€ she asked. "€œEggman and Sinister will pay for doubting me!"€ Sabretooth snarled. "œI just want to regain my memories," Magneto mused, "€œAnd I believe Eggman and Sinister know who I am..."
Mystique chuckled and placed Magneto's paw on Sabretooth's, then placed her own on the former's. "€œOh yeah baby!"€ she cried, "This makes us a team!"€

Well, now that we've introduced Team Acolyte, let's move on.

Somewhere, at a beach...

A white female Swallow dressed in some black superhero suit examined the picture in her hand. Suddenly, the wind caught it and blew it out of her hand. A nearby brown female Bat with white streaks in her fur and dressed in a green/yellow outfit flew after it, screaming, "€œWait! Come back clue! You're our only lead!"€
After flying for a couple seconds, the Bat grabbed the picture and flew back down to the Swallow. "€œPlease Storm, be more careful with our only clue..."€ she grimaced. "€œDon't worry your little head, Rogue!"€ Storm cried, "€œIt's safe with me!" The wind caught it again.


Rogue flew after the picture. A blue male Raccoon dressed in some gray outfit with a cape and carrying a metal pole walked over to Storm. "€œPoor Rogue, you never let her rest, do you?"€ he asked. "€œWhat do you mean, Gambit?"€ Storm asked.

"€œThe wind caught the picture again, darling."€

Storm finally noticed the picture was no longer in her feathery paw. "Oops..."€ she grimaced. All of a sudden, Rogue came crashing onto the dock, looking singed. She glared at Storm and growled, "€œI despise you..."€ Storm was about to take the picture, when Gambit suddenly took it. "€œNot a chance, darling. The picture stays with moi."€ he told her.

"Thank you! There's no way I'm reentering the atmosphere again!"€

Rogue proceeded to dust herself off while Gambit examined the picture, which depicted Chaos and some strange robot. "So this is who took Iceman?"€ Rogue asked, pointing to the robot. "€œAye, darling."€ Gambit replied, putting the picture in his pocket, "œAlso, let's not forget Bernie and Angel."€ Upon hearing Bernie's name mentioned, Storm burst into tears.
"œPoor weather flower, she misses her Chao."€ Gambit mused. Suddenly, Storm got all serious. "€œOkay Rogue and Gambit!"€ she cried, "€œLet's hunt down that mechanical monstrosity!"€ She attempted to pull her Piko Piko Hammer out of nowhere, but soon discovered it was gone. "€œOh dearie dear, someone went and stole Storm's hammer!" Gambit cried, "€œNot nice!"
"Well, we better get going. C'mon hon!" cried Rogue, taking to the skies. "œRight behind you, darling!"€ Gambit called after her, slamming his pole into the ground and flying upward repeatedly. Storm noticed and flew after them clumsily.

Now, we've just introduced Team Twister. Only one more team of Zeroes to go!

Somewhere, in a very cruddy apartment building...

A gray male Echidna dressed in a black outfit sat in his chair idly, absolutely bored out of his entire existence. A black female Cat wearing a brown outfit leaned against a locker, playing on a DS. All of a sudden, the two heard a female outside scream, "Colossus! Shadowcat! WE GOT WORK!!!" The door suddenly burst into flames and a very giddy orange Rabbit in a purple outfit flew in.
"What is it, Jubilee?" Shadowcat asked. "€œWork! Didn't ya hear me?!"€ the very jubilant Jubilee cried. She then flew to Colossus and successfully knocked him off his chair. "Lookie lookie!"€ she screamed, handing Colossus the package. He examined it carefully, as if he expected it to be a bomb that would blow them sky high if he opened it.
"C'mon! Open, open, open!"€ Jubilee squealed. "€œShadowcat..."€ Colossus started, but the tangible feline was way ahead of him. She grabbed the bubbly Rabbit and held her back. Colossus opened the package and found a walkie talkie with a 'Push me!' sticker on the talk button. Cautiously, Colossus went to push the button....
A scream of pain could be heard and Colossus turned to see Shadowcat jumping up and down, holding onto her right shin. He also saw Jubilee wasn't in the pained Cat's grasp anymore. Almost immediately, he came face-to-face with Jubilee. "€œC'mon ya big scaredy-echidna!"€ she cried, slamming the button. "€œNooooooooo!" Colossus cried, terror covering his features.
"€œHello, you have just contacted Mysterious Person. Mysterious Person will pick up soon. Thank you for your patience."€ said a computerized voice ( which, oddly enough, was the same one that told Team Wolverine the message would self-destruct). Don't worry, this message won't self-destruct ( or will it?)
"Hello? Is this Team Colossal?"€ asked an obviously distorted voice. "œYes.... Yes, it is."€ Colossus answered shakily.

"Excellent. I have a couple jobs for you, and I can pay handsomely."

"€œWell, I don't know. We're not used to taking a job for someone we don-"€

Colossus was pushed off his chair again ( he did get back on it) and Jubilee cried, "We'll take the job! Really!"€ Shadowcat muttered something about company policy, but nobody cares about her. "€œYou have my thanks, Super-Annoying-Girl." said the voice, "Now, here's your first mission..."

To be continued...


Comments (2)

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me-someone on October 6, 2009, 8:32:13 AM

me-someone on
me-someonewell it is just the beginning... Can't wait for the next chapter! but try not to hurry to think about the jokes. I'm not saying that this has bad jokes: it has good ones (I luv the colossal part :3) but I tell you about the time because if we're in a rush we can't do things right!!!

SO BE SLOW (not soooo slooooow) AND STEADY!!! ^v^


CharleneXavier on October 6, 2009, 12:20:36 PM

CharleneXavier on
CharleneXavierThanks. I'm going to take my time because I need to play the game to get scenes and then think of something funny to say about them. Then there's the problem with the quotation marks ( if it's still there).