Chapter 7 - Gwaine, Lancelot, and Their Wii
Submitted December 27, 2011 Updated December 27, 2011 Status Complete | A strange man from the year 2010 has arrived in Camelot, selling strange and wonderful things, like cell phones, computers, televisions...and books about sparkling vampires? Inspired by Merlin Children in Need 2009. Crack!fic
Category:
Television » - Other TV Show not listed |
Chapter 7 - Gwaine, Lancelot, and Their Wii
Chapter 7 - Gwaine, Lancelot, and Their Wii
Gwaine and Lancelot were the fifth to succumb to the newfound technology.
They had each bought cell phones from Rosco on their first trip to his market stall but that was out of mere necessity. They knew that all the knights had been required to invest in phones so that they could keep in contact at all times. Granted, they weren't knights yet – as Uther was still king Gwaine refused to be a knight for him regardless of whether his father was a noble and Lancelot was a commoner and unable to become a knight under Uther's reign – but they knew that when the time was right, when Arthur was king and turned Camelot into the just land it was meant to be, they would be knighted. And so they had opted to buy phones so that they would be prepared when the time came. Plus they liked to prank call Arthur, offering him a discount on sparkles and fake vampire fangs for Gwen's pleasure.
Both of them had noticed something on their first trip to Rosco's market that had caught their eye and lingered in their minds ever since. When they discovered that they coveted the same item, they decided that they would pool the rest of their money together and make a joint purchase. After all, the Wii gaming system was not cheap.
They had somehow managed to convince Gaius to let them have the use of his giant screen television during the few hours every day that nothing worth watching was on and Gaius begrudgingly went on his rounds – sadly, with the introduction of technology did not come perfect health. With Rosco's help (the salesman grinning like a Cheshire cat the whole time, slightly unnerving Lancelot), they hooked the lean, black machine up to Gaius's TV and learned how to use the remotes to create their own Miis (little cartoonish versions of themselves) to use during game play. As an added bonus, Rosco threw in four games: Wii Sports, Wii Sports Resort, Mario, and Guitar Hero.
And the battle commenced.
o.O
"That does not look like you," Lancelot scoffed, frowning intently at the screen as Gwaine moved his remote around, creating his little Mii. Gwaine's avatar was tall and thin, with a green Mohawk and squinty oriental eyes and a casual smirk, wearing a bright purple shirt. The little bouncy character moved around the main Mii room, bumping randomly into walls and meandering into Lancelot's Mii, which, despite its unrealistic appearance, succeeded in looking quite similar to its creator.
"So?" Gwaine snorted, laughing as his Mii barreled across the length of the screen and bumped into Lancelot's Mii. Lancelot's creation was tall, had short black hair, big black eyes, a warm smile, and wore red. Lancelot had dubbed it Lancelot, wanting to be true to real life. Gwaine's Mii's name was G-Man the Epic. "That's the fun of the game. You can create a whole new identity, be whoever or whatever you want, eh?"
Lancelot rolled his eyes a bit impatiently. "If that's the case, may I say that although it looks nothing like you, it's still stumbling around like a drunk."
Gwaine grinned. "Thank you."
Lancelot chose to ignore Gwaine's retort and instead popped Wii Sports Resort into the game system. "Why don't we settle this over a game of table tennis, my friend?"
Gwaine grinned cheekily. "Bring it on."
o.O
It was a few days after Merlin's strange encounter with Gwen and the few times he had run across her since, she had been smiling and happy once more although a hint of sadness lingered in her eyes. The last time he had seen her passing by, he had stopped her, smiling warmly at her, pleased with her transformation from sad to happy. "Gwen… it's good to see that you've gotten over those books."
Gwen chuckled almost patronizingly. "Over them? Please Merlin. There's only one thing that I'm over. And although it was a difficult decision to make, I feel so much better now. After all, a man that isn't brave enough to sparkle for me isn't the man I thought he was, right?"
Merlin gaped at her. "What are you talking about, Gwen?"
She smiled somewhat forlornly at Merlin but then her countenance brightened up. "Arthur, of course. We had a talk. I told him about what an amazing man Edward Cullen is, and offered to help him become more like him so that our relationship would be like the one Edward and Bella have…"
Merlin rolled his eyes. "You mean the one where Edward tells Bella how to live her life and she does exactly what he says, when he says it, how he says it, and without any of her own personal preferences considered?"
Gwen nodded. "Yeah. Isn't it a beautiful relationship?"
Merlin shook his head as the rest of what Gwen had said sunk in. "Wait – are you saying that you ended your relationship with Arthur over a book?" He felt a wave of panic smash through his defenses as he realized that Rosco's merchandise was affecting more than just the daily lives of the people of Camelot – it was destroying long-term relationships as well.
Gwen looked at Merlin like he was someone to be pitied. "Merlin, I don't expect you to understand. But I'll remind you that it is my life and it's really none of your business."
Merlin had nodded curtly and moved on his way. He was going to go and see Gwaine. He hoped that his fun-loving friend would have some clever idea of how to set things straight.
o.O
Gwaine hadn't been in his room, but there had been a note on the door that had read – "In Gaius's chambers. Be back later."
Merlin frowned, hoping that Gaius hadn't managed to suck Gwaine into watching those soap operas and Doctor What, or whatever that show was called, but why else would he be in Gaius's chambers? Unless he was hurt or ill, but the note left no indication of that. His heart feeling a bit heavy, he turned and hurried toward his guardian's and his rooms.
He had been expecting – although at the same time, dreading – to see Gwaine and Gaius both staring at the screen, but the what he witnessed upon arriving at the court physician's chambers was completely unexpected and quite frankly, a bit scary. Gaius was not in sight but Lancelot had joined Gwaine in… well, whatever it was they were doing.
Both were facing the TV, but instead of sitting and watching like zombies, they were jumping up and down, swinging strange black remote-type things around, trash talking each other and bantering like there was no tomorrow. Merlin wondered if they had completely lost their minds. And then he walked further into the room to see that on the screen of the television, strange little bubbly people were bobbing up and down, wielding paddles of some kind, hitting a ball back and forth across a net on a table with lines drawn on it.
When the two soon-to-be knights saw their friends, they pushed a button and the screen paused. Grinning from ear to ear, Gwaine ran over to Merlin. "Merlin – we've been hoping you'd show up! This is the most amazing thing that has ever been invented – EVER!"
Merlin eyed the screen suspiciously. "Have you guys gone mad? You're dancing around Gaius's chambers, acting like lunatics! And what is that thing?"
"A Wii," Lancelot answered. "It's a gaming system – you can play all sorts of games and it's like you're actually doing them. We were playing a game called ping pong, and I was kicking Gwaine's butt."
Merlin stared at the screen for a moment. "Gwaine… why do you have green hair?"
Lancelot smirked. "Thank you, Merlin."
Gwaine scoffed, "Because it's cool."
"No," Merlin argued. "None of this is cool. The whole kingdom is being taken in by Rosco's stuff and every single person I go to has already become addicted something. First Uther, then Gaius, and Arthur, and even Gwen! Don't you people see what's happening to Camelot?"
Merlin jumped as a loud screech of a foreign kind of music cut him off. Indignant, he faced his friends to find that they had lost interest in his rant and had taken out two black devices shaped similar to instruments Merlin had seen, with colorful buttons going down the handle. They were now pushing the buttons frantically, music blaring every time their fingertips connected with one of the keys.
Gwaine tossed his shoulder-length hair as he played the instrument and Lancelot glanced from the screen long enough to mutter, "Show off."
"Hey, if you've got the rock-star look, flaunt it," Gwaine retorted merrily.
The crowd around the strange characters on the stage on the game was going nuts as the numbers – their scores, apparently – rocketed up. The logo at the top of the screen said: Guitar Hero.
Merlin gave up, throwing his hands up in the air. "Forget it," he groaned, stomping to his room and slamming the door behind him. Sadly, the door was thin and flimsy and offered no protection from the blaring, wild music coming from the Wii game.
Clamping his hands over his ears, Merlin tried and failed not to hear the scream of the guitar and the pumped up voices singing: I-I-I wanna rock and roll all ni-ight, and party every day! Yeah, I-I-I wanna rock and roll all ni-ight!
Merlin vowed that if the next person he went to was also absorbed in this untrustworthy, soul-sucking technology, he and Rosco would have a little chat. At this rate, Merlin could do magic in front of Uther or Cenred's army could flatten Camelot and no one would notice.
This was getting ridiculous.
They had each bought cell phones from Rosco on their first trip to his market stall but that was out of mere necessity. They knew that all the knights had been required to invest in phones so that they could keep in contact at all times. Granted, they weren't knights yet – as Uther was still king Gwaine refused to be a knight for him regardless of whether his father was a noble and Lancelot was a commoner and unable to become a knight under Uther's reign – but they knew that when the time was right, when Arthur was king and turned Camelot into the just land it was meant to be, they would be knighted. And so they had opted to buy phones so that they would be prepared when the time came. Plus they liked to prank call Arthur, offering him a discount on sparkles and fake vampire fangs for Gwen's pleasure.
Both of them had noticed something on their first trip to Rosco's market that had caught their eye and lingered in their minds ever since. When they discovered that they coveted the same item, they decided that they would pool the rest of their money together and make a joint purchase. After all, the Wii gaming system was not cheap.
They had somehow managed to convince Gaius to let them have the use of his giant screen television during the few hours every day that nothing worth watching was on and Gaius begrudgingly went on his rounds – sadly, with the introduction of technology did not come perfect health. With Rosco's help (the salesman grinning like a Cheshire cat the whole time, slightly unnerving Lancelot), they hooked the lean, black machine up to Gaius's TV and learned how to use the remotes to create their own Miis (little cartoonish versions of themselves) to use during game play. As an added bonus, Rosco threw in four games: Wii Sports, Wii Sports Resort, Mario, and Guitar Hero.
And the battle commenced.
o.O
"That does not look like you," Lancelot scoffed, frowning intently at the screen as Gwaine moved his remote around, creating his little Mii. Gwaine's avatar was tall and thin, with a green Mohawk and squinty oriental eyes and a casual smirk, wearing a bright purple shirt. The little bouncy character moved around the main Mii room, bumping randomly into walls and meandering into Lancelot's Mii, which, despite its unrealistic appearance, succeeded in looking quite similar to its creator.
"So?" Gwaine snorted, laughing as his Mii barreled across the length of the screen and bumped into Lancelot's Mii. Lancelot's creation was tall, had short black hair, big black eyes, a warm smile, and wore red. Lancelot had dubbed it Lancelot, wanting to be true to real life. Gwaine's Mii's name was G-Man the Epic. "That's the fun of the game. You can create a whole new identity, be whoever or whatever you want, eh?"
Lancelot rolled his eyes a bit impatiently. "If that's the case, may I say that although it looks nothing like you, it's still stumbling around like a drunk."
Gwaine grinned. "Thank you."
Lancelot chose to ignore Gwaine's retort and instead popped Wii Sports Resort into the game system. "Why don't we settle this over a game of table tennis, my friend?"
Gwaine grinned cheekily. "Bring it on."
o.O
It was a few days after Merlin's strange encounter with Gwen and the few times he had run across her since, she had been smiling and happy once more although a hint of sadness lingered in her eyes. The last time he had seen her passing by, he had stopped her, smiling warmly at her, pleased with her transformation from sad to happy. "Gwen… it's good to see that you've gotten over those books."
Gwen chuckled almost patronizingly. "Over them? Please Merlin. There's only one thing that I'm over. And although it was a difficult decision to make, I feel so much better now. After all, a man that isn't brave enough to sparkle for me isn't the man I thought he was, right?"
Merlin gaped at her. "What are you talking about, Gwen?"
She smiled somewhat forlornly at Merlin but then her countenance brightened up. "Arthur, of course. We had a talk. I told him about what an amazing man Edward Cullen is, and offered to help him become more like him so that our relationship would be like the one Edward and Bella have…"
Merlin rolled his eyes. "You mean the one where Edward tells Bella how to live her life and she does exactly what he says, when he says it, how he says it, and without any of her own personal preferences considered?"
Gwen nodded. "Yeah. Isn't it a beautiful relationship?"
Merlin shook his head as the rest of what Gwen had said sunk in. "Wait – are you saying that you ended your relationship with Arthur over a book?" He felt a wave of panic smash through his defenses as he realized that Rosco's merchandise was affecting more than just the daily lives of the people of Camelot – it was destroying long-term relationships as well.
Gwen looked at Merlin like he was someone to be pitied. "Merlin, I don't expect you to understand. But I'll remind you that it is my life and it's really none of your business."
Merlin had nodded curtly and moved on his way. He was going to go and see Gwaine. He hoped that his fun-loving friend would have some clever idea of how to set things straight.
o.O
Gwaine hadn't been in his room, but there had been a note on the door that had read – "In Gaius's chambers. Be back later."
Merlin frowned, hoping that Gaius hadn't managed to suck Gwaine into watching those soap operas and Doctor What, or whatever that show was called, but why else would he be in Gaius's chambers? Unless he was hurt or ill, but the note left no indication of that. His heart feeling a bit heavy, he turned and hurried toward his guardian's and his rooms.
He had been expecting – although at the same time, dreading – to see Gwaine and Gaius both staring at the screen, but the what he witnessed upon arriving at the court physician's chambers was completely unexpected and quite frankly, a bit scary. Gaius was not in sight but Lancelot had joined Gwaine in… well, whatever it was they were doing.
Both were facing the TV, but instead of sitting and watching like zombies, they were jumping up and down, swinging strange black remote-type things around, trash talking each other and bantering like there was no tomorrow. Merlin wondered if they had completely lost their minds. And then he walked further into the room to see that on the screen of the television, strange little bubbly people were bobbing up and down, wielding paddles of some kind, hitting a ball back and forth across a net on a table with lines drawn on it.
When the two soon-to-be knights saw their friends, they pushed a button and the screen paused. Grinning from ear to ear, Gwaine ran over to Merlin. "Merlin – we've been hoping you'd show up! This is the most amazing thing that has ever been invented – EVER!"
Merlin eyed the screen suspiciously. "Have you guys gone mad? You're dancing around Gaius's chambers, acting like lunatics! And what is that thing?"
"A Wii," Lancelot answered. "It's a gaming system – you can play all sorts of games and it's like you're actually doing them. We were playing a game called ping pong, and I was kicking Gwaine's butt."
Merlin stared at the screen for a moment. "Gwaine… why do you have green hair?"
Lancelot smirked. "Thank you, Merlin."
Gwaine scoffed, "Because it's cool."
"No," Merlin argued. "None of this is cool. The whole kingdom is being taken in by Rosco's stuff and every single person I go to has already become addicted something. First Uther, then Gaius, and Arthur, and even Gwen! Don't you people see what's happening to Camelot?"
Merlin jumped as a loud screech of a foreign kind of music cut him off. Indignant, he faced his friends to find that they had lost interest in his rant and had taken out two black devices shaped similar to instruments Merlin had seen, with colorful buttons going down the handle. They were now pushing the buttons frantically, music blaring every time their fingertips connected with one of the keys.
Gwaine tossed his shoulder-length hair as he played the instrument and Lancelot glanced from the screen long enough to mutter, "Show off."
"Hey, if you've got the rock-star look, flaunt it," Gwaine retorted merrily.
The crowd around the strange characters on the stage on the game was going nuts as the numbers – their scores, apparently – rocketed up. The logo at the top of the screen said: Guitar Hero.
Merlin gave up, throwing his hands up in the air. "Forget it," he groaned, stomping to his room and slamming the door behind him. Sadly, the door was thin and flimsy and offered no protection from the blaring, wild music coming from the Wii game.
Clamping his hands over his ears, Merlin tried and failed not to hear the scream of the guitar and the pumped up voices singing: I-I-I wanna rock and roll all ni-ight, and party every day! Yeah, I-I-I wanna rock and roll all ni-ight!
Merlin vowed that if the next person he went to was also absorbed in this untrustworthy, soul-sucking technology, he and Rosco would have a little chat. At this rate, Merlin could do magic in front of Uther or Cenred's army could flatten Camelot and no one would notice.
This was getting ridiculous.
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