Chapter 1 - Episode One

That Sonic Show!

Eric Forman - Sonic
Michael Kelso - Vector
Fez - Tails
Steven Hyde - Shadow
Jackie Burkhart- Rouge
Donna Pinciotti- Amy
Bob Pinciotti- Eggman
Red Forman- Knuckles
Kitty Forman- Tikal
Leo - Big



Scene of a top view of Sonic, Shadow, Tails, and Vector sitting n a 4 man circle. The scene fades into Vector's face.

Vector: Hey guys. (eyes half closed)

Camera turns to Sonic.

Sonic:... Vector, you've been saying that for the past 10 minutes.

Camera turns back to Vector.

Vector: *eyes fully closed, mouth agape*

Camera turns to Tails.

Tails: You know guys, I never noticed how much I like porn and candy. (gasps) Porn and candy at the same time!

Camera turns to Shadow.

Shadow: Haha... there's this car, that runs on water man! WATER!!

Camera turns to Sonic.

Sonic: I feel like I've heard that before, like from this old show...

Camera turns to Shadow.

Shadow:... IT RUNS ON WATER, MAN!!!

Camera turns to Tails.

Tails: Porn and candy. (giggles)

Camera turns to Vector.

Vector: (Asleep)

Camera turns to Sonic.

Sonic:.... Vector is stupid.

Camera turns to Shadow.

Shadow:... There's this car-

Camera turns to Tails.

Tails: Por-

Camera skips Vector and goes to Sonic.

Sonic: Am I the only sane one?


----------Scene switches to Knuckles and Tikal talking in the kitchen.-------------


Knuckles: (Sitting in chair with his head cupped in one hand) Oh, Tikal, I really don’t like that kind of thing.

Tikal: Oh, Knuckles, it only two days.

Knuckles: But that’s two days of singing Christmas carols all across Wisconsin and I just don’t want to do that!

Tikal: Well, I already signed you up for the Happy Cheerers Trip.

Knuckles: Well, I don’t want to go.

Tikal: . . . (Starts moving fast as she fixes dinner, showing signs of slight annoyance) Okay, Knuckles, if you don’t want to go that’s just FRIGGIN’ fine!

Knuckles:(Sighs) . . . Tikal . . .

Tikal: No, no. You just sit here, like a lump on the log, and watch your football and I'll just go . . . Alone, maybe some man will look at me and -

Knuckles: (Stands up and moves his arm, signaling he gave in) Okay, okay! Fine. I’ll go with you.

Tikal: Really?

Knuckles: Really. (Walks over to Tikal) But what about Sonic? We can’t leave that dumb @$$ alone.

Tikal: I’m sure everything will be fine. (Grabs his jacket collar) He’s a good boy.

Knuckles: (Looks at her strangely . . . You know we’re talking about Sonic, right? Sonic Forman.

Tikal: Oh, Knuckles.

Knuckles: No - no. I’m serious you leave him here, alone. He’s going to wind up breaking something or throw some wild party.

Tikal: I think he grew up, some.

Knuckles: (Sighs) Fine. We’ll leave him alone. But if I come home and find something broke, or an over drugged woman laying naked on the couch; I’m going to shove my foot so far up his @$$, that all the other foots will be complimenting him as my foot’s new wig!

------------------Scene switches Sonic, Tails, Shadow and Vector hanging around the basement-----------------

All: . . .

Vector: (Snapping into a thought) You know what would be awesome?!

Sonic: What, Kelso?

Vector: What if men had boobs?! Think about it! You could play with your own boobs all day long.

Shadow: Kelso, that is redundant!

Vector: Nuh-uh! You could play with your boobs all day and never need a girlfriend!

Tails: Yes. All day I could play with them. How nice . . . How nice! Hey, then I wouldn’t have to buy the magazines!

Vector: Yeah! See? Tails is with me!

Shadow: You know, man, this is coming from the guys who don’t have a girlfriend.

Sonic: Yeah, I know.

Vector: Screw you, Hyde! I done with Rouge first! So, you’re getting my sloppy seconds!

Shadow stares at Vector and Vector stares at Shadow for three seconds. Shadow lunges at Vector and tackles him to the ground, directly behind a chair that is out of the way of the camera. The sounds of a struggle can be heard, a large punch is made and Vector screams, “Ah! My eye!” Shadow stands up and smile while Vector stands holding his eye.

Tails: Oh! That’ll teach him. (Throws a handful of M&Ms in his mouth)

Knuckles: (Shouting from upstairs) Sonic! Get up here!

Sonic: (Standing up) I’ll be right back, guys.

Knuckles: (Shouting again) And tell Archie and Jughead to stop fighting in the basement before I shove my foot up their @$$!

Sonic: (Looks at Shadow and Vector) Uhh . . . Quit fighting or dad’s gonna shove his foot up your @$$ . . . (Walks upstairs)

--------------Switches to Sonic walking to his parents in the kitchen----------------

Sonic: Yeah, dad?

Knuckles: Sit down! (Sonic sits in a chair by the table) Me and your mom are leaving for two days, to go to some kind of . . . Christmas caroling . . . Thing.

Sonic: You? Christmas caroling?!

Knuckles: Shut up.

Sonic: (Laughing hard) This is SO great! Man, I wish I could video tape it! You singing Christmas carols! I would watch that over and over!

Knuckles: (Mocking laughter) Yeah? Well, I’m about to kick you in the @$$! I wish I could video tape IT so I can watch IT over and over!

Sonic: . . .

Knuckles: . . .

Sonic: . . . That’s not funny.

Knuckles: Oh, it’s funny.

Sonic: . . .

Knuckles: (Smiles) Anyhow, the point is we’re leaving you here, alone. So -

Sonic: You mean I get the house to myself?!

Knuckles: Don’t get too excited, smart @$$! I don’t want any kind of insanity going on around here, no wild parties, massive drug use, or having frigging jug head here! You hear me? No partying!

Sonic: Dad - dad, don’t worry. I wouldn’t break your trust. (Slaps Knuckles Forman on the shoulder) There will be NO party!

----------------Switches to scene, Sonic running down the basement and stops close to the bottom---------------

Sonic: (To all, happy look on his face) Guys! We’re gonna have a party!

---------------Scene Changes with Sonic jumping up and down with a colorful background below---------------

-------------------Scene goes back to Sonic, Shadow, Vector, and Tails in the basement----------------------------

Shadow: (To Sonic) Alright, Forman, so what exactly are you planning on for the party?

Sonic: I don’t know; music, food, beer . . .

Shadow: Keg?

Sonic: Oh, yeah. Keg, defiantly, keg.

Shadow: (Writing on paper) One large keg.

Door opens, Amy and Rouge walks in.

Amy: (To all) Hey, what’s going on?

Shadow: Forman’s throwing a party.

Amy: (To Sonic) Cool.

Sonic: Yeah, my parents will be out for two days.

Rouge sits beside Shadow.

Rouge: (Rubbing Shadow’s shoulder) Can’t wait to party with you.

Shadow: (Not paying attention) Yeah. (To Sonic) Forman, how much you willing to spend on this keg?

Tails: My cousin once stole a keg from a frat party. (Looks down) God rest his soul. (Looks at floor) Ooh, M&M! (Grabs candy from floor and eats it)

Vector: Yeah . . . Keg’s rule!

Sonic: I don’t know Hyde, 50 bucks?

Shadow: Half Keg, coming up.

Sounds of Tikal running down stairs, Shadow hides paper under him.

Tikal: Okay, Sonic, Knuckles and I are leaving.

Sonic: Okay, mom, bye.

Tikal: Remember, no partying. Bye!

Everyone: Bye, Mrs. Forman. (Tail’s distinctly can be heard saying, “I love you!”)

Everyone stares at Tails.

Tails: What? (Everyone still stares at him) She’s a nice lady. (Continue staring) Fine, I’m leaving. Good day!

Sonic: Whatever, man.

Tails: I said, “Good day!”

Tails walks out door.

Sonic: So . . . What music we got?

Tails rushes back in and grabs a bag suckers.

Tails: Now, good day!

Tails rushes back outside.

Shadow: Well, we got some Lynyrd Skynyrd,

Tails runs back in and stands in the doorway.

Tails: I don’t care what you think you sons of doges, I’m staying!

Tails flops on the chair and stares at them.

Everyone smiles.

--------------------Scene switches to Knuckles and Tikal at the Happy Cheerers Headquarters---------------------

Host: Welcome, you must be the Forman!

Knuckles: (Shakes hand with host) Regrettably.

Tikal: (Cuts in) Oh, he’s just joking. (Stares at Knuckles evilly)

Knuckles: (Sighs) Yep, that’s me. Always joking.

Host: Hahahaha! You are a delight, Mr. Forman. Well, I’ll let you get acquainted with the other Happy Cheerers!

Knuckles: (Puts on fake smile) Sure, it’ll be a Happy time!

Host: Happy, indeed, hahahaha! (Walks away)

Knuckles: (Stops smiling, whispers to Tikal) I REALLY don’t want to be here!

Tikal: (Whispers also) Knuckles, you’re gonna sing and you’re gonna love it! Or you can start cooking for yourself!

Knuckles: (Still whispering) Grr . . . Fine!

Couple walks up to the Forman’s.

Stan: Hi! We’re Harold’s! I’m Stan and this is my lovely wife, Nina!

Knuckles: (Shakes Stan’s hand and puts on fakes smile) We’re the Forman’s. I’m Knuckles and this is my wife Tikal.

Tikal: Nice to meet you. My husband is so enthusiastic about singing tonight. Aren’t you, Knuckles?

Knuckles: . . . You know me, Tikal? Always singing Christmas songs in the shower.

Stan: Me too! Which is your favorite?

Knuckles: Favorite? Well, uh? The one about . . . Uh . . . Santa Clause . . .

Tikal: (Buts in) Oh, Knuckles just loves all the songs equally, HAHAHAHA!

Knuckles: That is NOT a lie, Tikal.

Stan: (Smiles) Wow! We’re gonna tell everone about how much you love Christmas songs, Mr. Forman. They might let you take the lead! Wouldn’t that be a great honor?

Knuckles: (Obvious fake smile) Oh, boy, wouldn’t it?

Harold’s leave the Forman’s.

Knuckles: (Shakes head) Oh, crap!

-------------Scene Changes with Knuckles yelling at the Camera with a colorful background below-------------

------------Scene switches to the party. Rouge and Amy sitting on the couch in the living room, talking--------

Rouge: Shadow’s been a lot better than Vector as a boyfriend, he’s a lot smarter too. But he just doesn’t seem to be opening up as much. You think my breast might be too small.

Amy: (Rolls eyes) Your breast are fine, Rouge. It’s just the way Hyde is. He’s not like Kelso.

Rouge: Yeah. I guess you’re right. Good thing he’s not like Vector. You know, they say opposites attract. I guess that’s true! Me and Shadow are together. You and Sonic are together.

Amy: (Puzzled look) How are me and Sonic opposite?

Rouge: Well, Sonic’s a little skinny wimp and you’re a strong lumberjack swinging a hammer around!

Amy punches Rouge in the shoulder.

Rouge: Ow! (Grabs her arm) That only proves my point.

Amy punches her again.

Rouge: Will you stop that?

Amy: Apologize! (Holding fist up)

Rouge: Alright, alright! Sorry! Damn, like fist of steel!

Tails runs in wearing a Speedo, he slides in front of the girls.

Tails: (To the girls) Hello, ladies!

Amy: (To Tails, acting angry, trying to retain a smile) Tails? What the hell?

Tails: What the hell, what? (Doing a hero pose)

Rouge: You’re wearing a Speedo!

Tails: Oh, this? I’m just trying to look sexy. Aren’t I sexy?

Amy: (Laughs) Yeah, Tails. You’re looking sexy.

Tails: Thank you, Amy. Rouge?

Rouge: No, offense. But you’re foreign. I’m not into foreigners.

Tails: Drat! Swindled again!

Amy: Poor Tails.

Tails: (Picks up a Playboy magazine) You told me I could win over the girl of my dreams with a Speedo! You lied! (Opens up the magazine) I forgive you. (Looks at the girls) Don’t judge me! (Runs off)

Amy: Tails - Tails - Tails.

--------------------Scene switches to Vector in the bathroom, flushing stuff down the toilet---------------------

Camera points a Vector’s face.

Vector: (Throws a G.I. Joe doll in the toilet) Flush! (Pushes handle and watches it go down the toilet) Sweet!

Shadow walks in.

Shadow: What’re doing?

Vector: Flushing stuff down the toilet, it’s awesome!

Shadow: That’s so childish!

Vector: Oh, yeah? (Flushes sunglasses down the toilet)

Shadow: (Smiles) Move.

Vector moves out of the way. Shadow throws in a couple of batteries and flushes them.

Shadow: This is so cool! Go grab some stuff, Kelso!

Vector: Okay! (Runs out)

--------------------Scene switches to Knuckles and Tikal singing with Carolers at someone’s doorstep----------

Carolers: (Knuckles standing at the back and is hardly even mouthing the words) We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Man sits in the house and yells.

Man: You guys suck almost as much as the Packers do!

Knuckles eyes widen.

Host: Well, gang, looks like this one is a Grinch. Let’s try some where’s else.

Stan: (To Knuckles) Well, this one just doesn’t appreciate the fine arts of Caroling, huh?

Knuckle: (Staring at the door) No. No he doesn’t.

Carolers leave, Knuckles stands still and Tikal was about to continue with the gang but notices Knuckles didn’t budge.

Tikal: Knuckles. They’re moving on.

Knuckles: He insulted the Packers, Tikal!

Tikal: No, please, Knuckles. Forget it.

Knuckles: No, Tikal. He needs to learn a lesson! (To the man) Hey, dumb @$$! Don’t insult the Packers again!

Man: (To Knuckles) The Packers suck, man!

Knuckles: Yeah, well, someone’s gonna need to suck my foot out your @$$, when I shove it up there!

Man: Like to see you try, old man!

Knuckles starts walking over to the house.

Tikal: Honey! Don’t! (Knuckles gets up the last few steps) Oh, dear!

--------------------------------Scene switches back to Shadow and Vector---------------------------------

Shadow: Remote?

Vector: (Hands shadow remote) Check.

Shadow: (Flushes remote) Bills?

Vector: (Hands bills to Shadow) Check.

Shadow: (Flushes bills) Baseball?

Vector: (Hands baseball) Check!

Shadow: (Flushes baseball) Awesome! (Toilet begins to overflow) Oh, crap!

Sonic walks in.

Sonic: Hey, guys. What’s going on?

Shadow: Well, Forman . . .

Sonic: (Notices toilet) What the hell happen to the toilet?!

Vector: Hyde was flushing stuff down it!

Shadow punches Vector in the shoulder.

Vector: I was telling not too, but he didn’t listen.

Shadow punches him again, harder.

Vector: Ow! What’s with the hitting?!

Shadow: You keep trying to pass it off on me. No. I don’t like that.

Vector: Your mom liked it! BURN!!!

Shadow punches him a third time.

Vector: OW!

Sonic: Guys, the toilet!

Shadow: Well, Forman, it’s your problem, now.

Sonic: Nah, see, if you don’t fix it, I’ll tell everyone about the time you watch Old Yeller and -

Shadow: (Cuts him off) You swear you’d never speak of that!

Sonic: Well, I will!

Shadow: Fine. Kelso, get the plunger.

Vector: Why should I?

Shadow punches him again.

Vector: Alright, damn!

Vector hands Shadow the plunger.

Shadow: This should only take a minute. (Begins plunging)

-------------------Scene switches to Tikal and Knuckles driving home-----------------------

Tikal: Well, Knuckles, you got us kicked out of the Happy Cheerers.

Knuckles: I’m sorry, Tikal, but you know how I feel about the Packers!

Tikal: Yes, Knuckles I know. But you didn’t have to literally kick the guy in the keester.

Knuckles: Yeah, (laughs) I shoved my foot up his @$$, alright. (Holds up his foot and only a suck on it) I boot got stuck up there!

Tikal: Oh, lord!

----------------------Scene switches back to Sonic, Vector and Shadow---------------------

Half an hour has passed.

Shadow: (Still plunging, growing tired) Wow. It must be that baseball!

Sonic: You guys flushed a baseball down the toilet?!

Vector: Yeah, it was AWESOME!

Sonic: Hyde?

Shadow punches Vector in the shoulder again.

Vector: DAMNIT! In the same spot!

Big walks in the bathroom.

Big: What’s up, man?

Sonic: (Rolls eyes) Oh, it’s the hippy.

Shadow: Hey, Big. Wait, you were a plumber at one time, right?

Big: Yeah, dude. Or was it my cousin, Lenny? Yeah, it was me, I think . . .

Shadow: Well, can you fix this toilet?

Big: (Looks at the toilet) Oh, dudes, what happened?

Sonic: These two idiots were flushing things down it!

Big: (To Shadow) Hyde, man, I thought you knew better! A toilet is really delicate!

Shadow: . . . I’m sorry, Big.

Big: (Sighs) Give me some time, I should have it fixed, man.

Everyone but big leaves.

---------------------------Scene switches to Sonic, Knuckles and Vector exiting the bathroom----------------------

Shadow: Well, Big should fix it and everything should be cool.

Sonic: Yeah, I hope you’re right.

Shadow: Yeah. Yeah.

A loud pop can be heard in the bathroom. The boys run back in and find Big standing in front of the toilet as water shoots out of it like a fountain.

Sonic: (To Big) Holy, crap! What happened?!

Big: (To Sonic) I don’t know, man.

Sonic: What do you mean you don’t know?

Amy, Rouge and Tails runs into the bathroom.

Amy: We heard an explosion, what’s goin (Sees toilet) - what happen to your toilet.

Sonic: Everyone stop! Okay, we got two days until my parents come back. I think I have enough cash to buy another toilet. Okay, uh -

Tikal: (Shouting from the living room) Sonic! We came home early!

Sonic: Damn! (To the gang) Hide! (Starts shoving everyone in the bathroom)

Rouge: Ew! Toilet water’s spraying everywhere!

Sonic: I know! (Kicks Rouge in there) (Sees his parents) Hiya folks! How you doing?

Knuckles: (Smiling) Well, I actually had some fun.

Sonic: (Notices one shoes was missing on Knuckles) Where’s your other boot?

Knuckles: I kicked it up some guys @$$ and it got stuck, go figure. And now I need to use the bathroom.

Knuckles starts opening the door.

Sonic: No-no-no-no! (Knuckles opens) I’m so grounded!

Knuckles: (Sees the toilet and the gang, get‘s angry) What the f*uck happened to the toilet?! Why the f*ck are all these people here? I thought I said no G*d damn parties!!!

Sonic: See about the toilet. Uh, Kelso and Hyde were flushing stuff down it and it over flooded.

Knuckles: Over flooded, huh? Well, dumb @$$ my foot is about to overflow your @$$!

Sonic: Yeah, I know.

Knuckles: How the f*ck did you get the toilet to start spraying like that.

Big: (Interrupts) Well, that me, man. I put a really strong Chinese firecracker down there. It’s illegal in 40 states, man. I was trying to fix it.

Knuckles: You let the hippy try to fix the toilet?

Sonic: He said he used to be a plumber!

Big: (To Sonic) No way, man. That was my cousin, Lenny.

Knuckles: (Shakes head, yells) Everyone out!

Everyone leaves and Sonic tries. Knuckles grabs him.

Knuckles: (Squinting eyes) Not you!

Sonic: I’m in trouble, aren’t I?

Knuckles: Big time!


---------------------------Credits---------------------------

360 Circle Opening: Link_The_Hedgehog_Magician
Rest of the story: Esshole

------------------------------After Credits----------------

In other 360 circle.

Camera starts with Sonic.

Sonic: Well, my dad was really pissed off at me.

Shifts to Shadow.

Shadow: Yeah, Forman, I could hear him yelling at you.

Shifts to Tails.

Tails: (Holding peeps) I just love peeps!

Shifts back to Shadow.

Shadow: Hey, Forman, so what is he making you do?

Shifts back to Sonic.

Sonic: Well, I have to get a job and pay him weekly for the toilet.

Shifts to Shadow.

Shadow: So you got off pretty easy.

Shifts to Tails.

Tails: PEEP! Heheheh. That’s fun to say . . . Peeps!

Shifts to Sonic, skipping Shadow.

Sonic: He’s making me work at some nursing home for a while.

Shifts to Shadow.

Shadow: Yeah, you better watchout for that old grouchy lady that’s always there. I hear they once had one at a nursing home one time and she bit off one the helpers finger.

Shifts to Tails.

Tails: PEEP! (Bites a peep) Tastes good too!

Shifts to Shadow again.

Shadow: (Looks directly in front of himself) Hey, what do you make of this?

Shifts past Tails and Shows Big.

Big: I don’t know, man. But this is some good stuff though.

Shifts past Tails and to Shadow and Shadow just nods.

--------------End--------------

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