Chapter 2 - The Singer. Pt. 2
Submitted May 31, 2010 Updated January 8, 2011 Status Incomplete | Descripted events of my life that had insightful value that I felt was appropriate to share.
Category:
Real People |
Chapter 2 - The Singer. Pt. 2
Chapter 2 - The Singer. Pt. 2
People found my last story to be interesting, and I found it to be so as well. The happening and times that happened were indeed very aweing. However, things aren't always as they may appear. There are always 2 sides to every story, though this story has turned into a sphere of problems.
The girl, sophia, told me information months later after the first said event in Pt. 1. We began talking more, and got into deeper subjects. I really was curious to why she was going to kill herself, what made her stop, etc. All of the basic things. But what she never told me was one thing, the full story. Basically just mending me away slowly with information.
Though the drummer I introduced her to started dating, it wasn't jealousy, but determination that kept me attracted to her. She has been till this day one of the only people who ever seemed to understand my form of logic, my mind set, how I think in general so perfectly. It was so rare for me to find someone so aspiring like her that I couldn't let her go. So ignoring my friend dating her, I resumed trying to get her attention. She knew she liked the drummer in her mind, but I knew she shouldn't be with him. It seemed conceited but I knew I was better for her, and I tried my best to persuade her my way.
My efforts slowly began to stop however, I was getting close to giving up when one night she texted me saying she wanted to meet up with me at the park. I met her at the apartment in my town she was staying at (she didn't live in our town, she was staying a friends apartment roughly 3 streets away from my house) and the awkward silence spoke for itself. We knew what both of us were thinking, we knew we liked eachother. Though we were afraid to make the next move; though it didn't last for long. We began to make-out, then moved to the park and went farther than that there even. Then moving into a darker spot to not be caught, and spontaneously had sex infact.
She told me before that night that she did like me, that she knew I would be better. But she couldn't get over the love she had with our drummer. He was a younger, immature 15 year old with very bad anger problems. He was even abusive in their relationship, though she saw past it all somehow. The two of them to her had something that me and her could have, but she gave up on me just to avoid the conflict. Very saddening it was to me, its a very painful and deep thought. Knowing the person YOU truly do feel you love, with more passion than you've ever felt, the most passion you've felt for someone even after almost 2 years have passed. Won't love you back, because you introduced her to one of your band members.
Though we never expected to get famous as a band, we mostly wanted to grow as musicians and bond more as friends. Being in a band is a very affiliated thing with long-term friendship and commitment.
The singer and I both are on good levels still, considering only that we were both always the mature people of the band. The drummer and singer always just slacked off because of them dating. They played occasionally, though they never tried to improve, and as they started dating they started to stop talking to us as much as well. Our friendship slowly died as me, the singer, and generally everyone in the band started to become sick and tired of something else someone was doing. The singer hated the dick-head attitude of the drummer, acting like a total asshole just because he got a girlfriend. I hated the drummer for very similar reasons, and I began to strongly hate the singer for abandoning me after just spontaneously having sex and finally going through to me about our feelings for eachother.
But the singer and drummer both hated us because they were idiots. They thought we hated them just because they were together. They would just not get it out of their minds that we were calling them a "Forbidden love" trying to act as if we were the story book enemies and hated them for all the wrong reasons. Never realizing how their own relationship had gotten to their heads. Though the singer was very smart, just as smart as I am, and in many ways smarter. I respected her knowledge more than anyone, and I could not get over her because of it. This respect started to fade away as she began to just disrespect me, constantly for all the literally wrong reasons. For reasons that logically weren't even correct.
Sadly, these griefings and bullcrap love tales coming from other people have still yet to stop. They still don't stop. If we post on their comment on Facebook, they say we're jealous of their love. These two are the kind of people you see in Twilight, though honestly, even worst. They're like the emo couples, but even at that, far worst. They're the kind of people who post the bullcrap love gooey things. Like how the emo stereotype says all the deep death things, etc. They say the bull crap love things that they THINK is deep. While its obvious that if you observe it in 5 seconds that you could point out every mistake with them. i.e "Your love is the light that guides me, it is the bullcrap to my bullshoot. You are my bullcrap."
The singer may seem innocent as it appears as I describe, but in reality she is not. She actually did drugs, LOTS of drugs, back when we had sex actually as well. Specifically to point out, heroin. Her knowledge and everything I fell for in her I still do believe is there, but the thing I will not remain to believe is that she really loves the drummer. After observing them, I think its just the kissy romance that has kept her attracted. She has mentally got no control of it. Back to when we first met, she always had control problems. She could not keep secrets, or lie. She told the drummer that she liked me. Which is when it all began to fall apart.
But I never knew she did the drugs until maybe a month ago at the most. Which really does bring some regrets of this entire thing.
This entire story is just to inform you all, that women (not all women obviously), at young ages can easily fall for someone just after a simple kiss because of the first experience of the love. The rush of it, the overall feeling of importance, and unknown experience of relationships. They tend to think that their first love is their only love because of how they've never loved someone before. Its just their first impression upon something that the media and generally the population highlight so much makes them think that it's not likely to happen. When its not the case, or to me personally at least its not. Your first love, even the first person you kiss, you have sex with. The level of the relationship isn't what matters. I'm not going to say that its all about personallity, because its not. I personally just can't love someone if I don't find them attracting. I can fall in love with them, but I will never be able to really be with them mentally myself. Though, think about it more. Its not about the pleasure, its not only about the person, the personallity, or just anything. But there's one thing you should be all about when your dating someone.
And that's if they're really who YOU'RE looking for. Not who's found you, though that can happen obviously. Are they right for you? Are they the one you're looking for, or can you do better? Don't always feel that you'll be declined or that they're your last chance. -- Don't turn them down instantly if you think it might work, you don't have to find someone perfect, but if you don't set some standards you'll never truly find someone you love in my opinion. You'll just be living a relationship that will be on a path of self-destruction sooner or later.
The girl, sophia, told me information months later after the first said event in Pt. 1. We began talking more, and got into deeper subjects. I really was curious to why she was going to kill herself, what made her stop, etc. All of the basic things. But what she never told me was one thing, the full story. Basically just mending me away slowly with information.
Though the drummer I introduced her to started dating, it wasn't jealousy, but determination that kept me attracted to her. She has been till this day one of the only people who ever seemed to understand my form of logic, my mind set, how I think in general so perfectly. It was so rare for me to find someone so aspiring like her that I couldn't let her go. So ignoring my friend dating her, I resumed trying to get her attention. She knew she liked the drummer in her mind, but I knew she shouldn't be with him. It seemed conceited but I knew I was better for her, and I tried my best to persuade her my way.
My efforts slowly began to stop however, I was getting close to giving up when one night she texted me saying she wanted to meet up with me at the park. I met her at the apartment in my town she was staying at (she didn't live in our town, she was staying a friends apartment roughly 3 streets away from my house) and the awkward silence spoke for itself. We knew what both of us were thinking, we knew we liked eachother. Though we were afraid to make the next move; though it didn't last for long. We began to make-out, then moved to the park and went farther than that there even. Then moving into a darker spot to not be caught, and spontaneously had sex infact.
She told me before that night that she did like me, that she knew I would be better. But she couldn't get over the love she had with our drummer. He was a younger, immature 15 year old with very bad anger problems. He was even abusive in their relationship, though she saw past it all somehow. The two of them to her had something that me and her could have, but she gave up on me just to avoid the conflict. Very saddening it was to me, its a very painful and deep thought. Knowing the person YOU truly do feel you love, with more passion than you've ever felt, the most passion you've felt for someone even after almost 2 years have passed. Won't love you back, because you introduced her to one of your band members.
Though we never expected to get famous as a band, we mostly wanted to grow as musicians and bond more as friends. Being in a band is a very affiliated thing with long-term friendship and commitment.
The singer and I both are on good levels still, considering only that we were both always the mature people of the band. The drummer and singer always just slacked off because of them dating. They played occasionally, though they never tried to improve, and as they started dating they started to stop talking to us as much as well. Our friendship slowly died as me, the singer, and generally everyone in the band started to become sick and tired of something else someone was doing. The singer hated the dick-head attitude of the drummer, acting like a total asshole just because he got a girlfriend. I hated the drummer for very similar reasons, and I began to strongly hate the singer for abandoning me after just spontaneously having sex and finally going through to me about our feelings for eachother.
But the singer and drummer both hated us because they were idiots. They thought we hated them just because they were together. They would just not get it out of their minds that we were calling them a "Forbidden love" trying to act as if we were the story book enemies and hated them for all the wrong reasons. Never realizing how their own relationship had gotten to their heads. Though the singer was very smart, just as smart as I am, and in many ways smarter. I respected her knowledge more than anyone, and I could not get over her because of it. This respect started to fade away as she began to just disrespect me, constantly for all the literally wrong reasons. For reasons that logically weren't even correct.
Sadly, these griefings and bullcrap love tales coming from other people have still yet to stop. They still don't stop. If we post on their comment on Facebook, they say we're jealous of their love. These two are the kind of people you see in Twilight, though honestly, even worst. They're like the emo couples, but even at that, far worst. They're the kind of people who post the bullcrap love gooey things. Like how the emo stereotype says all the deep death things, etc. They say the bull crap love things that they THINK is deep. While its obvious that if you observe it in 5 seconds that you could point out every mistake with them. i.e "Your love is the light that guides me, it is the bullcrap to my bullshoot. You are my bullcrap."
The singer may seem innocent as it appears as I describe, but in reality she is not. She actually did drugs, LOTS of drugs, back when we had sex actually as well. Specifically to point out, heroin. Her knowledge and everything I fell for in her I still do believe is there, but the thing I will not remain to believe is that she really loves the drummer. After observing them, I think its just the kissy romance that has kept her attracted. She has mentally got no control of it. Back to when we first met, she always had control problems. She could not keep secrets, or lie. She told the drummer that she liked me. Which is when it all began to fall apart.
But I never knew she did the drugs until maybe a month ago at the most. Which really does bring some regrets of this entire thing.
This entire story is just to inform you all, that women (not all women obviously), at young ages can easily fall for someone just after a simple kiss because of the first experience of the love. The rush of it, the overall feeling of importance, and unknown experience of relationships. They tend to think that their first love is their only love because of how they've never loved someone before. Its just their first impression upon something that the media and generally the population highlight so much makes them think that it's not likely to happen. When its not the case, or to me personally at least its not. Your first love, even the first person you kiss, you have sex with. The level of the relationship isn't what matters. I'm not going to say that its all about personallity, because its not. I personally just can't love someone if I don't find them attracting. I can fall in love with them, but I will never be able to really be with them mentally myself. Though, think about it more. Its not about the pleasure, its not only about the person, the personallity, or just anything. But there's one thing you should be all about when your dating someone.
And that's if they're really who YOU'RE looking for. Not who's found you, though that can happen obviously. Are they right for you? Are they the one you're looking for, or can you do better? Don't always feel that you'll be declined or that they're your last chance. -- Don't turn them down instantly if you think it might work, you don't have to find someone perfect, but if you don't set some standards you'll never truly find someone you love in my opinion. You'll just be living a relationship that will be on a path of self-destruction sooner or later.
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