Chapter 1 - A poem

Nothing makes the Ragdoll sadder

than to see

several moronic nerds get madder and madder

at a cartoon character named Sally.

"She's a slut!"

They cry, rant, and whine,

"I want to kill her! Now what?!"

They proclaim proudly, convinced they have a spine.

All the while drawing and writing crappy smut

where their favourite characters are portrayed as having an IQ of nine.

And what remains a mystery to the Ragdoll

While all this is going on

Is how fans are unaware of the downfall

of Sonic at the hands of these morons.

Would Sonic, Tails, and Shadow ever get in a drunken brawl?

Does the sight of blue hedgehogs really give Knuckles a hard on?

And the girls, none of them are empty brained whores

who'll sleep with the guys at the drop of a hat

No matter what you hear in the rumors,

Not Sally, Amy, Mina, or even Rouge the bat.

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