Chapter 1 - MGA

*Ring-Ring*

Snake: "Ugh, I hate this suit"

Colonel: "Hey, what's up Snake?"

Snake: "Ahh, can I take off this suit?"

Colonel: "Yeah what'eva, but it's pretty frackin' cool..."

Mei Ling: "Hello Solid Snake!"

Snake: "Oh my god hottness, I wanna bang you!!!"

Mei Ling: "Oh, I can't believe I'm being hit on by the famous solid snake"

Snake: "Ok, shut up"

*Scene of Snake stripping....Holy shoot!*

Liquid Snake: "I'm going to get in to this Hind now"

*Ring-Ring*

Colonel: "Hey Snake, check it, go sneak that shoot"

Snake: "Okay"

Soldier: "Who's footprints are these?"

Egoraptor: What Tha frack! I didn't expect that!"

*Alarm*

Egoraptor: "frack!"

*GAME OVER*

Colonel: "Snake, yo Snake? SNNAAAAA...."

Egoraptor: "Shut tha frack up!!!"

Colonel: "Sorry gee, I thought Snake was dead"

Snake: "Didn't even break a sweat"

*kills dog by sweating*

Snake: "shoot! I killed a dog by sweating."

*Ring-Ring*

Master Miller: "Hello Snake, it's been awhile. Do you remember me?"

Snake: "Liquid?"

Master Miller: "No this is McDonnell Miller, your old buddy"

Snake: "Who? Are you from Snakes Revenge?"

Master Miller: "No Snake, don't you remem...."

Snake: "Why is there a helicopter in the background?"

Master Miller: "It's my stomach, I'm hungry"

Snake: "Hungry for wooormms?"

Master Miller: "No, hungry for wooords"

*Both Laugh*

Snake: "Shut up!"

*Snake Likes Penis*

*Air Duct sequence!!Okay? Good"

*Ring-Ring*

Snake: "Shut up for Christ sake, I know how to climb a ladder, Jesus ow my ear!"

Jesus: "Sorry Bra"

*Jesus heals ear*

Snake: "Thanks Jesus"

Jesus: "It's cool"

*Another Air duct sequence!!!!YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*

*Sees bikini girl*

Snake: "Whoa, Awesome"

*Sees DARPA Chief*

Snake: "Hey, are you takin' a dump?"

DARPA Chief: "Heell Yeaah"

Snake: "So, tell me about Metal Gear"

DARPA Chief: "You knew!?" *Farts*

Snake: "The game is fracking called Metal Gear Solid!!!!!"

*Farts*

DARPA Chief: Yeah..*Farts*..Ah yeah..*Farts*..Yeah..*Farts*..mhm, Yeah..*Farts*..Mhm mh mmmh"

DARPA Chief: "Yeah well, they're makin' a new Metal Gear and stuff, and I talked. I gave them the password..*Farts*..Yeah..*Farts*..Ah Yeah"

DARPA Chief: "You know when you have diarrhea but it doesn't hurt when it comes out? It's so satisfyin' man"

Snake: "Gross"

*Shoots DARPA Chief*

*Ring*Ring*

Snake: "Yeah the DARPA Chief died of a heart attack, uh I don't know what happened. Metal Gear, whatever, Meryl's Hott"

Colonel: "She's ma niece"

Snake: "She's still hott asshole"

Meryl: "Get out you loser"

Snake: "Shut up hottness"

Snake: "The safety's on"

*eats gun*

Snake: "You have rookie eyes"

Meryl: "They're transplants"

Snake: "Shut up dog"

*Ring*

Snake: "Stop fracking calling!"

Meryl: "Is that your...?"

Snake: "It's your uncle"

Meryl: "Oh, he's a fag"

*Alarm*

Snake: "Don't just stand there, shoot!"

Meryl: "You fracking ate my gun"

Snake: "Oh"

*throws exploding dead guy*

*BOOM dawg*

Snake: "We gotta go!"

Meryl: I'll go on ahead, look at my @$$"

Snake: "Ok"

*Remember this. This is important*

Snake: "Cool"

Psycho Mantis: "I'm going to be a boss"

Snake: "Am I hallucinating?"

Psycho Mantis: "You like meeeen"

Snake: "You can see into my mind!?"

Psycho Mantis: "No"

Snake: "frack!"

*grenade explodes and a hole in the wall appears*

Soldier: "What was that noise?"

Ocelot: "This gun is the best gun ever"

Snake: "Oh?"

*Cyborg Ninja cuts his arm off*

Cyborg Ninja: "Cool, maybe this'll come in handy for a stupid plot device in the sequel."

Ocelot: "What the hell!? We didn't even fight yet"

*shoots ArmsTech President*

*Ring-Ring*

Snake: "Another heart attack, what the hell is going on?"

Colonel: "Ya bee, that looks like a bullet wound to me"

*shoots colonel*

Snake: "Now to find.....wait, what am I looking for?"

*Ring-Ring*

Snake: "Colonel, how do I contact Meryl?"

Snake: "....Oh, whoops"

*Ring-Ring*

*Mei Ling appears*

Snake: "Never mind, you're too hott"

*5 DAYS LATER*

Egoraptor: "Yeah I don't know what tha frack to do"

Adam: "You have to look at the back of the CD case for Meryl's codec number"

Egoraptor: "Well how tha frack was I supposed to figure that out?"

Adam: "Colonel tells you"

Egoraptor: "Oh, whoops"

Adam: "What?"

Egoraptor: "I killed him"

*Alarm*

*Adam Shoots Egoraptor*

THE END

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