Chapter 1 - Friend of Mine

Summary: Rei x Kai, Kai x Rei. We all know the
pairing is pretty obvious, even in the dubbed kids version.
But what would happen if one of them didn't return that
feeling? Instead of becoming closer, only got more cold??
One-sided Rei x Kai. Some angst feeling.

Disclaimer: I don't own Beyblade or its characters,
but I do own the fiction in itself. I just borrowed the
characters.

Author's Comment: I accept tasteful criticism, but
not bashing. Please keep that in mind. As well, the next
chapter of White Flag should be up within the next few
weeks. I apologize for the delay with that story. If you
haven't already read it, check it out. Thanks, and enjoy
the story!

Warning: Let's see. There's some shounen ai, but not so much
physically. There's angst, and maybe one or two curse words.
Other than that, I suppose it's pretty clean. You've been
warned.

----------------------------------------

My eyes wearily open, as I'm forced to stare that the night that consumes me.

It's late, probably around two in the morning - judging by the moon. Damned moon, it's so bright tonight. It's no wonder I'm awake already. There aren't even any blinds to cover the doorway to the balcony, so I guess I'm stuck with the moonlight in my eyes.

I roll over, trying to fall back asleep.

No luck there.

For so long as he's laying beside me, and I'm turned in that direction, there's just no way I can fall back asleep. Instead, I just lie there, staring at his sleeping face. Ahh, so beautiful.

He's so different when he sleeps. He seems more relaxed; more at peace with himself and with the world. His breathing is steady, not too harsh or too soft. I watch his chest as it rises, filling with air, then descending again; making a steady pattern. That only makes me wonder what he's dreaming - if he's even dreaming at all. I sigh, and trace the light blue triangles that he always paints on his pale face. If only I could tell him; just let him know how I feel ......

No, never. I couldn't do that. What would everyone think? What would my teammates, my best friends think? But most important - what would Kai think?? Would he simply shrug it off, pretending like I never said it? Would he take it much harder, perhaps kick me off the team - breaking my heart even more?

Man, I must be really tired. I'm thinking and worrying myself way too much. So I close my eyes, in hopes of catching more shut eye before the morning comes. All seems to be going well at first, and for a few brief moments, I actually thought I was going to fall back into a restful slumber. But suddenly, Max stirred from across the room causing my eyes to snap right back open again. I grumble, turning the other way.

Moonlight.

I'm frustrated now; I'm either distracted or have the moonlight in my eyes - and I figure I'm not going to be sleeping anytime soon. So, lifting myself quietly out of my side of the bed, I stretch gingerly and rub the bit of sleep out of my eyes. I look down at Kai, who still seems to be sleeping, then turn my gaze to the outside and slowly make my way to the balcony.

It's a beautiful night out - wisps of silver and gold clouds brushing by a full, illuminating moon. I give off a small smile, my thoughts immediately filling with the image of Kai.

"Dammit," I mutter under my breath. "Why...won't you leave me alone?"

I sigh yet again, resting a cheek in my hand as I look over the edge of the balcony. It's been such a long time since I've had time to myself like this. So maybe the lack of sleep is a good thing. We've been so busy lately - what, with another tournament starting up soon, then a special appearance at an amateur tournament somewhere in Canada I believe....heh, not to mention the hardcore training we've been under in the past little while. It's all fun, I mean, I love Beyblading and everything about it. It's just....sometimes a guy would like a little relaxation and time to himself, you know?

I take a breath of fresh, cool air, then let it all out in attempts to relieve a bit of stress.

But Beyblading is only one thing on my mind. My love life isn't exactly working out either. Having fallen for the stoic 'Ice Captain' hasn't proved to be easy. I mean, I've accepted the fact I'm crushing on another guy. So be it, I like a male. Big deal. It's just who that male happens to be. Kai. The cold-hearted bastard who probably never loved a person in his entire life. It definitely shows - and why I'm attracted to him, I'll never know. Love works in mysterious ways, I guess. Wait, did I just think....did I just say....that word? Love?? Hm, there's a first. I never actually considered that word in this situation. Am I in love with him? I don't even think I know the answer to that.

Frankly, I just don't know what to do anymore. People say I have a picture- perfect life. Everything going for me. I'm only seventeen years old and the envy of almost every Beyblader in the world. Truth be told, they don't know anything about me. I still am human - I have my problems, my...uh...secrets, and my needs and urges (some urges being stronger than others). What? I am a teenage guy after all, so sue me.

I hear something rustle behind me, which causes my ears to twitch. Oops, I left the door open. And oops, I suppose I was talking to myself again. I hope I didn't wake anybody up.

I walk quietly to the door and slowly close it. There we go. Don't want anyone waking up, now do we?? My being awake might just raise a few curious questions.

The fluffy clouds are now starting to take over the midnight blue sky. Hmm, it might actually start to rain in a while. That's fine with me - I enjoy listening to the rain. It helps me sleep.

For the next ten minutes or so, I lean against the balcony's railing, starring off into the endless sky. Although it mainly consists of clouds now, my eyes still manage to catch glimpses of those tiny, glittering stars that dwell in the heavens above. I suppose I could make a wish upon a star - but imagine how silly that might sound if someone were listening.

I chuckle to myself. What's the harm in it?? It's not like those wishes actually come true. And besides, it's not like anyone is listening.

Still chuckling, I take a deep breath and say the words almost every child says to the stars when there's something they want....

"Star light, star bright; first star I see tonight - I wish I may, I wish I might....have the wish I make tonight. I wish...."

I stay silent for a moment, thinking of what I would truly want. I'm not really selfish, so it's not like I'd ask for something big. Maybe, if it's not asking too much....

"I wish Kai would know how I felt about him....without actually telling it to his face. All I want is to be close to him; to love him."

I feel my lips curve into a small smile, and then I go back to being silent. I should probably go back in soon. I'm starting to get a bit chilly, and besides, the moon is almost completely hidden. Maybe I can actually get some sleep.

"I never knew you felt that way, Rei..." a sudden voice sounds from behind me. I nearly jump out of my own skin, and turn right straight around to face the voice I was afraid of hearing.

Kai. The icy, hostile bastard.

I can feel my cheeks burning - no, searing with red. Had he heard my silly wish? Dammit, he must have. I know what he just said...my mind just seems to be having a hard time understanding it. And besides, how the hell does that guy always manage to appear without a sound?

"K...Kai...." I whisper, words having failed me. I honestly can't think of anything to say. I guess....in a weird sense, that my wish just came true. Kai did hear how I felt about him, and I didn't tell it straight to his face.

"Shhh..." he beckons with his fingers to his lips. I bite my lower lip, wondering what the hell was coming up next. Stupid, stupid, stupid Rei!! Yeah, I'm mentally scolding myself for even considering making such a stupid wish to begin with. Eep, he's stepping forward now. I can now clearly see his ruby red eyes bearing into mine - seeming to be playing with my very soul. He looks so serious....so....damn good looking.

"You want me, don't you?" He asks, his hands grasping my sides, bringing me away from the railing and closer to him. His grip is tight; his breath is sweet, and warming my face. Myself? My heart is definitely racing - pounding against my chest. My breath is shallow; I'm finding it hard to breathe. What do I say? He's heard the truth thus far...I may as well continue so he gets the right message. And besides, it's not like me to lie.

"Y...yes..." I stammer, my yellow eyes unable to tear themselves away from Kai's beautiful ones. It's like I can see into his soul, even though the waters that are blocking it from view are clouded over and kind of muddy. Oh dammit, I've been holding my breath. He's probably noticed by now.

His lips curve into the smallest, yet clearly visible smile. His left hand moves from my lower back upwards - stroking my back in a somewhat soothing pattern. I can't help myself much longer...I know I'm going to break.

"You want to be with me....and touch me....hold me, perhaps?" Kai whispers, his lips seeming to be coming closer to mine. He's teasing me, I swear it.

And I swear my heart just skipped a beat.

"Yes," I breathe out, the sudden urge to just melt into a bubbling pile of goo becoming much stronger.

"I thought you'd say that..." he responds, bringing his right hand up and placing it on the side of my face. Oh god, please don't let him notice me sweating. I'd die from embarrassment.

He rubs my cheek with the tips of his fingers, his eyes still tearing into mine. I just seriously don't know what to say or do anymore. This moment is everything I've ever wanted. It's like every girl's fantasy with their secret crush...except, well, the obvious. I'm not a girl.

His lips are now officially coming closer to mine. His grasp on my waist with his one hand seems to be getting tighter. Myself? My hands just finished making their way to his waist, and I'm pushing myself as hard as I can forward. Okay Rei, it's now or never. It's the one fairy tale kiss I've wanted for what seems like forever now. I part my lips, seeing as his lips are mere inches from mine. I'm holding my breath again, my eyes drooping down until they finally close. All I can sense is Kai's lips - coming closer...

And closer....

And closer...

...

But my expected kiss never comes.

I look up, and there Kai is. His face pulled away, looking at me in sheer mockery. He's still smiling, but this time, his smile means purposeful deceit and almost satire. I can tell he's laughing at me from the inside, his eyes looking at me as if to say what an idiot I am.

Everything that's been built up within the last few minutes...everything I've ever actually hoped for...

Crushed. Gone. All in vain.

He takes one final look at me, then opens the door to the balcony and heads back inside. The door closes with a small click behind him. He's gone just about as fast as he came.

I'm left alone; just me and my thoughts once again. I lift my head towards the sky, where a tiny splash of water descends from the sky and crashes into my face. Within moments, hundreds more do the same - the clouds finally took over the sky. No more moon, no more stars - nothing.

Why? How? How could I be so stupid? The moment happened all too fast.... I got lost in it, and now have come out with nothing. I look down again, and stare out towards the far away mountains in the darkened distance. My heart feels so heavy now...

Much like the rain. Droplets cascade down my face, and mix in with the tears that have managed to escape my eyes.

"I got my wish, I can't deny that..." I say to myself, taking in a quivering breath of morning air before turning and letting myself back inside. However, a small part of me was left on that balcony. A part which I know I will never get back. And it's all thanks to that one person. That cold-hearted son of a dog that used to be a friend of mine.

--------------------------------------

Okay yes, that wasn't that great. It was just a quick thing that came into my head while listening to In Essence.

Thanks for reading!!

© 2004, Chibi Kai Lover. All rights reserved, dammit!

You are not authorized to comment here. Your must be registered and logged in to comment