Chapter 1 - Episode One

---------------Intro-----------------------

Robotnik: If you have a problem.

Image of Robotnik yelling at a hoodlum.

Robotnik: You can call me!

Several images are played in the next line.

Robotnik: You are the father! You are not the father! You need to have love and understanding! Hey, you don’t bring that trash onto my show!

Image of Man running with a pocketknife toward Robotnik.

Robotnik: Hey! You get off my stage!

Image of Security dragging man off stage.

Man revealing he peeps on women.

Robotnik: *disgusted face* Snooping as usual I see. *shakes head sadly*

Camera closes up on Doctor Robotnik face.

Robotnik: Welcome, to the Doctor Robotnik show.

Camera fades to black.

Audience: Pingas! Pingas! Pingas! Pingas! Pinags!

----------------Greetings------------------

Camera zooms in on the good doctor.

Robotnik: Greetings, world, and welcome to The Doctor Robotnik show. The show where I try to help couples and families solve disputes. Because all they need is love and compassion. Now tonight we have three slots to fill! Tonight we have “O stalker, my stalker” (an image of Sonic running from Amy appears on large screen), “An Open Whore” (an image of Rouge doing a sexy pose for other men, while Knuckles sits there angered appears on the screen) , and “Is she a horrible mother?” (an image of Vanilla yelling at Vector while Vector yells at Vanilla and Creams stands between them, crying).

Camera zooms out a little.

Robotnik: Now, world, I’ll have my first guess after a word from our sponsor.

Fades to commercial.

---------------Commercial----------------

Announcer: Drunken Monkey Beer!

Shows three stickmen standing around one stickman who’s chugging down a keg of Drunken Monkey Beer.

Three stickmen: Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!

Then it shows the one stickman entering a car while the three stickman stand behind it as it takes off.

Three stickmen: Drive! Drive! Drive! Drive! Drive! Drive!

Final scene has the one stickman speeding down the rode, narrowly missing oncoming traffic.

Three stickmen: Wreck! Wreck! Wreck! Wreck! Wreck! Wreck!

One stickman: (Hangs body out of car while steering with left foot, still hauling down the rode) Look, ma! I’m driving with my feet!

Announce: Drunken Monkey Beer - Be the primate you are!


------------Slot 1 - O Stalker My Stalker------------------

Robotnik: Welcome to the Robotnik Show! I'd like to introduce the Blue Blur himself, Sonic the Hedgehog.

Sonic walks out and is greeted by a loud roar of cheers and shouts. Some fan girls try to bum rush the stage, but are stopped by Security. A fan girls head explodes because of Sonic's awesomeness.

Robotnik: Welcome Sonic! Please, have a seat.

Sonic nervously looks around the crowd, and sits down.

Robotnik: Now you asked to be here, Sonic. You didn't want to talk on the phone, or meet me. you emailed. May I ask why?

Sonic: First I want to know... is she here?

Robotnik: Who?

Sonic: (says in an extremely silent whisper) Amy...

Robotnik: Ohh, no. She's not here Sonic.

Sonic: (breaths a sigh of relief) That's great..

Robotnik: (nods) Now tell us.. why are you here?

Sonic: I'm being stalked. Everywhere I go I see....PINK... (whimpers, curling up on chair)

Robotnik: (raises an eyebrow) Pink, you say?

Sonic: (freaks out) AMY!!! SHE WON'T LEAVE ME ALONE!!! (starts to breath rapidly and nervously)

Robotnik: Someone get him some water!

Security walks forward, handing Sonic a glass of water. Sonic downs it quickly.

Sonic: (takes a deep breath) I came here today to talk about Amy's obsessive relationship with me.

Audience: Awwwww...

Sonic: It's not cute!!! She stalks me. She stole my extra set of keys for my house! She comes in at night when I'm sleeping and smells every single one of my clothes!

Robotnik: Sonic, I need to stop you for a moment. We have Amy backstage, now.

Sonic: What?! *whimpers*

Robotnik: Sonic, it's going to be okay. (looks toward audience) Here's what Amy had to say.

Screen shows Amy in front of a black background, various face shots and body shots.

Amy: I don't get why Sonic called me here. Ooh! Is it because he wants to marry me?! If so, that would be soooo romantic! He said it was something serious, so I'm wondering if he meant serious as in good, or as in bad...

Robotnik: Here's Amy!

Amy walks out and is greeted by some cheers and whistles. She walks straight over to Sonic and gives him a kiss on the cheek, before taking a seat closely next to him.

Amy: (looks at Sonic) Soooo.. Sonic. (blushes and giggles) Why'd ya call me out on here?

Sonic: I...

Amy: Yes?

Sonic: Amy... I can't stand you! You always follow me wherever I go! I've told you numerous time, I don't like you! And yet you still think I do!! PLEASE! LEAVE ME ALONE! (He looked at her with anger in his eyes)

Amy: (Gasps)......(slaps the shoot out of Sonic)

Crowd: OOOOH!!! PINGAS! PINGAS! PINGAS! PINGAS! PINGAS!

Amy: (gets furious and takes out her Piko Hammer, lashing out at Sonic)

Sonic: Ahh! (jumps up and backs away)

Robotnik: HEY! You calm down!! How'd you bring that weapon on the premises?! Security, restrain her!

Security guards surround her, as Amy glares at each of them and lashes out with her hammer. They rush her, grabbing her from behind.

Amy: HEY! (hits one of them, knocking them unconscious)

Security guard tackles her to ground.

Amy: GET OFF OF ME!!! (growls, glaring and trying to claw her way toward's Sonic) YOU GAVE ME SIGNS!!!!

Sonic: Eep. (hides behind chair)

Robotnik: YOU!! (points to Amy) CALM DOWN OR I'M KICKING YOUR @$$ OFF MY STAGE!!!!

Audience: OOOOH!!! PINGAS! PINGAS! PINGAS! PINGAS! PINGAS! PINGAS!

Amy: (gets up and gives Sonic a death glare, before returning to her seat)

Robotnik: And you!! (looks at Sonic) STOP cowardly hiding behind that chair and sit down!

Sonic: (gulps, nods and stands sitting back in seat)

Robotnik: Thank you. (turns to crowd) We'll return after a word from our sponsors.

--------------------------Commercial-------------------------

A man with crazy strung out hair, and a wide smile on his face appears on screen

Crazy Carl: HI! I'm Crazy Carl!! Have you ever felt down and out?!

Shows a skinny man, trying to lift weights, but it falls on him

Crazy Carl: WELL!! I have the solution for you!! (shows a green can to the viewers) THIS BEAUTY IS CRAZY JUICE!!!!!! It's loaded and packed with sugar! Sugar!...SUGAR!!!!!!!! (hands it to skinny man) DRINK IT!!!!! NOW!!!!

Skinny man: (takes a drink and suddenly is able to life the weights miraculously) WOW!

Crazy Carl:......SUGAR!!!!!!

Skinny man: THANKS CRAZY CARL!!!!!! (thumbs up, lifting weight with one hand, and a wide smile on his face)

Crazy Carl: It's not me laddie... it's the....SUGAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Announcer: This product contains sugar, and uhh, water?

-----------------Slot 2 - An Open Whore-----------------------

Robotnik: Now, let me introduce my next guest, Knuckles T. Echinda.

Knuckles steps out with a slight angered face. Minimal applause is made to insure his sanity remains.

Robotnik: Welcome, Knuckles.

Knuckles: (Still angered) . . . Thanks . . .

Robotnik: So, you say that your girlfriend, Rouge, has been sleeping with other men?

Knuckles: (Highly angered) YES! (Slams fist on armrest) THAT WHORE!

Robtonik: Woe, calm down. It’s alright, you’ll get through this. We talked to Rouge, earlier, and she had this to say . . .

Screen shows Rouge in front of a building doing different sexual poses while she says the following lines.

Rouge: I don’t understand why Knuckles can’t get a reality check! I’m Rouge The Bat and I WON’T be held down by one man! I’ll frack who I want, when I want and how I want to. I’m a whole lot of woman and I can’t be pleased by just one cock! And if Knuckles can’t respect that, then he should just get his little boy toy out of here and go some where’s else because I don’t plan stopping just for him!

Robotnik: Well, here she is, Rouge The Bat!

Rouge walks out wearing skin-tight, excessively reveling cloths. The audience boos. Rouge walks over to her seat beside Knuckles saying, “Whatever! Whatever!” and flipping off the crowd.

Robotnik: So, Rouge, do you feel bad at all for betraying Knuckles like this?

Rouge: Why should I feel bad? Maybe if he was better in bed I wouldn’t frack all those other guys,

Audience: Oooooooooooooooh!

Knuckles: (To Rouge, angry) You’re a damn whore!

Rouge: I’m not a whore!

Rouge and Knuckles: (Arguing at the same time, most word are uncomprehending)

Robotnik: (To Knuckles and Rouge) Hey! (They continue to argue) HEY! (Still argue) *Yelling* STOP BEING PINGAS AND SHUT UP! (They silence with fear)

Audience: Pingas! Pingas! Pingas! Pingas! Pingas! Pingas!

Robotnik: When you’re on MY show, you’re going to at least ACT like adults, you understand me?!

Audience cheers. Robotnik settles down.

Robotnik: (Takes a deep breath to calm his nerves) Now, Rouge, do you love Knuckles?

Rouge: (Ashamed look on her face) Yeah.

Ronotnik: Well, why are you sleeping around then.

Rouge: It’s uh . . .

Ronotnik: Why are yo -

Rouge: It’s just sex.

Robotnik: What?

Rouge: It’s just sex.

Robotnik: Just sex?

Rouge: Yeah.

Robotnik: You don’t think having sex with multiple partners can be considered a betrayl to Knuckles, your supposed boyfriend?

Rouge: Nah. I love Knuckles and I want to be with Knuckles, but I’m gonna have sex with whoever I please.

Knuckles: And, Doctor, sh-

Robotnik: (Yelling at Knuckles for his disrespect Hey! I’m talking to Rouge! You can speak when I talk to you! But until then, you keep your mouth shut!

Audience cheers.

Robotnik: Now, Rouge, I got this to say. You are in the wrong. You shouldn’t have a boyfriend and sleep around with other men. (To Knuckles) Now, what were you saying.

Knuckles: . . . (Sighs) I was saying that when we go out in public she’ll flirt with any guy near here, even if I’m around. When we’re eating dinner she’ll keep all the men she fracked that day. I even walked into one of the rooms in MY OWN house and found her fracking one of my friends, Shadow, I walked in and they didn’t stop. I can’t keep up with this. Something’s got to be done!

Robotnik: How come you haven’t left her?

Knuckles: I - I love her.

Audience: Awww . . .

Robotnik: Well, we have a guest with us - Shadow The Hedgehog!

Shadow walks out of backstage. Audience boos. Shadows calls them “Pitiful humans.” And sits beside Rouge. Rouge kisses him. Knuckles gives death-stare.

Robotnik: Have you had sex with Rouge, Shadow?

Shadow: Of course.

Robotnik: Where you caught by Knuckles?

Shadow: Yes.

Robotnik: And you didn’t stop when he walked in?

Shadow: Why should we?

Robotnik: You’re having intimate relationships with his girl!

Shadow: His girl? Sorry to say but it’s more like the whole towns girl.

Audience: Ooooooooooooh!

Rouge: (To Shadow) Shut up, you dick!

Knuckles: (To Shadow) Take that back, you bastard!

Robotnik: (To everyone) Quiet, all of you!

Silence.

Robotnik: Okay, Knuckles, Rouge has a few secrets she told us.

Rouge: (On Screen) Knuckles, I have a little secret I want to tell you! You’re 2007 birthday party when you asked me to go with you to bowl with your pals and I didn’t. Well, that’s because I planned on inviting five guys to frack my brains out. We had sex right in the living room and I enjoyed every last minute of it!

Knuckles jumps up in anger,

Knuckles: What?! You dog!

Robotnik: Stop, she has one more secret.

Knuckles turns to the screen.

Rouge: (On screen) Oh, Knux, I got another secret. When you went to your moms funeral in 2008. I invited your friend Tikal over and celebrated your moms death with hot lesbian sex! And it was a lot better than you’ll ever be!

Knuckles: (Stunned) . . . On my moms funeral day . . .

Robotnik: Sit down, Knuckles.

Knuckles sits with a blank stare but could tell he was thinking.

Robotnik: Knuckles we gave Rouge a lie detector test. We asked her a single question. Are you ready?

Knuckles: . . . Yes.

Robotnik: Grabs a manila folder from a security guard. Rouge we asked you, “How many partner have you had sex with in one setting?” You said, “Seven.” The test determined that was a lie. The test revealed that you had sex with over 50 men in one setting for a homemade porn video!

Knuckles stands up in rage grabs a chair and throws it to his side narrowly missing an innocent bystander. He runs into the backstage and throws a punch into the wall, creating a gaping hole. Rouge runs back there and tries to speak.

Knuckles: Shut up, you filthy, fracking whore! I don’t want to hear your mouth! We’re over! You understand? Over!

Rouge runs out of the building crying. Knuckles drops to his knees and Robotnik runs to him and comforts him.

Robotnik’s Voice: When we come back . . .

Image on screen shows Vector yelling at Vanilla.

Robotnik’s Voice: IS she a bad mother? Find out when we return.

----------------Commercial------------------

A fat man, with a five-O-Clock shadow, and a cigar appears on screen, Fat Bill.

Fat Bill: My name is Fat Bill! I want you to come down to Mad Cow Burger! It’s damn good! Made from the most illegal of all beef. So you know it’s tasty!

Show burger being cooked.

Fat Bill: Look at all the sizzling goodness. Why, if you don’t eat it, you may live a long, yet miserable, life!

Goes back to Bill, he holds a very large burger.

Fat Bill: Now, try our 5000 calorie burger, Death On A Bun! This bad boy may last longer than you do!

Announcer: We are not responsible for any health problems to occur! Eat at your own risk!

Fat Bill: Only $5.99. So, come on down Mad Cow Burger and I’ll fry you up something deadly!


----------------Slot 3 - Is She A Bad Mother?--------------

Robotnik: And now for my final guess. He claims that his neighbor is a bad mother and feels he should take the child and raise it! Here he is Vector T. Crocodile!

Vector walks out raising his arms. Some of the audience cheers. Vector sits by the good doctor.

Robotnik: So, Vector, why do you feel Miss Vanilla is a bad mother.

Vector: Well, Doc, I always see that kid wondering around the woods without ANY parental supervision! At night I can hear a party going in on their house, it’s a wonder how the girl is passing in school. And . . . Sometimes she pawns the girl off on me just so she can invite the WHOLE damn town to frack her!

Audience: *GASPS*

Robotnik: Wow . . . What a statement. This defiantly sounds like a reckless mother. Well, we talked to Vanilla and this is what she had to say.

Vanilla: (On screen in melancholy black and white) All these allegations are just not true. I do not know why Mister Vector is telling these lies. I love my child, Cream, with all my heart. And her pets Cheese and Chocola. And I will standout for my child, to protect her from this conniving liar!

Robotnik: Here she is, Vanilla T. Rabbit!

Vanilla walks out. Audience boos. Timid Vanilla hesitates to continue but eventually builds up the courage to sit down by Vector.

Robotnik: Hello, Vanilla.

Vanilla: Hello.

Robotnik: You say these claims by Vector are false?

Vanilla: Yes, he lying. I send my child to bed at 8:30 every night, the only place I leave her to play at alone is the backyard, and I’ve never even been to The Chaotix Headquarters for the past two years.

Robotnik: Vector also claims that you’ve been whoring around the town.

Vanilla: That is just NOT true!

Robotnik: Well, how about we get it from the mouth of the babe? I want to invite Cream up here. Cream?

Cream, in the audience looks at her mom, nervously. Vanilla nods once and Cream walks onto the stage. She walks to Robotnik and Robotnik kneels down to her.

Robotnik: Cream, would your say your mother is . . . Loving?

Cream: Yes.

Robotnik: Trustworthy?

Cream: Yes.

Robotnik: What about . . . Abusive? Has she ever hit you?

Cream: No, never! She’s the kindest person ever!

Robotnik: Has she told you what to say? Did she threaten you?

Cream: NO!

Vanilla: (To Robotnik) Please, stop!

Robotnik: (Examining situation, to Cream) You may sit down.

Cream runs back to her seat.

Robotnik: Well, we’re ALL about to find out the truth. *Holds out manila folder* I have here in my hand the lie detector test we gave Vanilla! *Opens it and pulls out results* We asked Vanilla if she has ever let her kid run rampid, she said no! . . . The test revealed that she was telling the truth! We tested you Vector and asked if this story was true, you said yes and the test revealed that that was a LIE! You made this whole story up!

Vector jumps out of his seat.

Vector: I hate that fracking dog! I wanted revenge for not taking me out on a date! Stupid fracking whore!

Robotnik: Get him out of here! Security!

Security, Omega and Big, runs out there and grabs Vector and force him backstage.

Cream runs up and hugs her mom.

Robotnik: Well, how about that? That’s it for The Doctor Robotnik Show. See you next time!

--------------------------Commercial-------------------------

A man with crazy strung out hair, and a wide smile on his face appears on screen

Crazy Carl: HI! I'm Crazy Carl!! Have you ever felt down and out?!

Shows a skinny man, trying to lift weights, but it falls on him

Crazy Carl: WELL!! I have the solution for you!! (shows a green can to the viewers) THIS BEAUTY IS CRAZY JUICE!!!!!! It's loaded and packed with sugar! Sugar!...SUGAR!!!!!!!! (hands it to skinny man) DRINK IT!!!!! NOW!!!!

Skinny man: (takes a drink and suddenly is able to life the weights miraculously) WOW!

Crazy Carl:......SUGAR!!!!!!

Skinny man: THANKS CRAZY CARL!!!!!! (thumbs up, lifting weight with one hand, and a wide smile on his face)

Crazy Carl: It's not me laddie... it's the....SUGAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Announcer: This product contains sugar, and uhh, water?

---------------Ending------------------------

Fade to black and fades to Robotnik

Robotnik: Remember, if YOU have a problem and need to contact us, please email us at either: animationmaster2@yahoo.com or anthony_against_the_world@yahoo.com. Please tell us the problem, the characters involved, and the characters to appear.

(You can also give us your OC's and we'll put em in.)

--------------Credits------------------

Intro: Esshole and Link_The_Hedgehog_Magician
Greetings: Esshole
Slot 1: Esshole
Commercial 1: Esshole
Slot 2: Link_The_Hedgehog_Magician
Commercial 2: Link_The_Hedgehog_Magician
Slot 3: Esshole
Commericial 3: Esshole
Commercial4: Link_The_Hedgehog_Magician
Ending: Link_The_Hedgehog_Magician
Credits: Esshole

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