Chapter 1 - Empty

AN: This was a request fic from the lovely Shin_chan, she demanded that i write a fluff fic... and while I did I found that I can not write fluff. o_o;; So, anyways, PLEASE read and review!! I love concrit!!! LOVE IT!! And also, if you want me to try my hand at this again, request a couple! The most popular couple I'll try to write another one okay? ::winks:: Now, ON WITH THE FIC! ::sits and eats popcorn::


Empty


I stared at myself in the rain soaked glass. A wall of brown hair hid my face.

As I hid myself.

How could I be so...

So...

Empty...?

I have been a solider since I was born...

It never really mattered.

Not until now.

No one ever really cared for me, not until Katherine.

But it wasn't what I needed, what I craved.

And I never knew I craved it...

Not until I meet him.

He was every thing I wanted to be, everything I craved.

He could carry out very mission he was given, effortlessly without question, and still remain human.

Not like me.

I looked to the gun on my unmade bed, contemplating ending it all.

It would be so easy, just to pick the gun up, aim and shoot.

I've done it a thousand times before.

But then, I've never thought of aiming the gun at my own head either.

I was so confused.

What do I do?

I felt pain in my empty heart.

And I feel something else...

What is it?

What is this feeling inside me?

What is it?

My hand closed around the guns base, holding its dead weight in my hand.

I started to raise the gun and then...

The door opened.

Hurriedly, I put it down, throwing haphazardly on my bed again as the door opened.

Oh god.

It was him.

Heero looked from the gun to me.

"Planning on eating your gun?" He asked, in the same cold voice I knew so well, but I could hear the barest trace of something. Was it concern?

No it couldnt be, he doesn't see more then anything more then a fellow pilot.

"I am allowed to have guns in here aren't I?" I asked him, leaning against the window frame.

He smirked slightly, catching me off guard. Usually the only one who could make him do that was Duo.

"So what are you doing here?" I asked, very curious as to why he was here. Since we detonated the gundams a year ago, I had only seen him a few times when he was at the colony I was at as well.

Heero looked around as though uncomfortable. "I came to say goodbye."

Goodbye?

"Goodbye?" I inquired.

Oh god, please no.

"I have a mission in the other colonies.. I probably wont be around for a while.. So I just wanted to say goodbye..."

"You are going to come back right?" I winced internally, I sounded concerned.

He nodded. "It's just surveillance duty."

I heaved a silent sigh of relief. It wasn't a suicide mission.

I don't know what I would do if it was a suicide mission.

I probably WOULD eat my gun.

There was an uncomfortable silence, I felt jittery.

He was so close to me, and yet... He was farther away then anything I had ever known.

This feeling is so alien to me...

This want...

This need...

I need him...

Heero gulped and turned to leave.

"Wait..." My voice was so meek, I hardly believed it was mine.

He stopped at the door. "What?"

"Please... stay..."

He was staring at me like I was crazy, which I probably was.

"Why?" He sounded... confused, Heh that made two of us.

".... Just please... stay..."

I need you.

I want you.

So please stay?

For me?

Heero was still staring at me as if I was a crazy man.

Damn.

I looked to the floor, feeling ashamed.

At the sound of footsteps, I looked up, only to find Heero standing in front of me, very close to me.

Oh God...If I just barely reached out...

I could touch him.

My hand trembled at the thought but I kept it tucked at my side.

"Why?" he asked me, his voice soft for once, not harsh as it usually was.

Because… I need you...

"...I..."

I need you here.

Stay with me please.

Love me as I do you...

Thoughts unbidden flew through my head.

I felt as if those dark blue eyes were piercing my soul.

".... I... I... need you here..."

God, now he really was staring at me as if I was insane.

There was an awkward silence as we both stared at the floor. For a long time, the only noise was the rain pounding the windows.
I fell onto my bed, sitting and staring intently at my hands.

Imagining how they'd look with Heero's entwined in them.

The very thought sent my heart pounding even more then it was.

And, as if my dreams were coming true, a hand appeared over mine.

Heero's.

I blinked, to make sure I was not dreaming.

I looked up at him in shock.

"Why?" he repeated, his voice barely above a whisper.

What was that?

That look in his eyes?

Was it ...love?

"Because..."

I love you...

"...I..."

I need you.

I want you.

"...I think I..."

Stay with me please.

"I think I love you...."

I felt a flush rise to my face.

Why did I just say that aloud when my gun was so close?

He raised his hand; I absently flinched, wondering how he would react.

But to my shock, he lifted his hand and caressed my face.

Shocked, I looked up at him. His eyes were filled with something I had never seen before in his.

Love.

Real and true love.

My heart leapt for joy.

And suddenly he was very close.

I felt his lips brush my forehead, as he wrapped his arms around me, the new weight knocking me backwards.

"...I think I do to..."

Later that day, we were lying side by side, entangled in each other's arms.

And, feeling happier then I ever had in my life, I looked out the window and smiled.

The sun was shining.

~~The End~~

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