Chapter 4 - The Myster of the Death of Zero

Chapter 4- The Mystery of the Death of Zero
Hey peeps! I know it’s looking pretty bad for my team right now, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to leave you in suspense. Do you remember that narrator I told you about? Well, it turns out that we had a budget cut, so we had to improvise. Instead of a professional narrator, we have the one and only (drum roll please) Ryan Secrest! Okay, I have a gig I need to be at so…it’s all yours Ryan. Don’t fail me or you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.
Wow, that was scary! Uhh, this is Ryan Secrest, filling in for Emma while she’s at her gig. First we will be going to Hannah and Archie, who went to fix up the “Vampire Knight” world. You may remember that they chose Renji to go with them, so let’s see how that went.
Hannah, Archie, and Renji arrived in the “Vampire Knight” world just in time to see it thrown into chaos. The (day class) girls (and Chairman Cross) were all freaking out and crying while the vampires appeared to be mad as heck. They appeared on the side of the mad as heck vampires. Ruka immediately ran up to Archie, grabbed his shirt, and started shaking him violently.
“Who is responsible for this?! Whoever did this knew that Kaname-sama would be blamed, and I want to know who!” she exclaimed hysterically.
“Pipe down, nobody knows what you’re talking about, and you sound like an idiot,” Renji said coolly.
Ruka just slapped herself and explained. “Zero was killed, and everyone is going to blame Kaname-sama.”
They all just stood there and stared at her. Hannah’s eye began to twitch, and her stare bored a hold in Ruka’s eyes. All of the sudden she sprang into action, tackled Ruka, and started strangling her.
“AHHHHH! ZERO’S DEAD! THE WORLD IS COMING TO AN END! ARCHIE, HOLD ME!” Hannah jumped into Archie’s arms, bawling senselessly and screaming.
“Relax, would ya? If we figure out what happened everything will go back to normal,” Renji said in his usual annoyed voice.
Hannah jumped out of Archie’s arms. “Oh, I knew that…Quick, to the scene of the crime!”
They left for the scene of the crime, but not before Hannah could have a little fun. She figured that since everything was going to go back to normal, it wouldn’t hurt if she set Ruka’s hair on fire. Ruka’s reaction was several crazy screams and shouting ‘IT BURNS US’ many, many times. That caused Renji to advise her to ‘get over it’, and, with that said, they moved on.
* * * *
When they arrived at the scene of the crime, fangirls from far and wide had gathered to see what was, most likely, the most horrible sight they had ever seen in their lives. Their hero, Zero Kiriyu, was lying in a ditch, dead as a doornail. His neck was mangled and mutilated all around. It was impossible to tell weather it was an act of murder or a natural death. The fangirls were prepared to wreak havoc upon whoever or whatever it was that did this to him.
A small, animal sized hold sparked the attention of our three adventurers. From the hold came the head of a small, cute, white rabbit. The rest of the rabbit came out of the hole and hopped over next to Zero. Every face looked thoroughly confused at the sight of the rabbit.
The rabbit hopped closer. Then, all of the sudden, one of the fangirls jumped into the ditch and moved to pet the rabbit. Then something shocking happened. The rabbit sprang into action, bit the fangirl’s neck, and killed her instantly. Everyone automatically ran away from the ditch with scared confusion.
“OMG! IT’S THE KILLER RABBIT FROM MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL! WHAT DO WE DO?!” Hannah shouted frantically.
Renji sighed in annoyance, “We use the holy hand grenade of course.”
“Alright, Archie, BRING US THE HOLY HAND GRENADE QUICK!”
“Okay, Hannah, I’ll go get it now,” Archie said going to fetch the holy hand grenade. He came back a few minutes later with the holy hand grenade.
“Yay! Archie’s back people!” Hannah exclaimed.
A roar of excitement came from the crowd of fangirls (and Chairman Cross).
“Hannah, there is a list of instructions, and it looks like there are some things we need to do first,” Archie said taking out the list.
‘Okay, what do we need to do?”
“Well, the instructions were really long so I think I’ll just summarize.”
“Whatever you do, do it quickly so we can take this bunny down!”
There was a roar of agreement from the fangirls…(oh, and Chairman Cross).
“Alright, gosh, you don’t have to yell. Okay, um, it says we have to eat orangutans and breakfast cereal, pull the pin out of the holy hand grenade, count to three, no more, no less (don’t count to four)…(or two unless you then proceed to say three)…(just count to three), then you point it in the direction of your foe, let go, and yell kaboomie.”
“Okay, let’s do it!”
They did everything the instructions said and shouted kaboomie. The result of their actions was that the killer rabbit went boom.
Deidara: “Yay! Go boom! Go boom! Art is a boom!”
Ryan Secrest: “No, Deidara, get out of here. I’m trying to narrate a story here.”
Deidara: “Oh, sorry. See you in the “Naruto Shippuuden” world.”
Anyway, like I was saying before I was rudely interrupted by a guy who has an uglier hairdo than Sanjaya, [Deidara:”I HEARD THAT MR. WEIRD, SPIKY, NARUTO DO!”] the killer rabbit went boom. Then Hannah and the other fangirls (and, of course, Chairman Cross) were disappointed to see that Zero was still dead. They decided that they had to fix all of the anime worlds before Zero (and Sasuke) would come back to life and Ruka’s hair would grow back. Because of that, Hannah, Archie, and Renji decided to move on.

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