Chapter 23 - The best friend I've ever had...

That night I was on my way to Ceylan’s room when I heard Terry. I looked around for him and he was talking to Rachel while she was in bed… Terry sat on the edge of the bed and was telling a story to her… I was leaning against the doorpost and listened to them…

Rachel: Then what happened?
Terry: Well, the king got pretty mad then. So he gathered all of his best warriors and the one who could return the princess would marry her.

Rachel: Sounds pretty cheap…
Terry: Well, yeah.
Rachel: … So then what happened?
Terry: Well… When-
Rachel: Don’t you ever get scared…?
Terry: … Why’s that…?
Rachel: Because… Sometimes… Sometimes I’m really scared… Like… When we were crossing the bridge or…

Terry: I know… But we’re here to protect you…
Rachel: I know but…
Terry: My mom always told me to sing a little song when you’re scared.
Rachel: A song…?
Terry: Hmm-mm… It really helps and before you know it, it goes away…
Rachel: *nods*
Terry: But hey, don’t worry about it, ok…?
Rachel: Okay…
Terry: Now where was I…?
Rachel: Eh… The king gathered all his warriors to save the princess.

Terry: Oh yeah. When all of the warriors gathered around at the king, there was a little guy who… Eh… Sold melons… And he vowed in front of everyone else to save the princess, because he was deeply in love with her… And so, the warriors set off, to the castle to defeat the dragon and to free the princess…

Rachel: … Melons?
Terry: … Yeah. ... Melons.
Nicole: Wasn’t that supposed to be a tailor…?

Then Terry and Rachel looked up to me…

Terry: No, a melons salesman, a guy who sells melons. *smiles*
Nicole: Alright… It’s you’re story…
Rachel: Then what happened?
Terry: He, eh… Sold a lot of melons and became filthy rich. The end.

Then he got up to walk towards me. I noticed he wanted to talk to me but…

Rachel: Awww!! If he sold all those melons, then who saved the princess?!!
Nicole: Yeah, who saved the princess…?
Rachel: It couldn’t be the evil sir Lancelot!
Nicole: … Lancelot is evil…? Now there’s an interesting turn of events… *smiles*
Terry: *sighs*

Terry sat down again and continued the story. The fairytale he was telling wasn’t quite accurate to the original. In fact, everything was improvised but it was fun to hear. Lots of laughs… At some point, Rachel fell asleep and we both walked away quietly… On our way, we didn’t say anything. Truth be told, I didn’t know what I had to say to Terry, and I guess he didn’t knew either… We reached the swimming pool and I sat on the ledge as I let my paws down in the water…

Terry: *sighs*
Nicole: …
Terry: Look… I don’t really know what to say, Nic… What do you want from me, an apology…?

Nicole: No…
Terry: *sighs*
Nicole: All I need is for you to understand… That’s all I want…
Terry: Yeah but take a look from my position… I need you to understand as well…
Nicole: I know… And I’m sorry…
Terry: You think it was a wrong thing to do…?

It stayed silent for a little while… I thought it was, but at the same time it wasn’t… But the water felt really nice… I wiggled my toes in the water and moved my paws around…

Terry: Hm…?
Nicole: *shakes head*
Terry: … I don’t know anymore, Nic. I’m sorry. I gotta go.

And he just walked away as I watched him leave… “It’s now or never” I thought…

Nicole: I don’t… I don’t think it was a mistake… But… It was a wrong thing to do…

Then he turned around… After standing there for a short moment, he came back and sat next to me…

Nicole: I don’t wanna lose you, Terry… I like you a lot, I really do but… I don’t wanna lose a very good friend because of what happened…

Terry: … Yeah…

It stayed silent for a short moment… Terry never said what he thought about it…

Nicole: What about you…? What do you think…?
Terry: Eh… I don’t know, Nic… Things aren’t being made easy for us… *sighs*
Nicole: Yeah…
Terry: I was scared shootless afterwards you know… I didn’t know what caused it, and… I don’t know, it never really got away…

It stayed silent for a while…

Nicole: … You think I’m a good friend to you, Terry…?
Terry: *nods slowly* Yeah… And not because of what happened…
Nicole: Heh…
Terry: … And if you would actually look you’re age, it probably would have never happened…

Nicole: Hehehehe… Yeah but… Do you think you would let this stand between our friendship…?

Terry: No… I love you a lot Nic, but… Not in the way I thought it was… For some reason, I just cant…

Nicole: And it’s not something I want either…
Terry: Things just have been really… shootty lately… And… It just happened, you know…
Nicole: *nods*
Terry: But eh… I don’t think it was a mistake either… And truth be told, I don’t regret it… It’s just what I felt afterwards was… I don’t know, I wasn’t myself but… Anyone else wouldn’t make too much of a deal of it but… I was really scared of something, and I didn’t know why…

Nicole: … Was it me…?
Terry: No…

Then it stayed silent for a long time… The only thing we heard was the water sloshing against the pool edges as I could see the light reflecting in it…

Nicole: What time is it…?
Terry: Half past eleven…
Nicole: *nods*
Terry: What are you gonna do now…?
Nicole: I’m going to bed soon…
Terry: No, I mean… Are you gonna tell Ceylan…?
Nicole: Maybe… I don’t know yet… I don’t think she’ll take it too kindly… And I don’t wanna risk that…

Terry: I understand…
Nicole: So… What’s the plan for tomorrow…?
Terry: I think its best we’re leaving tomorrow… I talked to everyone else and they agreed… Mahabi is on the road to recovery but he’ll make it…

Nicole: Azerbaijan is not that far anymore, is it…?
Terry: No… If everything works with us, we’ll be sipping tea in Azerbaijan in a few weeks…

Nicole: I’m not really fond of tea…
Terry: … Hot coco then…
Nicole: That sounds much nicer…
Terry: So, if everything works with us, we’ll be sipping hot coco in Azerbaijan in no time…
Nicole: *smiles*

Then again, it stayed silent for a moment… I noticed from the corner of my eyes that Terry looked at me with a serious face, but as soon as I faced him, his expression turned into a smile…

Terry: You know…
Nicole: Hm…?
Terry: You’ve got to be the best friend I’ve ever had… I never imagined someone like you being my best friend…

Nicole: Whadda ya mean someone like me…? What’s that supposed to mean?
Terry: You know… Someone… Dare I say it…?
Nicole: What?
Terry: Someone old…
Nicole: That has nothing to do with it…

Terry: Maybe not… I don’t know… But I do know that no one can take away your affection towards everyone else… I mean… No matter how grim the future might look, I can honestly say I’m glad to have known you… And I hope that whatever happens, you’ll find what you’re looking for… You manage to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, which is something I never could, let alone in hard times like this. You keep on loving people and manage to stay strong, even though the odds are against you… I envy you, Nicole… I really do, and… I wanted to let you know that you mean a lot to me…

Nicole: … Well… I can honestly that I’m flattered but… What’s with the sudden seriousness so all of a sudden…?

Terry: Because it might be too late to say when I’m not here anymore…
Nicole: Don’t talk like that… We all get to Azerbaijan in one piece… I can’t imagine myself sipping hot coco there without you…

Terry: *smiles*
Nicole: We’ll make it…
Terry: … Yeah… We’ll make it… It’s nothing… We’ll make it…

Terry and I hugged each other for a long time. We hugged before, but there was something different about this hug…

After about an hour or so, we went to bed… Well, I went over to Ceylan’s room… She was asleep and I just crawled in bed next to her… For a moment there, I stared outside the window, looking at the night sky, and thinking about everything… I didn’t understand the things that were happening outside and although we haven’t seen war in weeks, it’s still a scary thing to see the deserted streets and hear the total silence… Everywhere you looked, there were no signs of life… And that still scared me a lot… But everything seemed to fade away as I felt Ceylan’s warm breath in my neck… So I faced her… And she was asleep… I didn’t know why I was so captivated by her but for some reason, she did… The feeling I had only got stronger the longer I was staring at her… I let my hand going through her long brown hair… I wish she was awake… I wish she knew how I felt about her… I wish I could feel her… I wanted her to touch my face with her soft paws… There were so many things I wanted, and yet I realized all too well that was not gonna happen… I placed her paws in mine and felt how warm they were… All sorts of thoughts ran through my mind at that point… Even a few thoughts that I considered to be “cheeky”… But I didn’t realized those thoughts… And as I looked at her face again, I noticed her eyes were opening slowly, and she kept on staring at me with a sleepy look…

Nicole: Hey…
Ceylan: … Hey…
Nicole: I didn’t wake you, did I…?
Ceylan: No…
Nicole: … *sighs*
Ceylan: What’s wrong…?
Nicole: Ceylan…?
Ceylan: … Yeah…?
Nicole: I wanna ask you something…
Ceylan: … Sure… What is it…?
Nicole: …What would you do… If… If someone made you feel comfortable… That the same person would comfort you when you’re having sorrow, regrets, and misunderstandings of all the things happening…? What if that grows out to be more then just that…? What if you realize the person would never love you in the way you wanted it to be…?

Ceylan: … Well… Regardless of the person loving you or not in the way you wanted it to be, I would keep that person close… It would make a great friend instead…

Nicole: … No matter what happens…?
Ceylan: No matter what…
Nicole: *weak smile* Thank you, Ceylan…
Ceylan: No problem Nicole…
Nicole: *sighs*
Ceylan: … It’s about Terry, isn’t it…?

I didn’t want Ceylan to know that she was the one I meant… So I nodded to make her believe it was about Terry… She stroked her paw through my hair and kept assuring me everything was gonna be alright… I can’t explain how I felt that exact moment, but it was a wonderful feeling… So I did the same to her… I wanted her to feel the same… After a while, she fell asleep again, but I didn’t… I just continued to look at her… I close my eyes for a short moment and thought about her… As soon as I opened my eyes, I kissed her gently… But she didn’t wake up… I placed her paw in mine again, and kept her close like she said and kept on cuddling her… The familiar feelings came back once again, and the longer I held her, the stronger it got… I kissed her gently again and looked at her for a while… Then I felt my eyelids getting heavier, as I felt myself floating away and was still holding on to her hand…

I woke up by the sounds of footsteps in the hallway… I just thought it was Terry or someone else so I didn’t really make a big deal out of it… As I closed my eyes again, I thought I was imagining it… But then I heard people talking… Did I hear it right…? I listened again… Silence… But then the whispers came back… And it wasn’t from someone familiar… I pinched myself to see if I wasn’t dreaming… Then I looked outside the window and I could see flashes of light moving through the street… As soon as my eyes got used to the darkness, I noticed 4 humans standing outside… I felt chills down my spine and gently shook Ceylan awake…

Nicole: Ceylan…! Ceylan…!! Wake up…!!
Ceylan: Mhuh…?
Nicole: Wake up…! There are humans outside on the street…!
Ceylan: *gasps* Soldiers…?!
Nicole: No, I don’t think so…! Their only with a few…! I think there are people inside this building too…! We gotta warn the others…!

Ceylan: No…! Don’t go out of this room…!! Stay here…!!
Nicole: We can’t just-…!!

At that point, Ceylan muffled my mouth and quickly threw the bed-sheet on the ground next to her. She held on to me as rolled off the bed and we landed on the bed-sheet so that it wouldn’t sound so loud when we landed on the wooden floor. Then not long after that, the door opened up slowly and a flashlight was shining through… And we could see the black human postures in the doorway…

???: All the rooms are empty…
???: Yeah… Let’s move on…

Ceylan: … Mahabi is in the next room…!!
Nicole: We gotta do something…!
Ceylan: Alright…! Alright…! We’re gonna move slow…
Nicole: Ok… Ok… I’m ready…


We sneaked to the door and peeked around the doorpost… I didn’t see any humans in the hallway, but I noticed they were in Mahabi’s room…

???: It’s a furrie…
???: He’s wounded…
???: Yeah… Let’s put him out of his misery…

Ceylan and I slowly got inside… And I noticed they were heavily armed with weapons… I never felt this scared and nervous in my entire life, but as soon as one of them grabbed a knife to kill Mahabi in his sleep, something just snapped… I kicked the weapon out of the human’s hands from the back, then immediately grabbed his right arm and held it with all my strength as I kicked him in the waist… The other one turned around and aimed his weapon at me, but Ceylan smacked him really hard in the face… And I saw how she sliced his face open… He was killed instantly and dropped dead on the floor… In the mean time, I placed my foot in the human’s neck and slowly build up pressure against it… I was hoping he would give up… But as I stared at the human, I noticed it was a human girl… And as I looked at the bed, I noticed Mahabi was all baffled but quickly jumped up… I heard the human girl whimper in pain but there was nothing she could do to get free… We tried to reason with her for a short moment until I noticed from the corner of my eyes that she was grabbing something… In a desperate attempt, she swung her left arm towards me... Then it happened… I yelled as loud as I could and released the pressure on her neck… There was a loud snap… A bone snap… And she fell on the ground as something else fell next to her… The metallic object hit the ground… And I noticed it was a knife… I stared at the dead human girl with the dislocated neck as her eyes were wide open… And eh… I didn’t know what to do… All I could do was to stand there looking at her… I took a life… It’s something I never imagined I would do... And it was awful… I got pushed outside the room by Mahabi as he had a weapon shouldered that one of the humans was carrying. Ceylan followed not long after that… And well… It didn’t took long for Mahabi to realize what was happening…

Mahabi: We have to split up, their coming in! I’m gonna look for Lattei and Axel! Go!!

We couldn’t even respond to Mahabi. He ran away just like that… And he was right… I heard them… I could hear them running through the hallways, yelling at each other… And at that point, I got so scared that I couldn’t do anything. I kept on looking at the girl whose life I took, while I couldn’t move myself. I had to look, as if I had to confront myself with what I’ve done and had to bare the consequences of my actions… It seemed like every sound in the world started to fade off slowly as I heard gunfire echoing throughout the hallway. Even when Ceylan yelled at me to go, I didn’t move an inch. At some point, I felt something whizzing by. I didn’t realize that I almost got shot. I slowly turned my head from where I felt the whizzing and saw two human postures running towards us. I could hear Ceylan whimpering in pain as I just stood there, watching the human postures getting closer and closer… Then something pushed me violently to the ground as the yelling continued on… I saw the butt of a rifle battering my face over and over again, but the strange thing was that I didn’t feel anything… It was another human girl who was attacking me, and her eyes were cold… Like there was no life in there… Just plain hate and anger… The attack suddenly stopped when the other human who was attacking Ceylan felt dead next to me… The human girl, who was attacking me, looked up… I had trouble to keep my eyes open but I saw it was Axel… He pushed the girl violently against the wall… He grabbed her hair and smacked her face against the wall a couple of times before he slits her throat with a blade… But then more humans arrived and they looked baffled at the dead bodies…

Human: Son of a dog…
Axel: We’re not the ones who started it… *wipes blade clean*
Human: But that doesn’t change the fact you’re dead soon…
Axel: I’m sorry to have taken the lives of you’re men, but you would have done the same in my situation…

Human: No… In you’re situation; I would have clobbered you to death and actually like it… Then I would piss on you’re fracking corpse...

Axel: Then I suggest you stop talking and get on with it…
Human: You've got nothing. You’ve got nothing but your knuckles and your fancy blades... We have guns…

Axel: No… What you have are bullets, and the hope that when your guns are empty, I'm no longer be standing... Because if I still am, you'll all be dead before you've reloaded your weapons...

Human: Oh I can’t wait to see that happening…

At that point, Axel threw the blade he was holding towards a human… It hit the human in the head and dropped dead next to the others… The other humans were looking baffled at first but then opened fire to Axel who jumped sideways in the mean time, throwing another blade he got from under his jacket as he was hiding behind a pillar… And the second human dropped dead… Then another shot was heard and the last human dropped dead… As I looked to my left, I noticed Ceylan holding a pistol she got from the human who was dead next to her… Then Axel walked towards us…

Axel: You guys ok?!
Ceylan: N-No…
Axel: Nicole?!
Nicole: I eh……
Axel: Try to get up!

I was so dizzy and disoriented that I couldn’t get up… Axel helped Ceylan sitting up, but as soon as he noticed I had trouble to get up as well, he helped me getting up…

Axel: Hold still… You’re face is bleeding…
Nicole: I-Is it bad…?
Axel: It has a few deep cuts…
Mahabi: Nicole?!!! Ceylan?!!!
Axel: Over here!!!

The running through the corridors got louder and at some point, I noticed Lattei’s face above me… He looked shocked…

Lattei: … What the hell did they do to you…? You alright…?
Nicole: *nods slowly*
Mahabi: Up you go, Ceylan, easy…
Ceylan: … Where are Terry and Rachel…?
Lattei: We couldn’t find them…
Axel: Eh, let’s get you inside, and lock the door encase there’s more. We’re gonna look for them…

Lattei carried me inside the room as Axel and Mahabi carried Ceylan… She was way too big to be carried by one person… They placed us inside on the bed and then they ran off… It took a long time before I was recovered from the disorientation felt the unbearable pain in my face… I took a few deep breaths and told Ceylan I was gonna look for Terry and Rachel as well… I stumbled towards the door and continued into the dark hallway…

It was silent… Very silent… I heard my own footsteps echoing and had the feeling I could be attacked at any moment… But it never happened… I was afraid to be alone like that, but couldn’t stand the thought for not trying to look for Terry… It was the least thing I could do for him… He’s a friend after all… Then at some point, I reached the hallway… Walking went rather slow, because I was starting to feel dizzy again… I had to lean against the wall every now and then. And at some point, I walked passed the cafeteria… I thought I saw a figure moving in the large windows in the doors, so I slowly opened it…

Nicole: T-Terry…? Is that you…?

I was really scared to walk in like that but… I had to find Terry and Rachel… As I walked through the cafeteria, I noticed three dead human bodies on the ground… Further up was a bloodstained knife that Terry was always carrying… He had to be around… I peeked around another corner but there was no one there… I kept on walking until I heard voices through a door… So I opened it slowly… And I saw Terry down on his knees comforting Rachel as she was sobbing…

Terry: Ssh… I-It’s ok… It’s all over now…
Nicole: Terry…?
Terry: Nicole…?

I stumbled towards him and cuddled Terry and Rachel... I was really happy to see them being alright…

Nicole: You’re alright…
Terry: Y-yeah... Are the o-others safe…?
Nicole: Yeah… Th-Their safe…

But... There was something wrong with him... As I looked up to his face, I noticed he was pale and I felt my shirt getting soaked... And as I let go of him, I noticed that there was blood on my shirt... And that there was blood on his stomach too... And that’s when I realized he was shot in his stomach…

Terry: N-Nicole... Get the others to Azerbaijan... Get them safe... Take good care of Rachel...

Nicole: Terry...?
Terry: We've come a long way... Would be a shame to g-give up now, huh...? *weak smile*

Nicole: Terry, no...

Then all of a sudden, he collapsed and fell down on the ground...

Terry: Promise me you-you get them to Azerb-baijan safe, Nic... Please... Promise... Do i-it for me…

Nicole: I-I promise, Terry...

He looked at me and gave a weak smile as I placed my hand on his chest. I felt how his breathing became heavier and went slower and slower by the minute... He grabbed my hand and squeezed in it…

Terry: You k-know... I... I can see her you know...
Nicole: Who...?
Terry: S-Sarudja...
Nicole: Go to her... It’s ok…
Terry: Th-Think she'll be mad for... F-for what I d-did...?
Nicole: No... No, I don’t think she would be mad... She'll understand...
Terry: I'-I'm scared Nic...
Nicole: Sssh... It's ok... Go to her...
Terry: I-I’m so sorry...
Nicole: There's nothing to be sorry for… You’re the best friend I’ve ever had… Thank you for everything, Terry…
Terry: Th-Thanks fo-for being such a g-good friend, Nicole… I love you…
Nicole: I love you too…

Terry: *sings quietly* S-somewhere... Th-there's a... A place... Where... Where all you're troubles... f-fade away... Open up y-you're e-eyes...... And... And feel the...

I felt how Terry's grip loosened up and saw the life in his eyes slowly dieing out.... I kept squeezing his hand as I lay my head on his chest and caressed his short spiky hair… Not long after that, the singing faded off... And he stopped breathing... I closed his eyelids and kissed his forehead as I lay my head on his chest again... And just sobbed... After a while, I looked at his face and stared at it for a while... The longer I looked, the more it looked like as if he had a little weak smile on his face... And when I realized that, I couldn't hold myself anymore... I hugged Rachel while we were crying and held on to Terry… And I realized that Terry meant a lot more to me then I ever imagined…

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