Chapter 1 - Kickin It

The amazing piece of literature you’re about to read is told throughout various high schools, and even colleges. It took three young writers, plus a boring writing assignment in English class to discover the truth. Deal with it.<Insert a really ghetto title here, mebbe, and the names of the three authors. Like, LoliChan, Butterfly, and Taeko.> One day, little bunny FuuFuu was hoppin’ through the-WAIT! Wrong story! In a far away world, about ten blocks away from where you live now, there lived an exotic ecosystem, where the Wambians, Girl, and moles didn’t live in peace, until SHE showed up! Actually, she was there the whole time, but that’s not the point. She wasn’t cool enough to be noticed until she saved their world. Here’s her story… One day, Mr. Rabid Beaver was busy side-kickin’ it with Mr. Sir. GG Giraffe, when a glowing, mysterious, uninteresting, loser-y girl appeared. The girl, named Girl, who was really more like an over grown rabbit opossum, but cute-looking never-the-less, looked at them with little expression and said, “I bring you news of the moles, if, of course, you are willing to let me join your exotic cool quest”, to which GG replied, “what news is that, strange girl?”Girl says, “I bring news of the moles who are out to bring world peace”. They all scoff.“Oh..”, the girl adds, “oh yeah…And…and…they want all the money of the world!” GG then states after receiving this outrageous news, “blasty-nab, girl, we aren’t about to give any moles our stinkin’ mullah!”Rabid beaver then respectfully added, “yo’ w0rd, home g-slice phunk ‘yoz!”The strange girl clearly didn’t understand, being of a different ghetto-nation, unknown to the rest.GG says, “work for me, and you shall never need money again!”The girl looked at GG funny, with a rather awkward pause. “Okay” she replies, then walks away.Just then, the ground begins to rumble, and a huge parrot skyscraper thing slithers by. GG then notices a rabbit hopping by.“Where are you going?” asks GG. The rabbit stops and looks up.“I’m working for you, remember? I’m your spy!” the rabbit says bluntly. He then continues to hop after the girl.The girl notices the rabbit stalking her. She then stops abruptly, turns around, and screams, “GOSH! Stop following me, you flippin’ stalker!”To which the bunny replied, “fine, whatever. You smell bad, anyways!”Suddenly, the girl seemed to evaporate into thin air, and re-appear before a rather large group of moles. She grinned at them evily and began with some simple discussion…“Hi”. Just then, the ground began to rumble, and a huge parrot skyscraper thing slithered by. The moles simply glanced at it and shrugged, quickly turning back to the girl with their reply.“Hello”.“Don’t talk to me, you don’t know me like dat”! exclaimed the parrot skyscraper.Everyone turned to face it.“We weren’t even talking to you! But FINE”! With that, the moles slowly stumbled away, all paranoid-like and defeated, without finishing their eventful conversation with Girl.So the parrot skyscraper continues to slither away. Then suddenly, the mole wakes up (since he had obviously been dreaming), to find Girl standing creepishly in front of him. “What do you want?” asks the mole.“A bath”, replied Girl, “the rabbit said I smell, and I don’t want to anymore.”She is starting to look rather impatient.“You mean that rabbit”? The mole points at a nearby bush with ears. The girl turns around to see the bush.“I told you to leave me alone!” the girl yells.“But your scent is so strong that I was lured to follow it!” exclaims the rabbit.So, after hearing this, Girl runs into a puddle of water, which just happened to conveniently be nearby, stomps around, and demands soap be brought to her abruptly so as to get rid of the creepy stalker on her tail-not like she actually had a tail, or ever used soap for that matter.The girl cleaned herself up and the rabbit didn’t budge.“There. I’m clean. You can go now” says the girl.The rabbit stares at her.“What’s wrong with you? Do you take me for a fool, or are you just too blind to see that every effort made has failed, and there is no destroying me?”Just then, the parrot skyscraper thing hovered over them all.STOMP!!!The parrot skyscraper thing “accidentally” landed on the girl, crushing her. It then returned to it’s usual graceful hovering over the rest.“It’s a sign from GG!” they all exclaimed in awe, with the exception of Girl, because, well…You know…Just then, they all noticed the giant skyscraper parrot thing start to wildly flail it’s once graceful stumpy parrot wings, and they all exchanged worried glances.Suddenly, the parrot building thing collapsed onto everyone, crushing them all.Meanwhile…GG and the Rabid Beaver had exchanged a rather ghetto handshake, grinning wickedly at each other.“Now, little rabid Beaver dude, go quickly, and devour the remains, before Mr. Parrot Skyscraper gives birth to the deceiving…HUMANS!!” says GG.With that, Rabid Beaver was off.That’s how lies, deception, love, death, ghetto-schweet skill, and humans were created. So weird.The end. Duh.

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