Chapter 4 - poetry

~*~


After a good ten minutes of rather blunt indifference, Kagome successfully shook Hojo off without hurting his feelings TOO badly. Just when she had been beginning to think that he'd never go away. . . Heh. If her friends had been there she knew they would have been furious with her- insisting that she pulled her head out of the clouds and dated the rational, polite boy.


And maybe she would have- if she was interested. But she wasn't. Even she was unsure why- he was the most popular "hunk" in school- athletic, smart, kind- but she just wasn't attracted to him. He was a smidgen *too* nice in her book- and she could tell he was only listening to her to be polite.


Not like Inu-Yasha.


No, she could tell he was actually paying attention when she spoke. It was reflected in his beautiful, golden eyes. . .


Kag sighed blissfully, closing her own eyes and letting day dreams wash over her- until she realized what she was doing.


Falling out of her chair in shock and embarrassment, Kagome reassured herself that she didn't like him. Not like THAT, anyway. What the hell- she didn't like him at all!


. . .


Did she?


With another -but not-so-happy- sigh, the girl got up to leave the library when her eyes fell on Inu-Yasha's now empty table.


Actually, it was only `almost empty'. There was still something there. It looked like his homework. . .


Kagome bit her lip, trying to decide what to do. Go home like she didn't see it, or return it to him?


She couldn't just let him fail a class. . .


With that excuse- er- reason to visit, Kagome gathered up his things with hers and started on the long walk to Inu-Yasha, Sango, and Miroku's apartment with a song on her lips.


*


The hairs on the back of Sango's neck prickled in apprehension as she smelt a someone enter the large apartment building and begin up the stairs. It wasn't a wolf- she knew all the wolves scents by heart. It must be a human. . .


But wait. . .


It was only Kagome.


Sighing in relief, Sango opened the door before the girl had even knocked.


"Welcome, Kagome-chan!" Sango beamed, grabbing Kagome's hand and quickly tugging her inside, almost making her trip over the laundry bag as she did so.


Best not let the others do anything but smell her presence. . .


"Hi!" Kag grinned happily, though she looked slightly surprised by the sudden opening of the door. "What's up?"


"Not much, not much," Sango smiled back, walking over to the near-empty refrigerator. "Want something to drink?"


"Please," Kagome replied thankfully, taking the soda handed to her and dropping her and Inu-Yasha's things onto the old, patched couch.


"So. . .what brings you here?" the were-woman asked happily, flopping into the chair next to Kagome's at the breaking table.


"Well, I missed you," Kag began, taking a sip of her pop. It was true; she really had liked talking to Sango and couldn't wait to do it again.


"I'm flattered, but something in your eyes-" `-and your scent-' "tells me that that's not all," the older girl smirked knowingly, winking at her friend and chugging her beverage.


Kag grinned sheepishly in return. "Yeah, you're right. I also came to return some of Inu-Yasha's things."


Sango nearly spat out her mouthful of soda.


"Where did you get them?!" she inquired sharply, dropping her can on the coffee table with an almost suspicious glance. "He wasn't over at your house or anything, was he?! You weren't-"


"No!" Kagome interrupted, a blush quickly creeping up her face. "No no no! We met and talked a bit at the library, and he accidentally left his homework behind and. . . so. . ." her voice trailed off as Sango seemed to relax.


"Oh. . ." The elder female looked very relieved, but wariness still remained in her eyes. "I see. . .Talk, did you? What about?"


Kag's dark red tinge slowly melted away to the slightest pink. "Not much. . . just this and that, you know? Some stuff I'm interested in. . ."


Sango quirked an eyebrow but said nothing.


"And he also said that maybe we could talk again sometime. . ."


The were-woman cringed inside to see her friend's blush return.


shoot. This wasn't good.


"Er- Kagome-chan?" Sango asked slowly, fingering her drink nervously in her hands as she picked it up again. "What. . . do you think of Inu-Yasha?"


*


Inu-Yasha had returned to the apartment complex after a long walk around the city, lost in his thoughts. His thoughts mostly about the black haired, blue eyed, worthless, annoying dog named Kagome. The stupid mortal named Kagome. The damn girl he could suddenly not keep out of his head named Kagome!


Growling at himself, he ran his clawed hands against the shabby wall of the hallway as he made his way to his apartment. What was it about her that caused him so much trouble?! Was it her scent? Her voice? Her interest in things he adored as well?


Perhaps. .. . just maybe, she was more then just a mortal?


Maybe she was a witch that had cast some sort of dark spell over him?


But no. . .


We would have smelt dark magic in her.


Though now that he thought of it. . . he did remember sensing a little magic from her. . . But it wasn't the witch kind.


Or maybe (most likely, actually) he was just making the whole fracking thing up to try and keep his mind off of the qualities that she possessed that - to his disgust- he actually kinda sorta didn't hate.


He wouldn't say like.


He didn't like her.


No way.


No how.


. . .


Sighing, he put his key in the lock as he reached his apartment. He was about to open the door when his brain finally acknowledged what his senses had been screaming for a long time.


Kagome was in there. . .


And as his hand froze on the doorknob, his ears picked up the tell-tale sound of Sango's voice.


"Er- Kagome-chan?" Sango asked slowly, her voice soft. "What. . . do you think of Inu-Yasha?"


The rest of the werewolf's body froze as he heard his name mentioned.


Not only mentioned-


But mentioned in a question directed towards Kagome.


Oh gods. . .


*


Kagome's flushed cheeks darkened a little at the question. "Wha. . . what do I think of him?"


"Yeah."


The younger girl leaned back in her chair and chewed her thumb nail for a moment, as if trying to think of how to say whatever she was attempting to express. "I think," she began slowly, straightening up in her seat and subconsciously grabbing one of her books, hugging it to her chest as she often did when worried or embarrassed. "That Inu-Yasha is. . . different."


She didn't notice Sango suck in her cheeks at this.


"Not in a bad way. . . Just different," Kagome continued, looking away from her friend and out the window. The sky was darkening, as it always did at the end of the day, and those neon lights were slowly blinking into life again. They were kind of comforting, now that she gave them a chance. . . "He listens to me. . . when no one else will. He pretends not to care when I think he really does. He. . . means a lot to me, even though I really only just met him. And all though he can be a rude @$$. . . I think he's kind of- - -


Sweet."


The girl smiled at her older friend, who's sucked in cheeks had been loosened.


Sango's magenta orbs softened as they fell on the beaming girl.


`Oh, Kagome-chan. . . you don't know what you're getting yourself into. . .'


"You know what I mean?" Kag giggled, slowly loosening her grasp on the bound volume in her hands.


Sango- almost reluctantly- nodded, her voice failing her. After clearing her throat, she whispered. "Kagome. . . please, be careful around him. I don't want you to get hurt. . ."


The girl cocked her head in confusion, but nodded anyway as Sango, already aware of Inu-Yasha's presence outside the door, stood up.


"I've got a load of laundry I have to do really quick," the older girl grinned weakly at her friend. "Sorry to leave you alone, but the guys'll be furious if I don't get it done. I'll be right back, okay? You make yourself at home."


"You don't need any help?"


"I'll be fine," Sango assured with a smile, slinging a large, smelly, navy blue bag over her shoulder and heading out the door.


As the older female passed Inu-Yasha in the hall, she looked him up and down once, her lips pressed together tightly, before gliding quickly away. He caught the warning, though.


Taking a deep breath, the werewolf walked into his house- trying to ignore the girl's sweet, almost overpowering scent.


*


Kagome's whipped around at the sudden noise in the tiny foyer.


`Sango couldn't be back already- -?' she thought in surprise as she got off her chair and curiously padded towards the door. `Could she?'


Evidently not. For when she stopped and stared, she found herself face to face with Inu-Yasha- who did nothing but stare right back. The boy did look surprised though, when her face broke into a large smile.


"Inu-Yasha! Just who I was looking for!" she beamed as the werewolf felt himself grow uncomfortable.


"Oh?" he drawled, trying his best not to let her sense his fear- and his sudden wish to be a little closer to her.


"Yeah, you left the library so quickly that you forgo- hey! What are you doi-?" she began, but stopped in confusion as Inu-Yasha pushed rudely past her and quickly stomped to his room, where he then shut the door with a slam.


"What the hell is wrong with him?" she murmured to herself, scooping his and her things off the table. Whether he liked it or not, she needed to return his belongings, after all. So that was what she was going to do. `Well, here we go!' But when it came to barging inside, she paused.


Maybe she should just leave them on the coffee table. . . ?


She hesitated just outside his door for a moment-


And then she entered, just as loud music began pouring out of his stereo.


* Long lost words whisper slowly


To me *


"Good song. . . Evanescence, is it not?" she whispered, somehow sure that he would be able to hear her.


He did; jumping slightly as he whirled around


"What the hell do you still want?" he ground out, frustrated that he hadn't been rude enough before to make her go away. Guess he had to turn it up a notch.


"I just wanted to return your things to you. You left them at the library," she informed quietly, holding out a pile of books and spirals. She then took a step a closer.


She was near enough to touch him, now.


He had to move back. . . But why weren't his feet working?! And why was he suddenly not caring that they weren't?! He *DID* want to move. . .


Right?


* Still can't find what keeps me here *


Kagome swallowed as he gingerly took the books from her, trying and failing not to brush her fingers in the process. Both colored a bit but hid it.


"Um. . . Inu-Yasha?"


"Yeah, what?" he muttered coldly.


"I. . . also wanted to thank you. . . For listening to me and stuff today. . . you know. And . . . um. . . I really did mean it. I'd love to talk to you again sometime. . ."


She looked up at him with such hope he recoiled slightly.


* When all this time I've been so hollow


Inside *


"I said maybe, I meant maybe," he snarled, dumping his things on top of his messy bed and keeping his back to the girl, trying to will her to leave him alone.


* I know you're still there *


"That's. . . not all I wanted to thank you for," she whispered, stepping even closer to him, so close that her pleated skirt brushed the back of his pants. He slowly turned to face her, swallowing silently as her looked into her azure eyes.


Why did his heart pound so fast when she smiled at him?


Why did he want her to keep smiling?


AND WHY IN HELL DID HE FIND HIMSELF WANTING TO MAKE HER SMILE HIMSELF?!


* Watching me


Wanting me


I can feel you pull me down!


Fearing you


Loving you


I won't let you pull me down! *


`What the frack am I thinking?' he screamed at himself. `This is the girl you wanted to kill! The girl you hunted down and tried to destroy- and would have if it wasn't for your pathetic excuse for friends! Why are you suddenly glad you didn't?!'


The sad thing was he couldn't answer himself.


Check that.


The sad thing was that he was actually talking to himself.


A silence that seemed to take an eternity passed between the two as they looked into each other's eyes. And as the quiet deepened, only interrupted by the music that seemed so far away, Inu-Yasha's already sharp ears started picking up things that he hadn't been able to hear moments before.


Like Kagome's loudly thumping heart, for instance.


* Hunting you I can smell you


Alive!


You're heart pounding in my head! *


Finally, Kagome found her voice.


"I. . . I never really thanked you properly. Hell, I didn't thank you at all. . . for helping to save me from that. . . that dog thing. . ."


As she grinned, he felt a stab of guilt in his heart.


"So. . . thanks," she told him sweetly. And then, in a flash, he felt her warm lips press gently against his cheek before she gathered up her things and ran out of the room in embarrassment.


His eyes widened and he felt paralyzed as a hot flush suddenly crept up his cheeks.


* Watching me


Wanting me


I can feel you pull me down!


Saving me


Raping me


Watching me! *


His legs suddenly failing him, the teen boy went instantly from stiffness to jelly as he flopped back against his bed.


She. . .


Had kissed him.


And he. . .


He didn't. . .


He didn't care.


* Oh oh! Oh oh! Oh oh Oh oh oh Oh!


Oh oh! Oh oh! Oh oh Oh oh oh Oh! *


Finally noticing many uncomfortable lumps under his person, Inu rolled off the bed and found himself looking at his many text books.


But wait. . .


They weren't all his. . .


Picking up a blue and silver volume that he remembered seeing Kagome carry, he noticed that it was the poetry book he had seen briefly in her arms at the library.


His hands suddenly reaching out for the volume, he found himself flipping through it on the floor.


And then he found himself reading them.


`If you're asking if I love you, the answer is forever.


If you're asking if I'd hurt you, the answer is never.


If you're asking if I want you, the answer is I do.


If you're asking what I value most, the answer is you.'


If he had been reading these any time, any day, and any place except for here, now, and in this room with Kagome's kiss still warm on his cheek- he would have been laughing at these stupid, corny poems.


But now. . .


It was almost scary. . .


Like someone was trying to tell him something. . .


`If water were a kiss, I'd send you the sea.


If a hug were a leaf, I'd send you a tree.


If love was forever, I'd send you eternity!'


The poems were all sugary, sappy, and made him nervous- jittery. And then-


He found the poem that made his blood run cold.


`The first time I saw you, I was afraid to touch you.


The first time I touched you, I was afraid to kiss you.


The first time I kissed you, I was afraid to love you.


But now I love you and am afraid to lose you.'


This poem- this poem that so adequately described what he was afraid of- what could happen- being at this place, at this time- and delivered by her-


Was it fate. . .?


Closing the book shut with so much force that hurt his hand, Inu straightened on the floor in an icy sweat.


Did he love her. . .?


NO.


He didn't!


He wouldn't!


He couldn't. . . .


* Watching me!


Wanting me!


I can feel you pull me down!


Fearing you!


Loving you! *


Inu-Yasha, completely oblivious to his pounding music- only able to hear his pounding heart- threw the accursed poem book at the door and fell onto the bed.


He would NOT love Kagome.


* I won't let you pull me down! *


~*~

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