Chapter 25 - erasing memoreis!

Slowly the front door slid open, Kyou’s left hand sticking in first before he walked in the rest of the way and used his left hand to close the door, his right hand hidden in his pants pocket.

She moved quickly to the kitchen door smiling as she looked up to him. "...Welcome home Kyou-kun."

Smiling a bit, he looked over at her and nodded. "Thanks Tohru. Slowly he walked to the table and sat down, keeping his right hand hidden from sight.

"Do you want to help me in the kitchen the other two aren’t up yet."

"Sure, I'll help if you need help," he said, hoping that he could get by with just one hand so as not to worry her. Slowly he pushed himself up and walked towards the door.

She smiled as she went back to where she was cooking mixing the batter for pancakes. "If you can flip the fish slices for me please..." Nodding softly, he walks over to the pan and grabs a spatula, using his left hand to flip the slices while keeping his right hand hidden from her. It was still balled up in a fist shape, his knuckles and fingers highly swollen.

She looked over to him curiously. "Are you ok Kyou-kun you and the other two have been acting funny." She kissed his cheek softly. "...Does it have anything to do with us wanting a child?"

"I'm just nervous... that's all," he whispered, looking down at the fish. "It's a new feeling to me, I never imagined myself as a father, and so... it just makes me slightly nervous, because I didn't really have a father... my master was the closest thing I had... so, I don't know if I would be a good one."

"...I don't know if I'd make a good mother... I barely remember my mom's voice anymore. I don't know how she managed it taking care of me all by herself..." She took one of the already cooked slices taking a bit before slowly handing it to him.

Slowly he took the bite straight from her fingers while he flipped the rest with his left hand. "I'm just worried that I won't be a good father... my master was strict, and that's all I've ever known was strict discipline and hard training..."

"I was raised more open my mom wasn't very strict, but she was loving." She kissed his cheek softly. "With are child will have to different backgrounds I think it'll make for a good child." She smiled as she moved next to him placing some of the batter on a skillet.

Slowly he nodded, not looking at her as he grew sad. He didn't want her to see his expression, fearing she might read him like an open book. "Yea, our child will surely be a good one, with your love, and my discipline..."

"Maybe you could teach the child how to fight to like when you were little. That be so cool and then with Yuki-kun you can teach him or her to hate him." She giggled lightly flipping the pancakes over. Chuckling softly, although it was forced, he smiles a bit and continues to watch the fish cook. He was now wishing he could just tell her and get it over with, but he couldn't, he had to wait. She finished the pancakes by now the others had waken and were downstairs as Tohru brought the pancakes in setting them on table the others starting to dig in soon after. Kyou slowly turned down the heat on the stove as the fish became done, his eyes turning on her as she walked back into the kitchen.

She smiled up to him kissing his cheek softly. "Do you like it I thought I'd try a differnt kind of fish for you."

"I-I didn't even notice... I was so preoccupied with my thoughts that, I didn't see that it was different," he said as he looked down at the fish slowly.

"Oh its ok." She giggled lightly. "When I'm with our child will I crave a lot of fish like you?"

"I-I don't know... I don't know much about the subject I'm afraid," he said softly, biting his lip and looking back down at the fish. "It smells delicious, I can't wait to eat it..."

"The others are starting to eat I guess my friends going home after they eat." She blushed lightly. "Will be able to try probably then."

"Yea... after we speak with Shigure... He said he wanted to talk to us about something before we go off and try to become parents... Oh, and Hatori wants to check on your stitches and make sure they're staying put after you slept."

She nodded lightly smiling blissful unaware. "I bet he just wants to help us make sure we do this right." She blushed lightly as she spoke.

"He's not coming in the bedroom with me! I'm a man, I know how to have..." he stopped himself, not wanting to say the words too loudly, a slight blush on his cheek. "Maybe... but he did mention the stitches."

She nodded lightly blushing as she listened to him. "I love you so much Kyou-kun thank you caring so much about me and letting me be part of your family."

Smiling slightly, he nodded his head and reached up with his left hand to touch her cheek for just a moment before looking away and back to the fish, starting to scoop it out onto a plate. "I'm going to head out then I'll see you out there." She smiled faintly as she went into the dinning room. Slowly he picked up the plate and looked down at it with a slight sigh, This may be the last good meal I get like this... so I better enjoy it... while I can.

She sat beside her two friends that continued to eat her cooking. "Tohru will be leaving after breakfast I guess you guys are going to a family event today." Uo spoke patting her head gently careful of the stitches.

Slowly Kyou walked out of the kitchen with the plate of fish in his left hand. His right hand was now starting to hurt again, but he had to keep from showing it, forcing himself not to wince.

"Looks like ol' carrot top decided to join us." Uo watched the boy picking off a slice of fish from the trey.

"Hey that's mine," he grumbled as he quickly made his way to his seat, sitting down beside Tohru.

She looked up to him smiling a bit before starting to eat her pancakes. "I can make you more fish later you know that." A slight smile appeared on his lips briefly, before fading as he lifted a piece of fish to his lips without a word. She watched him sadly before returning to her food. Soon the others had finished their food the two girls getting up hugging Tohru before leaving. Slowly Kyou ate, one piece at a time, trying to savor the food and make it last. She sat back down to Kyou after the girls’ left she looked up to him smiling snatching a small piece away. Slowly he turned his head towards her and made a playful growling noise. She returned the growl with a small kiss on his cheek. Blushing slightly, he continued to eat the fish. She ate the piece she stole from him quietly resting her head on his shoulder Shigure walking in with Hatori. Kyou’s head lay against the top of Tohru's as he continued to eat at the fish very slowly. He almost felt like it was his last meal, and that he would never be able to eat again.

"...Kyou-kun do you not feel well Yuki-kun was acting just like you last night..."

"I just have a lot on my mind... that's all," he whispered as he ate another piece of fish slowly.

She nodded lightly. "Because of me?" She spoke softly closing her eyes slowly.

"Because of... well, us. I have just been thinking about us having a child so much that I've lost all track of everything else..."

She nodded as she looked up to him kissing him softly. “... We don't have to try it to day if you don't want I can wait..." Kyou blushed softly and glanced up at Shigure and Hatori, then slightly frowned because he knew that it was too late, Hatori was here for a reason and it would not work for him to go back now.

She watched his expression her smile fading. "Did I do something Kyou-kun?" She looked into his eyes carefully. “... I won't talk about it if it makes you uncomfortable."

"Tohru... we... we have to talk about something very serious... even though, I wish we didn't...” He was broken and it was obvious by his expression of pure sadness.

She sat up slowly looking into his eyes. "Its ok if you don't want a child I'm not forcing you." She was scared she started to think that he was scared of being a father so young.

"I-It's not that... I don't want to, but..." he couldn't finish, his head turned down as Shigure sat across the table from Tohru. Yuki's voice came out of the corner of the room where he'd moved and leaned into it. "Miss Honda... the cat can't have children... the mother won't survive birth... and, he refuses to let that happen to you... as do we all..."

She looked down sadly tears falling slowly before her hands went to her face covering her eyes trying to hide her sadness. She couldn't look at any of them her body starting to shake. "...I've failed you Kyou-kun..."

"No, Tohru... you haven't failed me, I, I didn't know... and by not knowing the faults of my own curse... I failed you...” Slowly Kyou stood and pulled his right hand out of his pocket holding it up to Hatori, "When I found out... I lost control of myself... and I think I broke it."

Hatori looked up to him. “... Should we take care of her first so she no longer suffers."

Slowly Kyou looked down at her, his eyes closing, "I'm sorry Tohru...” Stepping back from her, he turns around and places his left hand on the wall, leaning against it, slightly banging his head against it.

She stood slowly not sure why he was sorry. She placed her hand on his softly. “... Kyou-kun..."

Slightly he winced when she grabbed his broken hand, "Tohru... I'm so sorry that I didn't know..."

"...Its not your fault Kyou-kun... I'm sorry for speaking such nonsense about a child..." She was trying to make him feel better she was heartbroken though inside. "... Please let me help you or Shigure-san..."

"It wasn't nonsense... I wanted it, more than anything... but I can't risk your life..." he said, hitting his head on the wall again, his broken hand still balled into a fist.

"...Kyou-kun I would do anything to make you happy... There could be a chance that I won't lose my life..."

"But I can't take that risk... I can't risk losing you..." he said, his eyes closed as he pushed his head against the wall.

She knelt down beside him slowly reaching up to his cheek. "I'll get some bandages for your wound." She stood slowly Hatori grabbing hold of her wrist.

Slowly he turned to look at her, "Tohru... I...” He couldn't bring himself to say it, he couldn't admit that he had Hatori come to take her memories so she wouldn't have to suffer a broken heart.

She looked down sadly. "...Kyou-kun..." She spoke sadly as she knelt down in front of Hatori her eyes opening looking up to Kyou sadly. "...Is this what you want for me to forget you... To forget my only family..."

"I don't want you to forget me... but, I also don't want you to live with the burden of a broken heart... That way at least one of us can have a chance to be happy again..."

Hatori covered her eyes slowly with his hand. “... Kyou-kun... I love you... You promised you would never allow this..." Tears rolled down slowly.

He swallowed harshly as he looked at Hatori, "I love you too Tohru... I... am only glad that... you won't remember me having failed you... and breaking my promise... that only one of us will have to live with it...” He stepped forward, taking Hatori's hand away from her. "Not yet... I... just want a few more minutes with her, please..."

He nodded slowly moving his hand away Yuki looking up from where he was. "...You should take her to the little garden before you let Hatori-san take her memories..." his voice filled with sadness. Kyou nodded slightly as he reached down and offered her his left hand. His face was saddened. She took his hand slowly standing as she followed him she remained silent her eyes low.

Slowly he led her out back, into the small garden. Once there, he slowly kneeled down and stared out into the trees, still holding her hand. "I don't want to do this... you know that..."

She sat down slowly sitting beside him as she nodded sadly. “... Kyou-kun I'm sorry I failed you... I'm sorry I couldn't keep you from the cage..." Tears filled her eyes as she looked up to him. “... Please I promise I'll do better please don't take my memories of you away..."

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