Chapter 46 - i don't want to die

She gripped his shirt weakly shaking she was starting to break in front of him now she was trying her hardest not to cry in front of him the small child's eyes opened slowly looking to her mother. His hand lightly came to rest on her head, kissing the top of her head. "It's ok to be scared Tohru... you're always trying to be so strong... but everyone has times when they're scared." She nodded sadly as she rested her head on his shoulder burying it in his neck.

His hand continues to lightly run through her hair, holding her close as best he can with one hand.

"... I love you... Kyou-kun... Please don't forget me..." She spoke barely above a whisper.

"Stop talking like that.." he said softly as he continued to run his fingers through her hair. "I could never forget you..."

She smiled sadly as she closed her eyes. "... Thank you..." She whispered back as she moved away from him looking down to the baby that looked back to her mother confused. Nodding softly, he looked down at her and smiled faintly.

"I should get her bottle ready she's probably hungry now." She held the child in one arm as she struggled getting to her feet walking inside.

Slowly he pushed himself up and walked in behind her. "Here... let me hold her while you fix the bottle."

"... I'll just set her in the play pen I don't want you to transform and drop her." She walked towards the playpen. He nodded in silence, walking to the table and sitting down. He wanted to hold the girl in his hands, but he'd respect her wish. She walked into the kitchen preparing the bottle the small child sat up watching him through the matting of the pin. Kyou sat at the table with his head down, staring at its hard wooden surface. A slight sigh escaped him, his eyes half-closed. She let out a weak cry trying to get his attention before throwing her rattle against the bar of the pin.

Slowly his head turned towards her, eyes still half shut as he glanced at the child. "What..?" She smiled reaching up for him wanting to be touched and loved.

Slowly he stood and walked over to the pen, reaching down and picking the child up by his hands under her arms. "There there... mommy's working on your bottle..." She smiled her feet stretching out a bit as she let out a giggle still reaching for him. He chuckled softly as he held the girl in his hands, keeping her at a small distance so as to not allow an accidental embrace.

Tohru walked out to them as she took her from Kyou carefully holding her in her arms holding out the bottle for him. "You want to feed her?"

"Are you sure it'd be ok.." he asked softly as he took the bottle and looked at the little girl. "She wanted out... so I picked her up."

"Its ok just make sure the bottle is up so she doesn't get any of the foamy stuff." She held the child close to him. Smiling a bit, he holds the bottle up to the baby girl, putting it in her mouth at the right angle.

The child latched on quickly starting to drink. Tohru giggled watching the small child. "... I'll teach you how to feed her later without my help..." He smiled slightly as he looked down at the little one, watching as she drank down the milk that was flowing through the bottle's clear nipple. Her eyes were closed as she rested against her mother's chest. His free hand slowly lifted to run over the head of the small girl, smiling softly as he did so.

"... You'll be a good father for the baby on the way I have faith in you." She looked up to him smiling. He smiled softly as he looked at the child, softly petting her head still. The child fell asleep under his touch before letting go of the bottle a low yawn escaping her lips. Smiling he slowly pulled the bottle away and set it down on the table. She struggled to stand carrying her back to the playpen laying her down so she could rest. Smiling softly, he slowly stood and walked over to her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

She looked up to him sadly smiling kindly to him before covering the small child with a kitten printed blanket. "... I hope the child on the way is good for you two." His hand slowly lifted and came to rest on her cheek, silencing her with a kiss on the lips. He didn't like when she spoke of her own impending death, it made him feel uneasy and on the verge of a breakdown. She blushed lightly at his kiss her eyes lowering halfway as she returned his kiss.

Slowly he broke away from the kiss and brushed his thumb over her cheek. "We should get started on that project.." She nodded lightly as she smiled standing carefully making her way upstairs getting the material. Smiling still, he sat back down at the table and looked across it, waiting for her to come back down. She sat two books down on the table along with a box of pictures and decretive material.

Smiling, he looked into the box at the stuff. "Wow.. That’s a lot of stuff..."

She nodded lightly. "I want to make sure I get all I can say and put down so they know... Do you think we can find out the sex of the baby before I make the baby book for them I don't want to make a pink book if its a baby boy."

His head nodded softly, "Yea... but that may take awhile, you're not that far along yet... so... I doubt they could tell you yet. We could go ahead and make the book for Yumi though..."

She nodded lightly placing the book between them. "I only managed to get a few things down... You'd think with limited time you'd have so much to say."

"I'm sure you'll come up with more... you've still got a lot of time ahead of you..." He smiled as he reached across the table, holding her hand in his. "You really have to stop believing this is the end... you're the one that's going to free us from the curse, right? How can that person die?" She looked down sadly as she nodded going threw one of the boxes grabbing a few pictures of her with the baby. Smiling, he slowly helped her gather images. She placed them in the book gently placing small decorations around the images.

"That's really pretty Tohru..." he said as he watched her, helping her with the gluing from time to time.

She smiled. "Thank you for helping me Kyou-kun... I've been feeling weak lately I was starting to worry that I wouldn't be able to finish, but with your help I know I can now..."

"You're just feeling down because you're letting yourself believe that you're going to die. You have to be stronger hun..."

She blushed lightly as she looked to him sadly. "... You've never called me hun before Kyou-kun..."

"I haven't?" He tilted his head slightly and blushed, "I guess I haven't... I just, was so used to calling you by name..." She looked down nodding lightly as she went back to the baby book this time starting to write down things on a piece of paper. Smiling still, he watched her, one hand reaching out to hold the one she wasn't using to write with.

She kept her head down as she wrote. "... What am I supposed to tell the baby on the way."

"What do you want to tell him or her?" He spoke softly, smiling as he held her hand still. "What would you say to him or her if she or he were looking you in the eyes right now?"

"... That I love them..." She spoke sadly gripping his hand tightly now.

"What else?" His head tilted slightly, looking at her with a smile as he held her hand gently, trying to keep her calm and smiling.

"... I don't know..." She looked down slowly to the empty book.

"Take your time, you've got plenty of it.." Smiling, he gripped her hand still and held it to keep her calm. She nodded lightly letting go of his hand placing the note in the baby's book. Smiling, he watched her, helping her get the note all decorated and in place in the book.

"Is it ok if I lay down for a little bit?" She looked up to him slowly.

"Of course..." he said as he slowly stood and walked around to her side, wanting to help her to stand. "You'll be fine, you just got to get your mind off of what could happen."

She nodded lightly as she took his hand standing she slowly made her way to the porch. "Will you rest with me?"

Nodding softly, he walked with her, hand in hand to the porch and took a seat at the edge of the steps. She laid down slowly resting her head on his lap her eyes closing slowly. Slowly his fingers run through her hair, looking down at her with a tender, caring smile on his lips. She looked up to him smiling in return as she reached up petting his cheek. "... If you want to cry you can Kyou-kun I won't tell Yuki-kun..."

His head shakes slowly. "No... I'd rather just smile and see you smile. I want you to be strong, if you give up now... there's no hope for the curse to be lifted..."

She nodded lightly as she leaned up kissing his cheek. "... I want to free you and Yuki-kun..."

He nodded softly and smiled down at her as best he could, caressing her cheek in his hand. "I know you do..." She closed her eyes slowly as she placed her hand to his gently.

His hand slowly slid down and into her hair once more. "Rest now..."

She nodded lightly as she curled against him now holding onto the edge of his shirt. "... Kyou-kun I don't want to die."

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