It Never Ends Chapter 1

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what the heck is that lol it said it on the page

XD loli

yeh i copied it when it was there fac and it's buggyness

a dove ornament

oops o.o

lol it's okay i make spelling mistakes too sometimes

the computer said thats the right way to spell it D:

*stabs computer*

any comments about the story?

it's nice but i think if the person is narrating parts of a story they need to be enclosed in between ( ) ^^

?

Hi…I’m a boy who just moved from Washington to Oregon. I’m only 12. All I do is play soccer, baseball, and go to school. I’m not about perfect; I just want a friend that won’t always turns their back on me. Luckily the new school I’m going to doesn’t know any of my secrets. At my old school I was picked on for killing the class pet fish by feeding it rubber when I was 4 yrs. old. Now I’m called ‘Fish Stabber’; or was called ‘Fish Stabber’. “So I guess I’m a bit happy about moving…”

this part is a narrative part right inner thoughts

on this part: Hi…I’m a boy who just moved from Washington to Oregon. I’m only 12. All I do is play soccer, baseball, and go to school. I’m not about perfect; I just want a friend that won’t always turns their back on me. Luckily the new school I’m going to doesn’t know any of my secrets. At my old school I was picked on for killing the class pet fish by feeding it rubber when I was 4 yrs. old. Now I’m called ‘Fish Stabber’; or was called ‘Fish Stabber’.

hes talking t

on this part: Hi…I’m a boy who just moved from Washington to Oregon. I’m only 12. All I do is play soccer, baseball, and go to school. I’m not about perfect; I just want a friend that won’t always turns their back on me. Luckily the new school I’m going to doesn’t know any of my secrets. At my old school I was picked on for killing the class pet fish by feeding it rubber when I was 4 yrs. old. Now I’m called ‘Fish Stabber’; or was called ‘Fish Stabber’.

hes talking to you



but in this part: “So I guess I’m a bit happy about moving…”
hes talks out loud to his parents

and he says it because he just thought about what he was telling you

true but it sort of looked like he was talking out loud cuse of the quotes inner thoughts don't really require quotes^^

oh okay but that is why spacing would make it seems like two separate parts^^

but what do u like about the story? D:

whats you favorite part?

i dunno yet it's not done yet right?

{meaning if the character is narrating the story it needs to be like this^^}

nice but near the last line needs to be a ornament^^

the site screwed it up xD

print in fics needs top be like this^^

spacing like this^^

the bold print hurts my eyes plus it needs spacing sorry^^

hmmm needs not to be in bold first hand to be easier to read and spacing and paragraphs are needed^^

try again

i fixed it

so like the story so far? :3

i was replying to your other comment so i have not read it yet lol^^

the site screwed it up xD

try using the bb code by copying the story from where it is edited and past it in with the BB code submission process ^^

i just did

ill undo bold for ya

thanks it's just that kind of print is hard on my peepers lol^^