Chapter 1 - Bad excuses

In no particular order.

1)It's against my religion.
2)Osama stole it. Then he got runned over by a reindeer.
3)What is this homework?
4)H-homework? W-what homework?
5)You never gave us homework.
6)I jumped out of the bus and lost it.
7)Homework is boring, I fell asleep after saying 'h'
8)it was tied to a nuclear bomb that was fired to canada, notice they got smarter?
9)my homework ate my dog and now its sitting in my room thinking about what it has done
10)i realised that i was more intulect than the homework, so i didnt do it
11)I was mugged, my homework was taken instead of my money cause it was A-grade work!
12)you know, smart people dont need to do homework...
13)uhhhhh, lets see.....Aha!
My homework got in a fight with my rat.
...they're still fighting....
P. S. this is what it sounds like: sqeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaak(Rat)!!!! Grrrrrrrr...(Paper) Rip, rip...
14)King Kong came and took it.
15)Bob took it.
16)Some insane dude with a mohawk and big, black sunglasses took it and ran away.
17)I am going to be straight forward with ya... -point at some random classmate-HE TOOK IT!
18)See, i was doing my homework when suddennly TERRORISTS ATTACK! My homework was blown up in the bomb.
19)I already gave it to you, you must have lost it.
20)My brother was eating this sandwhich when this weird wind came by and swept my homework into his sandwhich and he ATE IT!
21)my horse ran it over.......no time to save it from that fate
22)Bob: "I wasn't here to get the homework"
Teacher: "You are marked on the register"
Bob: "No im not"
Teacher: "Yes you are sam"
Bob: "OK then i was here BUT i was a sleep when you gave it to the class"
23)(arrives coated in blue and yellow sugary goop)
An evil army of Marshmallow Peeps and Marshmallow Peep Bunnies beat me up and stole it from me.
24)i was mugged... by raccoons... they took it...
25)I didn't do it because I didn't want to add to MY TEACHER'S already heavy workload.
26)I made a paper plane out of it and it got hijacked.
27)I put it in a safe, but lost the combination.
28)Some aliens from outer space borrowed it so they could study how the human brain worked.
29)I loaned it to a friend, but he suddenly moved away.
30)I left it in my shirt and my mother put the shirt for washing.
31)My little sister ate it.
32)Could not log on to indianchild.com.
33)A sudden wind blew it out of my hand and I never saw it again.
34)I was kidnapped by terrorists and they only just let me go, so I didn't have time to do it.
35)The lights in our house went out, and I had to burn it to get enough light to see the fuse box.
36)Another pupil fell in a lake, and I jumped in to rescue him but unfortunately my homework drown.
37)I used it to fill a hole in my shoe, you wouldn't want it now.
38)My father had a nervous breakdown and he cut it up to make paper dolls.
39)I didn't do it, because I didn't want the other kids in the class to look bad.
40)my friend gave me an extention
41)I accidentally set it on fire.
42)hand the teacher a blank peice of paper and say "i wrote it in invisible ink"
43)It spontaneously combusted!
44)can i turn it in tomorrow? i had to floss my otter last night.......
45)Sorry, but I was busy saving the world, I'll hand it in soon.
46)My cat ate it.
47)InuYasha accidentally tore it to pieces using his Blades of Blood to fend off a demon.
48)I was too busy watching Dragon ball Z
Now for mine own:
49)I did it tomorrow.
50)My nabor Julian burned it so I would get grounded.
thats it so far.
Heres some others not from me
51)Didn't you hear? The president declared homework illegal 5 minutes ago!
52)There was a nuclear explosion. I protected myself from it with the papers.
53)I thought it was against child labor laws and I didn't want you to get in trouble.
54)My dog ate it but I can get it back to you in a week.
55)InuYasha killed it because he thought it was possessed.(It was possessed)
56)My fish ate it.
My toilet ate it.
My teddy bear ate it.
My dragon torched it.
My cat ate it.
The trash can ate it.
The shredder ate it.
I ate it!
Is this enough? I could go on forever.*bell rings* Nevermind.
57)Bob: hmmmmmm..... define homework.
Teacher: Work you do outside of school.
Bob: Define work and do and outside and school.
Teacher: You should know what those mean.
Bob: Well, I don't. I guess your not a very good teacher since I don't know.
Teacher:(with great irritation)Take a seat.
Bob: But you still haven't told me what the words mean.
Teacher:(Even more irritated) Just take your seat.
Bob: Then will you tell me what those words mean? *bell rings* Nevermind. *leaves with a smurk on his face*
58) *say really really fast* I was warped into an alternate dimension by my clock and had to fight demons all night. Then I escaped, but I didn't have enough time to do it...

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