Daisuki Means I Love You
Submitted January 21, 2008 Updated March 29, 2008 Status Complete | A one-shot with young Itachi and Sasuke. Brotherly love, not yaoi.
Category:
Anime/Manga » Naruto series |
Chapters
Chapters
Chapter 1 - Daisuki
Submitted: January 21, 2008 • Updated: March 29, 2008
Word count: 599 • Size: 3k • Comments: 3 • views: 395
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flyingeagle13 on March 29, 2008, 1:09:41 PM
flyingeagle13 on (Chapter: 1)
Very nice. I have to disagree with rlkitten on this one. I think the details are just right. Great job once again, though I see what you mean it needs some revision. (You know you can edit after you've posted) I also like the idea of the story, it's the first one I've read that portrays Itachi as a good guy. Faves story and author.[color=][/color]SunaNoFara on January 22, 2008, 11:41:43 AM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: index)
Ah...I need to do some major revisions....-_-'rlkitten on January 22, 2008, 7:49:31 AM
rlkitten on (Chapter: 1)
daaawwwSunaNoFara on January 22, 2008, 8:50:53 AM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: 1)
anything more specific...? I need some good old critique too ya know. While I submitted it I read through it thinking, "This story is so horrible..." -_-'
But thanks for commenting anyway^^
rlkitten on January 22, 2008, 8:59:45 AM
rlkitten on (Chapter: index)
Naw- I haven't got anything to say really..../\_/\; Sorry I think it's good...not great, but good.....I don't know how to say this...uhmm...a 'little teeny weeny bit' much on the detail. A little too much detail can make a story seem sort of long and boresome after a while...?Ex: The beautiful golden daffidil in the light blue vase sat in all tranquility on the dust covered windowsill that had a few marks, due to Rosietta putting her fingertips there every once in a while to look out the wide open window that was allowing snow to drift into her empty bedroom.
I mean...I can't image reading a whole story written just like that...i dunno....that was a bad example.. -_-;
SunaNoFara on January 22, 2008, 9:03:57 AM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: index)
Heh, especially with no commas in there. I could make that one sentence a whole lot better...rlkitten on January 22, 2008, 9:06:35 AM
rlkitten on (Chapter: index)
TWAS AN EXAMPLE, WOMAN!!! -_- aaahhhhSunaNoFara on January 22, 2008, 9:09:22 AM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: index)
I was just agreeing to the fact that it was a bad example. ;Prlkitten on January 22, 2008, 9:56:58 AM
rlkitten on (Chapter: index)
oh- yur smartt -_-;SunaNoFara on March 29, 2008, 1:42:24 PM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: index)
=P yes I am.rlkitten on March 29, 2008, 2:34:14 PM
rlkitten on (Chapter: index)
You reply months after?!SunaNoFara on March 29, 2008, 2:37:16 PM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: index)
IDK why. XDD I was just looking through the previous comments after I recieved a new one, so yeah. Lol.rlkitten on March 29, 2008, 2:40:41 PM
rlkitten on (Chapter: index)
Yeah- figured that. I'm being disagreed with XD MEh- I made that reply up on a dime- since you asked for something specific XDXDXDXDXDSunaNoFara on March 29, 2008, 2:43:27 PM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: index)
How do you fit on a dime? Those are like *indicates with fingers* that big!rlkitten on March 29, 2008, 2:46:48 PM
rlkitten on (Chapter: index)
*Neji stare* TT_TT Okay.LOL I was hoping you had edited it since my "word of crappy wisdom"- would make me seem smarter XDXDXDXD lol, jk
SunaNoFara on March 29, 2008, 2:49:46 PM
SunaNoFara on (Chapter: index)
You're not making sense anymore--I don't get what you're trying to say. /._.\rlkitten on March 29, 2008, 3:22:56 PM
rlkitten on (Chapter: index)
*is too lazy to explain*