Chapter 1 - Panic

The alarm clock chimed and the girl rolled over to look at the loud beast.
"Shuddup," she mumbled in a vain atempt to stop the screeching. She aimed again and sucsessfully hit the snooze button. In satisfaction, the dark haired girl rolled over and tried to drift back to sleep.
Just as the warming darkness started to devour the girl, the phone rang in that annoying pitch. She turned, slightly, to see that her nearest friend, Doxizehn, was calling. They had been friends since kindergarden and Doxi was the only person who would except Cassi for being as different as she was; a girl in kindergarden with hair the color of death and black eyes filled with enough hate to frighten even the bravest man, yet he still chose her to be his best friend out of all the normal, friendly kids. Cassi and Doxi remained friends up to eighth grade, then they drifted apart some, due to other friends getting in the way. But they remained friends all the way, through the good and bad. Now in nineth grade, Cassi and Doxizehn still talked, but rarely see each other in school.
She reached over and grasped the rebervarating reciver and said, "Hello?"
"Cassi?" replied Doxi's panicking mother. "Is the you?"

Lost in thought I sit blankly
Waiting for answers to unfold

"Yes?"
"It's Doxizehn." His mother started to cry. Cassi shifted the phone to her left shoulder with a concerned look on her face.
"What about him?" Cassi questioned. The sobs dimmed for a split second, long enough for Doxi's mom to blow her nose. "Did he get in trouble again?"
"No," the older woman exclaimed. "He's dead. He killed himself over night." Cassi dropped the phone and stared off into the distance, mentally hurting herself for not being there in his time of need.

Nothing, only failure
Comsumes my tainted mind

'Why wasn't I there for him?' the hurt girl thought. 'Why couldn't I protect him? Why didn't he tell me.' Cassi, unconciouslly, let a few salted droplets of water fall from her dark eyes onto the phone. 'Why did it end this way?'
The door opened to Cassi's room to reveal her drunken mother, nearly causing the greif-filled girl to fly off the hard matteress.
"Ya gotta get ta school." The frazzled woman slurred out the words without a care of how they sounded. The door was closed as quickly as it was opened, leaving Cassi to herself.

Childhood freedoms locked in darkness
Corridors filed with dreams, untold

Cassi stood up, letting a few more tears to fall to the floor. She hung up the now beeping phone and headed to her near empty closet. Grabbing her normal, a loose black t-shirt with a witty comment on it and a even looser pair or black pants, she tried to shove Doxi out of her mind for then. He just wouldn't leave.
'Will I forget about him?' she asked herself again. 'Will my thoughts and memories of him just turn to dust?"

Now, only memories
soon to be forgotten

She quickly pony-tailed her long hair, carelessly and headed for the kitchen to find her mother, passed out on the table with a sake bottle in her hand. Cassi took a bagel from the fridge and didn't even bother to muster up energy to heat it up, but just took a bite and headed out the
door.
One of her few friends, Gerard, waited for her on the road. Cassi headed up to him, carrying a large stack of books for school. Gerard took half the pile and the duo ventured up the road.
"did you hear what happened," Cassi whimpered, quietly, in contrast to her normally rough voice.
"Yes," Gerard simply replied, pushing his chest-length hair out of his face. "His mom called me this morning and woke me up." Cassi started to sob, again, and dropped her books and hugged the startled boy.
"Please, Gerard!" Cassi cried, miserably. "Help me!" He just stood there, not knowing what to think. She just cried softly onto his shoulder, tears faling onto his soft neck.
"It's okay," Gerard murmered, out of his own tough tone. "You can get through this." Cassi looked up at her friend, smiling weakly.
"Thanks."
They gathered up the books she dropped and continued down the road, to school. Cassi stayed close to her friend and he offered to carry all her books with his own.
Once at the reached building, Gerard headed to choir and Cassi went in her own direction to get to algebra.
During the day Cassi tried to remember all the good memories that her and Doxizehn shared, but only the unwanted ones came to mind; the memories of fights and reactments of arguements and the drops of blood Doxi shed when he first cut his wrists.

Moments of happiness devoured by hate
Sorrow pervades my hollow core

His father would beat him. Beat him to a bloody pulp for no reason. Doxi would come crying to Cassi for help when his dad was home and ask to stay at her house because her mother was always sleeping or at the bar. Only, last week, when Doxi's father was home and when he came to Cassi for help, she turned him down; her and her mother were going out that day and the miserable woman was actually sober. She didn't want to ruin this day and wouldn't let him in.
'Why can't I recall anything good?' Cassi's eyes traveled to her untouched math schoolwork and realised she spelt her name Doxi did; Kaasy. A small, microscopic grin apeared on the forlorn girl's face, allowing her to continue on in class.
Once the bell rang she ran down the corridor to find her female group of friends to say hi. On the way to their class she heard a small horde of students for the 'prep' clique saying horrid things about her former best friend.
"What a freak," one of the snott-nosed girls said. Cassi stoped long enough to listen in.
"Who cares if some one like him died," another chirped in.
"Not like he really mattered anyways," a third girl murmured.
Cassi had enough. She punched to closed 'prep' and kept on hitting in their direction. The girls ran down the hallways away from the mad 'goth'. A soft hand touched her shoulder and she threw another hit behind her. She quickly spun on her heel to see that her fist collided with Gerard's pale left cheek.
Cassi's eyes widened in apollogy as the boy smiled innocently.
"it's alright," he comforted. "They had what was comin'." He shoved some night-like hair away from her face to kiss her cheek, gently.
Gerard shoved Cassi down the hall and commented, "Now you don't want to be late to your next class, Miss Urima." Cassi smiled weakly and headed down the hall.
By the end of the day, Cassi nearly forgot about Doxi, exept for the fact that he wasn't there to walk her home.
Her and Gerard walked down the darkened streets, barely lit up by broken streetights and the dim shadows from the buildings, bordering the road.
Gerard shook his shead slighty and quoted, "when you said 'I want to stay after school' i didn't think you meant until nine."
Cassi giggled, cuddling up to the warm body, in contrast to the bitter night. The dark-haired boy's usually cheery face went grave, as in sudden thought.
"Ya know Doxi's funeral is tomorrow, right?" Cassi just nodded her head, showing she knew. "Are ya gonna go?"
"Yeah, duh," she answered as if it was the most obvious thing ever. Gerard just cooed slightly to himself in acknollegment.
They reached Cassi's house first and she invited her male friend in, shoving the door open even through the empty liquor bottles. Leaping through the garbage dump they called a kitchen, they saw Cassi's mother spread across the table, sleeping.
"Well, I'm not heartless enough to make you leave so you can stay here if you want."
They both slept on the floor of Cassi's rat-infested room.

Cassi shuddered slightly when the body heat from Gerard left with him as he rolled away. The girl opened her dark eyes to look about the room. The clock yelled suddenly, making Gerard jump nearly two feet in the air.
"That thing is evil, Cassi," Gerard complained, rubbing his now-sore head. She hit the button to silence the beast and they looked at each other for a minute.
Quickly the thoughts overwelmed the silence and tears begain to well up in both of their eyes. Cassi flung herself into Gerard's caring arms and cried, allowing his tainted tears to fall in her raven-black hair.
Soon they both recovered and headed to the funeral of their close friend. The heard of preps saw them coming, hand-in-hand, and started to riticule.
"What a loser," the first one said. "She just lost her boyfriend and she's already clinging to a new 'goth'." Cassi went to hit the girl, but Gerard's loving hand guided her back to her side.
"Her new boyfriend is worst then the first," the UNnatural blonde chortled. "He's gay."
"That's it," Gerard growled. "She goin' down. No one calls me gay and gets away with it unless your name is Doxi or Cassi. In a flash, the girl was on the dew-infested grass, with her pink skirt up a bit too high.
"Now that's what I call a loser," Cassi snapped. The girl simply blushed and stood up.
"Now," Gerard complained. "We get to listen to a sixty year old man make us worship.

After the funeral, all the guests had to walk down to the cemetary. Cassi and Gerard were directly behind the hearse. Once at the burial ground, they prayed again.
Quickly the people left, but the friends stayed by the casket, even when it started to rain. Cassi started to cry again when the dark casket was lowered into the soft earth.
"Maybe I should just kill myself," Cassi sputtered into Gerard's damp shoulder. "I'm now alone."
"No," Gerard cooed. "I'm still here and there's an angel hovering over you right now. A new angel. Let that angel have a reason to be with you. To protect you from a fate like his own."
Cassi smiled, know her friend was right. He kissed her lightly on the lips and they sat in the wet grass to whach the angels dance.

Forever, only anmiosity
Shall fill this angelic soul

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