Chapter 8 - Weird Pairings

Ino backed up slowly, peeking around the corner as she moved. Can’t let him see me…Not yet, anyway! I don’t know to say to him yet! I could never stand him before, how the hell did I fall in love with him?! (sigh) It doesn’t matter if I can’t tell him!

Ino peered around the corner again- he was getting closer!

How do I tell a guy I used to call ‘annoying’ that he’s suddenly gotten incredibly hot?! Even though I’ve worked with him before it’s like I’m seeing him for the first time…

=

Tenten practically ripped the scroll from Tsunade’s hands.

“Suna? Absolutely, I’ll go!” she said, far more chipper than usual. I get to see him again! Oh man, I can’t wait! Should I wear my old clothes, so he’ll know it’s me? Gah, too bad his sister will be there!

Tenten hurriedly packed her weapons up, hefting a huge summoning scroll onto her back.

That dog better not get involved…she might outrank me, and our villages might be friends now, but NO ONE gets between me and true love, now that I’ve found it! Neji was great, but too arrogant and concerned about his stupid bloodline. THIS guy, though…(sigh) much better! Now I’ve just gotta tell him!

Tsunade called Tenten back to attention.

“Tenten, you’ll be with a different team today- You’ll go with Ino and Naruto. It’s just a friendly mission, C-ranked for the travel, so there shouldn’t be any problems. Contact when you reach Suna. Expect to see a couple other Leaf Shinobi there.”

--

Ino couldn’t stop blushing. I’m actually on a mission- with him! I can’t believe I fell for the class loser! But after Sasuke…Recently, Naruto’s just been so grown up, and acted so much smarter than before. It’s amazing to think only two and a half years could change someone so much! This trip is the chance to tell him how I feel…

But something tugged at Ino. What about Hinata? Everyone knows she’s had her heart set on Naruto forever! If I get Naruto, it’ll crush her! What do I do, what do I do…I know! I’ll get her to love someone else! But who?! It’s not like she’s some hot girl I could just pawn off…

At that moment, the perfect patsy came strolling by. Both Hinata and this guy suffered from self esteem issues- they didn’t have any! And neither had many friends, not to mention borderline unhealthy obsessions. It was too perfect!

“CHOJI! C’mere! How would you like to go on a date?” Ino began, thinking that this would be challenging.

“Does this date involve food?” Choji replied, munching on a bag of potato chips, his ample belly shaking as he spoke.

“Absolutely! And it’s all on me- just go ask the right girl out. How’s that? C’mon, for Korean barbeque, and as a favor for teammates? Please?!”

Choji laughed. “Ino, ya had me at Korean barbeque. Whose the lucky girl?”

Ino smirked cruelly. “Hinata. And don’t worry about her not accepting- she will. Have a good time!”

--

Naruto, Tenten, and Ino met at the gates. Naruto wasn’t really thrilled with his team.

Great, the dog and the weapons girl. If Ino doesn’t ruin my ears with her complaining, Tenten will find a reason to cut them off or something! Well, at least Tenten’s dangerous, Ino’s just kinda…useless.

“To the Sand Village!” Tenten declared happily, leading the way. Usually it was Naruto yelling and then forging the path. So Ino’s eyebrow went up.

“Why’re you so eager to get there, Ten? Got a hot date or something?” Ino snickered. Man, girls could be mean! Guys got in fist fights, but girls…they teased each other until they got anxiety disorders or something!

“Nah! Just like to travel, that’s all!” Tenten shot back, making sure not to look back- her face had turned several shades of magenta, and that would have been all Ino needed to keep up the teasing. In fact, when she stopped, Tenten got suspicious. She looked back and saw Ino walking at the same pace as Naruto. If he stopped, she stopped. When he wasn’t looking, she was staring at him. There were practically hearts in her eyes.

Ah! So that’s what’s going on! To tease or not to tease…

Tenten started to say something, but closed her mouth. Ino and Naruto together- that was a strange thought to her. But, then again, Tenten fell for a guy with a puppet fetish; who was she to call anyone weird. Besides that, she could always tease if Ino started it.

--

It was hard to say why a girl liked a certain guy. Tenten had the simplest reason- puppets were cool! They were all weapons! Cut out one joint, and there’s a knife. Destroy the puppet- no problem, the head has poison in it! It slices, it dices, it throws kunai, it attacks from long range or short range. Everything a weapon should do. So maybe Tenten was enthralled with the weapon more than the guy handling it. That was possible, but it didn’t feel that way to her.

Ino was harder to figure out. But it went something like this: Naruto liked her rival, Sakura, for a while before growing out of it. In the three years that had passed since she had really know Naruto, it seemed Naruto had gotten stronger every day. And he had a tendency to succeed. So if he became Hokage, Ino would have looks, money, a hot husband with a ton of energy (Not my view, it just sounds like Ino –NG), and he was strong- he could protect her.

It wasn’t as if there wasn’t a ton of strange couples these days. There was Ryouko, the model student, a hard worker, dedicated, loyal, and constantly striving to improve. And who did he wind up with? Sakura? Temari? Shizune? Say what- he’s dating a bounty hunter who used to hunt him? Sure, she was beautiful, but Azami and Ryouko? That was out there. Somehow, Azami had just held up her crossbow, and Ryouko fell for her. Somehow, Azami felt the same way, and now the two were dating and working together. Naturally, lots of steamy gossip arose- the two were always away, hunting. Probably sharing a tent or a hotel room. And Azami DID tend to get what she wanted…if she wanted Ryouko she probably ‘had’ him.

But that aside, love doesn’t happen for a reason. That’s all speculation. However it came about, there were three unlikely couples around. Or maybe four?

--

Choji asked Hinata out.

“Hinata, wanna go grab some Korean Barbeque with me?”

A simple question, easy enough to answer. Except this was shy little Hinata!

“S-s-sure, Choji!” Where did that c-come from? C-c-choji asked me out? What’s this feeling in my heart?

Hinata liked Choji. It became apparent as their night went on that it wasn’t just Hinata feeling this way. Choji, too, seemed to be interested in more than the food. (Not to say he ignored the food completely- miracles DID happen, but not one that big!)

The two were eating, and Hinata had gotten more and more comfortable with Choji. He was a friendly guy; everyone knew that. When you got him mad, look out. But other than that, he was polite, kind, and gentle- much like Hinata. Neither one of them was viewed as ‘hot’ or even close, but they were both attractive to each other in a shy way. The food was good, the company was better, and the best was yet to come.

Choji had eaten in his normal way- he barely tasted it. A little sauce splattered onto his cheek. Hinata giggles shyly. Choji looked up in surprise, but Hinata took care of the sauce. She leaned forward licked it off Choji’s cheek. That semi-innocent little gesture cemented the fourth strange couple in the making.

--

As for Ryouko and Azami, that was strange. Ryouko was twenty, never had a girlfriend. Never dated. Never been kissed. Man, it sucked to be him! But then, one day, as he’s fighting for his life (Typical of him, he’s always doing that. You’d think he would stop fighting, or maybe try being less noble), his opponent is a drop-dead gorgeous female. A mix of Japanese and Egyptian, with long legs, a curvy body, and a face that had an underlying innocence to it.

The two had ‘tangoed’, exchanging strikes with knives, swords, and fists. Azami swept Ryouko’s legs, sending him down. Ryouko rolled over and struck with a knife. He found one at his own throat. Azami had him dead to rights, though- he was on his back, clearly the loser of the fight. Not that it was going to end there.

“Drop the knife. Be a good boy…” Azami let her knife clatter to the ground. Ryouko narrowed his eyes, but followed suit. Stupid as it was, Ryouko never took an undue advantage in combat. If his opponent only had fists, that was what Ryouko had, too, whether he was armed to the teeth like usual, or caught unaware.

“I’ve got to say…you’re nice looking up close. My employers DID ask for you alive anyway. It’d be a shame to kill you.”

Azami’s dark eyes met Ryouko’s dark eyes. There was a spark there, and they both knew it.

The rest, as they say, is history. The two now date, but Ryouko is still clueless. Azami wasn’t much better, but it seemed girls instinctively knew how dates were supposed to go.

--

Now in Sunagakure, Tenten, Naruto, and Ino had to decide to procede. Only Naruto was here for the mission, really. The girls had other plans. Ino gave up on trying to outwit Tenten. Maybe she could recruit Tenten to help, or at least get her to stay out of the way.

“Bathroom break!” Ino announced. She gave Tenten a meaningful look. It took Tenten a minute, but she got the message within the message.

“Uh, yeah, me, too! Be right back!”

-

In the girl’s bathroom, Ino and Tenten compared notes.

“NARUTO/KANKURO?!” they exclaimed at each other, ‘no way’ expressions crossing their faces.

“I thought you thought he was annoying!” Tenten began.

“I did!” Ino admitted. “I thought you hated his sister!”

“I DO!” Tenten nearly shouted. After that lively little exchange, the girls settled down and thought.

“I’ll get Naruto out of the way somehow. That way, he’ll be with me. You’ll have a free shot at Kankuro, and I’ll be with Naruto. It’s perfect!” Ino was happy. She just had to think up an excuse. She could do that.

“Should I re-do my make-up?” Ino suddenly fretted.

“Hardly. Naruto wouldn’t notice it,” Tenten snorted. Then she started wondering if she should…after all, what else could that purple crap on Kankuro’s face be but makeup. Surely he would appreciate it!

The girls looked at each, nodded, then got to work.

--

Outside, Naruto was waiting impatiently, tapping his foot and growling ‘c’mon already!’ under his breath every five seconds. He liked seeing Gaara and his siblings, but the Sand Village was hot, and the people could be nasty. Blegh- he’d rather be in the Leaf. At least he knew WHY people hated him there.

“Hmm? Hey, it’s Naruto!” Kankuro nudged Temari. As official representatives of the Village Hidden in the Sand, they had to greet everyone, but not too many that passed through had done so much for the village. Or them personally, for that matter.

“Oh, hey guys!” Naruto waved enthusiastically, jogging over to see his old…friends? allies? Friends was easier, let’s go with that.

“What’re you doin’ here?” Kankuro asked. “It’s not like you come by all the time.”

“I’m here with a coupla kunoichi on some mission for Grandma Tsunade. Don’t know what it is I’m supposed to be doing. Something about the chunin exams or something.”

“That’s usually that slouch Shikamaru’s job,” Temari murmured. “Oh well, probably couldn’t interrupt his cloud watching.”

“Weren’t you two dating before this?” Naruto wheedled.

“NO!” Temari responded, blushing despite herself. To cover up, she muttered ‘damn sunburn’, and made a show looking around to find someone she knew.

Good timing, because Tenten came out of the bathroom at that point.

“Eep! Er, Hi! It’s…Kankuro, right?” Tenten said cautiously. Like I don’t know!

“Yeah, that’s right. You’re…Ten…Ten. That’s it, Tenten!” Kankuro replied. A girl like that…practical, useful. Surprised that Ekyt guy didn’t wind up with her. Ah well, time for me to make my move. Wonder if she’s into puppets?

Tenten piped up next. “Oh, you’re the guy with the puppets, right? I’ve been meaning to say how impressed I am with them. They’re just about the deadliest weapons I’ve ever seen.”

“Heh, you sure you don’t keep deadlier ones in that scroll of yours? I seem to recall seeing them a coupla times now. Almost on the receiving end once!”

Tactfully, Kankuro asked Tenten if she had ever seen all of the Sand Village. Tenten HAD, but lied through her teeth, justifying it by telling herself she had seen it, but never had a guided tour, so she didn’t really KNOW the town so well. Yeah, that worked.

-

Ino came tearing out of the bathroom next, bumping right into Naruto.

“Ah! Sorry!” she said sheepishly, turning ten shades of red. Damn, I REALLY wanted that to go smoother! I didn’t even take his legs out from under him. If he had landed on top of, my plan would have been perfect! Guess that proves that he’s gotten stronger if I couldn’t even budge him. GAH! I’ve been off my diet, too!

“S’okay Ino. (Naruto offered her a hand up) Hey, have you been on a diet or something? You’re looking good!”

Ino was surprised, but guessed she shouldn’t be. I look healthier now. Or at least that’s what Shikamaru said. And I haven’t doged Naruto out once this trip! (A new personal best!) So…I didn’t think we’d ever get to this point! What do I do?

“Listen, Ino. I, uh, wrote this book. Pervy Sage kinda thought of using you for a main character. I told him ‘no way’, you’re too classy for his books. But, uh, if you’re interested, I could get you in the next one!”

That was typical Naruto- clueless, but kindhearted. That sentence gave Ino a surge of confidence.

“Say Naruto, are you free sometime? To, uh…you know, hang out? I was a complete dog to you in the past, and I’m really sorry!” Ino started to ramble. “But then you came back and you were all stronger and hotter and damn I just said that out loud!”

Naruto chuckled. “Y’know, you’re a lot of things, Ino. Subtle isn’t one of them. And…I’m free whenever you are. How about now?”

“Now’s good!” Ino managed, going off hand in hand with Naruto.

--

“It seems they didn’t need us after all,” an amused Ekyt/Ryouko said, watching from the rooftops.

“Well, we didn’t factor on the guys having any clue. We just assumed all guys were like you. You know, completely dense when it comes to love,” Azami told him with a reserved chuckle. He really is…c’mon, say something already! I gave you a HUGE opening just now! Take it!

“I am completely dense in that respect. Maybe I just think too highly of kunoichi. Bounty Hunters are another story…” Ryouko muttered, slipping a hand around Azami’s waist.

“You’re learning, I’ll give you that much. Now why don’t you muster up the guts to ask me out like you want, and we’ll get going.”

“You won’t say no?” Ryouko replied, apparently shocked. (Or at least faking it well. Being clueless gave you an out if you screwed up, conscious of it or not)

“Have I said no yet? I wouldn’t keep hanging out if I wasn’t interested, stupid!”

Ryouko shrugged. “I thought you liked my skills.”

Azami shook her head. “Boys are stupid.”

--

AUTHOR’S NOTES

My first weird pairing fic! I hope all of you enjoyed it! This came about as a request from YOURIMAGINARYFRIEND. To YIF- sorry it took so long! I wasn’t sure how to end the fic. I was surprised at how well the pairings wound up making sense. I know you didn’t ask for ChojiXHinata, but I needed a little something extra in there. No fun if you know the entire fic, right?

Anyway, everyone, enjoy, comment, and shake your heads with disdain if you must. I had fun writing this one.

Ciao for now, I’ll update soon!

-NG

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