Chapter 2 - The Night Runner
Submitted February 28, 2006 Updated February 28, 2006 Status Incomplete | Little bits and pieces that I could continue on. Critique, please, and recommend which one would best work for a story line.
Category:
Miscellaneous » Characters |
Chapter 2 - The Night Runner
Chapter 2 - The Night Runner
I've always thought that the night brings out the most interesting in people. Whether or not we accept that is a different matter, but at night, when I'm sitting in the passenger seat staring out the window at the light-smeared streets, it seems like everything goes into different perspective. Light is harsher, shows everything in truth and spares nothing of reality.
But night?
Ha-ha...Night brings out the darkest of the shadows, the worst of our fears. It is at nigt that those monsters hiding in your closet unleash themselves, and it is at night that dreams unstick themselves from their hiding spots and come to you, showing you the lure of the night-life, the lure of the shadows and the mystery and lore.
After all, we dream in black and white, no?
Night hides the truth, and brings us that hypnotic fantasy.
Day shows us the bitterness of reality.
Driving in that car at night, the engine purring like a jaguar primed for hunt and the lights glinting like knives on the highway aronud us, I peer into other darkened interiors of cars driving along-side us, floating like ghosts amid a gray sea, and wonder what there daily life is. We're complete strangers now, but in that instant when your eyes suddenly link with another's, in a car not too far from you, there is a connection.
But then they press the gas, and you are left in your own world.
So what does night tell us about ourselves, hmm?
It shows our fears, our loves, our fantasies.
And the night...Well, like the mind, it is a scary place.
A very scary place indeed.
Comments
You are not authorized to comment here. Your must be registered and logged in to comment
Orlando_Hamar on June 29, 2006, 3:21:50 AM
Orelin on May 7, 2006, 9:45:30 AM
Orelin on
I really like this one. You could basically expand it to anything you wanted to. YOu're very talented, very talented. I'm actually thining about getting back into my wirting self again, since I've been so busy it's hard, but I really like this. It makes me want to write again.
Nahh...
A-anyway, this was really too short for me to nitpick. But then again, I'm good at accomplishing the impossible:
You have a fair few spelling mistakes here and there.
I also find this small part to feel slightly rushed:
Well, tell me if my alterations are better:
For me, that speeds up the pace, thus allowing you to add in more details, such as the sounds...but then, that's just me. You might like the original.
In all, this was a good part. Too different from it to compare to the first chapter, but I personally prefered this one. Could it have something to do with dialogue? We'll see...
On to Chapter 3!