rain
Submitted July 27, 2005 Updated July 27, 2005 Status Incomplete |
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Cartoons » Avatar: The Last Airbender » Fan Characters (OC's) |
Chapters
Chapters
Chapter 1 - rain
Submitted: July 27, 2005 • Updated: July 27, 2005
Word count: 70 • Size: <1k • Comments: 4 • views: 146
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AnimeMangaLover on July 29, 2005, 8:43:27 AM
AnimeMangaLover on (Chapter: 1)
It's good. Beautifully written.Black_Breeze on July 28, 2005, 9:26:25 AM
Black_Breeze on (Chapter: 1)
Well, given the proper formatting, that is... ;)Black_Breeze on July 28, 2005, 9:25:56 AM
Black_Breeze on (Chapter: 1)
Good, good... Simple and sweet, as how I like poems... But I think that you should have added "it is" to your third stanza, so it would be--"They all think how insane it is to feel such pain, just sitting there in the rain."
And also, you have to put your name at the bottom of the poem (it's just proper formatting).
Very nice, very nice... Just need to clean up a few things, but other than that, very well thought out. This would have also served well as a haiku...
xomarikzsweetzox on July 27, 2005, 4:08:15 AM
xomarikzsweetzox on (Chapter: 1)
very very good poem or story.keep it up.