Chapter 30 - Arc IV: Harsh Reality- Chapter 4

Yuuko began her story after a long, reflective pause in which she seemed to age further. But her chakra stayed vital.

“First, let me say that, since you’ve already felt it- my chakra IS abnormal. In fact, this isn’t MY chakra. This chakra is from a deceased shinobi. It was implanted in me after his death.”

That was enough to elicit a hushed silence. The medic in Sakura got the best of her, though, and she asked:
“How is that possible? The chakra is gone once a person dies…”

Yuuko nodded in agreement. “Normally, yes. But as you can resuscitate a dying person, you can resuscitate a dying chakra.”

Asuma pulled his cigarette out of his mouth for a moment, exhaling smoke. “How is that possible? To catch a dying chakra in time, you’d have to be there the instant the person died. Not to mention have the equipment and the know-how to transfer chakra.”

Yuuko nodded again. “Yes, that’s true. This was a planned instance. As in, the shinobi I mentioned- my husband- was murdered.”
She clenched her fist, squeezing until her aged knuckles turned white.
“He was murdered by the Third Kazekage right before my eyes. Immediately, his chakra was put into me. At the time, my husband was all for it…”

“Hold on a minute,” Shikamaru interrupted, holding up a hand. “Your husband was murdered, and he was all for it? Maybe it’s the difference in cultures, but there’s no way that would happen where I’m from. Why would someone let themselves be murdered?”

“My husband believed there was no choice,’ Yuuko said sadly, looking up at the ceiling. “Back then, those of us who could use water style filled the Sand’s reservoir’s. Water was never a concern. We stayed a desert people by choice, to preserve our culture. At any time, we water users could have flooded the village and created the lush green landscape enjoyed by the Leaf Village, for example. Or we could have become an island, like the land of waves. But our culture was to be preserved.”
Yuuko paused, taking a sip of the tea set before her. She looked up over the rim of her cup, her blue eyes startling in their intensity.
“We all agreed on that issue. However, keeping the village safe was the biggest priority. This meant that our group was treated with the utmost respect, as ‘preservers of life.”

“So what happened?” Naruto chimed in, fascinated by the tale. It sounded a little like his own tale.

“As you might imagine, it put us in precarious position with the village…”

“How so?” Sakura wondered.

“As much as we could GIVE life, if we withheld our abilities, we could TAKE it as well. So everyone walked on eggshells around us. We didn’t see ourselves as different. We were another contributing force. Just as you need water to build a sandcastle, you need water to build a sand village. But like the tide, we could take the water away. Or, worse yet to a village ill-equipped to deal with it, give too much of it. Under the first and second Kazekage, this was no problem. The Third, however, was problematic. It began with the birth of his third son, our current Kazekage. Making him into a jinchuuriki was the Third’s greatest feat…and his greatest folly.”
Yuuko adjusted her position, then continued. The Leaf ninja exchanged glances. Shikamaru moved into his ‘thinking’ position, settling in to listen to the rest of the tale.

“Our abilities are unique to us and our offspring. So when the Third Kazekage decided to destroy his own son; the son he had made into an ultimate weapon; we were chosen to help. After one battle, in which my oldest son died, it was determined we weren’t enough. So he began to experiment. Eventually, the experiment expanded to add ‘immortality’ to the list. And it came close to being the fountain of youth the Kazekage hoped for. For example- I’m 96 years old, and yet my chakra feels like that of someone much younger. When my husband was taken, we were both in our eighties. After the experiment, I became younger- about seventy. And when even more chakra was added to my system, I appeared about sixty. But that second chakra belonged to a young man who was wounded in battle. As he lay dying, his chakra was transferred into me. That’s why my chakra feels so young and vibrant.”

That was a lot to digest. The Leaf shinobi were quite while they considered what was said. After a while, Asuma broke the silence.
“So why you? Any idea why you in particular were picked for this experiment? I mean, if it could have been anyone, wouldn’t they have chosen someone younger?” Asuma held his cigarette between his fingers, his face set in a thoughtful expression.

“Good question,” Yuuko said. “Simply put, I was- and still am- the most powerful among us. And only the most powerful would stand a chance. I may be the only one to ever have attempted to assassinate Gaara- er, Lord Kazekage- and live to tell the tale.”
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Azami had already told Ryouko about the incident that set her on this path of life. Now she told him about all the people she had killed, threatened, or betrayed. There were so many accounts of evil that she didn’t even bother to illustrate them all.

Ryouko, for his part, listened attentively. This was a rare glimpse into Azami’s past- possibly the only person to safeguard herself against relationships more than Ryouko. As he listened, Ryouko felt a few things. Shock was most prominent. But at the same time, he felt a warm sort of sympathy for her.

It couldn’t have been easy for her, surviving that way. She had no choice after that botched mission she told me about, but still…It doesn’t seem like she WANTED to kill people. And it doesn’t seem like she got any pleasure from her evil. She was just existing in the only way she could.

At the end of her tale, Azami sighed and nuzzled Ryouko. She hadn’t meant to say it aloud, but it slipped out:
“I wish this was my reality…”
She blushed immediately after saying it, but didn’t try to pretend she hadn’t said anything.

Ryouko put a hand on the back of her head, doing his best to smile at her. He wasn’t good at it, but he gave it the best effort he could.
“Just answer this- did you ENJOY doing any of those things? Killing, stealing, etc?”

“…No,” Azami answered, seeming bashful. “Never. I just…did those things because it made sense at the time.”
She lowered her eyes.
“That’s all…”

“Then I’ve got to say, you’re not a bad person. If you didn’t do all those bad things for fun or pleasure, then you were just being a shinobi. You were doing what you had to for survival. It’s what we all have to do.”

“You’re too forgiving…”

Ryouko shook his head. “No. I’m not. You’re worthy of forgiveness, although I’m not one who can give it. But I’m no good example. There are people I plan to punish- even kill- for things they’ve done to people important to me.”

“What about for yourself? Don’t you want revenge at people who did things to you personally?”

“No. In my life’s philosophy, there is no room for ‘me’, the individual’s issues. I’ve got no one to blame but myself for the most part. But others…like the Third Hokage, and Naruto and Sakura…people who hurt them I can’t forgive. I’ll carry the grudges to my dying day if they aren’t resolved.”

Those were powerful words, to be sure. Neither of them said anything for a few moments. As if by silent agreement, they both began to walk to the Fire Daimyo’s temple. It was only once they were on the path there again that Ryouko said something else.
“Lady Uzume may be the person who can help you forgive yourself. I won’t pry about your religious beliefs; that you’ll have to do on your own. But I don’t think it’ll hurt you to talk to someone. Especially her; she’s helped me a great deal. In a way, I have you both to thank for me getting back on my feet.”

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